作文求助~

lxc1989614

5月10日11.8.20 NA Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? The most important investment for a big company is to improve the efficiency and proficiency of its employees

What we have been debating here will affect the success of a company in a competitive society. This debate over efficiency of employees is about more than just management of a firm. It is about a method that we want to operate a company. And I claim that improvement of the proficiency of it's employees is the most vital consideration in investment. That is what I want to spend time talking about.

To begin with, employees, as the core of a company, play an indispensible role in the operation of a company. Without high efficiency of them, the whole company cannot survive from the competition with other opponents. To give you an idea of how much harm caused to a company, consider this: a recent survey reveals that compare with the company equipped with high proficiency employees, their counterparts yield less in profit. According to this, we can safely draw the conclusion that high efficiency is necessary for a company.

Surely, there has always been another remarkable advantage--impetus for better work performance. Investment in the increasing of the employees’ proficiency will not only benefits the company as a whole but also the situation between employees themselves. I want to thank my boss ,who always put high emphasis on the efficiency of workers ,which improves my working capability. Consequently, I got promotion because of my excellent working efficiency. Hardly can we gain this in a low efficiency system.

Nevertheless, there are those who believe we should invest more in other aspects such as the condition of office, out of fear that any overlooking of them will gradually usher in losing of talents in a firm. But I will not walk away from my viewpoint. The high efficiency increases the avenue which can provide more money for other aspect of a company. It is the answer spoken by managements or leaders, the people who sent a message to the questionnaire conducted by Economical Department of Peking University, all of these concluded the same result that high efficiency is important.

For all reasons listed, it is time to end investment huge money in the hardware that rarely brings benefits and doulbt down on the proficiency of employees that never has been more successful. High proficiency that leads to a champion company, high efficiency that inspires employees, high efficiency that earns more money. Building a high proficiency system is part of what made a company superpower

lxc1989614

tpo14. 5.13综合写作


The lecture completely rejects the idea presented in the reading passage that the salvage logging should be used to remove the remains of the dead trees which does good to the damaged forest and the economy. In the professor's opinion, it will cause longer environmental problems and bring less benefits.

The lecture contradicts the first point in the reading that salvage logging makes room for fresh growth and help the recovery of the forest. She contends that It is not a good way to afford a good condition for the fresh trees, since decompose of the dead trees makes the soil more suitable for the fresh growth. Removing it will decrease the nutrition of the soil.

The speaker goes on to disagree the claim of the author that salvage logging helps minimize the danger of insect infestation and contributes to the health of the forest. On the contrary,she argues that not all insects are harmful to the forest,some like birds and insects also contribute a lot to the health of the forest.Removing the dead trees may cause more harm than insects.

Finally,the professor challenges the final point of the material that salvage logging brings economic benefits.She reminds us that we use expensive machines like helicopter to remove the dead trees which even trigger more fees to maintain.Moreover,we also have to provide salary for the temporary job.Because we are likely to train these people from outside rather than local .

超级无敌小鹤鹤

What we have been debating here will affect the success of a company in a competitive society. This debate over efficiency of employees is about more than just management of a firm.(首先，第二句话结构错误，谓语动词is在这充当主句的谓语动词路基上不成立；其次，这两句话开头显得很啰嗦累赘，不妨缩成一个复合句，比如：The hearted debate, whether efficiency of employees is about more than just management of a firm, are now affecting the success of a company in a competitive society. )It is about a method that we want to operate a company(这儿你想表达什么意思？我觉得你的想法是：it should be thought deeply about before operateing a company). And I claim that improvement of the proficiency of it's(its) employees is the most vital consideration in investment. That is what I want to spend time talking about.

To begin with, employees, as the core of a company, playan indispensible(indispensable) role in the operation of a company. Without high efficiency of them, the whole company cannot survive from the competition with other opponents. To give you an idea of how much harm caused to a company, consider this: (首先，这句话太口语了；其次，这句话太chiglish，how much harm，那么到底是什么导致的harm呢？这些都没说，导致看起来很不能理解。所以索性去掉它)a recent survey reveals that compare with the company equipped with high proficiency employees, their(这儿their指什么？语法上只能指代employees') counterparts yield less in profit. According to this, we can safely draw the conclusion that high efficiency is necessary for a company.

Surely, there has always been another remarkable advantage--impetus for better work performance. Investment in theincreasing of the employees’ proficiency will not only benefits(benefit not only，首先will后面用动词原形，其次not only but also结构要对称) the company as a whole but also the situation between employees themselves. I want to thank my boss ,who always put high emphasis on the efficiency of workers ,which(此处which用法不太好，因为这儿which你要指代的东西在前面的宾语从句里面) improves my working capability. Consequently, I got promotion because of my excellent working efficiency. Hardly can we gain this in a low efficiency system.

Nevertheless, there are those(怪怪的，用there are still some people) who believe we should invest more in other aspects such as the condition of office, out of fear that any overlooking of them(them指代什么？) will gradually usher in losing of talents in a firm. But I will not walk away from my viewpoint. The high efficiency increases the avenue which can provide more money for other aspects of a company. It is the answer spoken by managements or leaders, the people who sent a message to the questionnaire conducted by Economical Department of Peking University, and all of these concluded the same result that high efficiency is important.

For all reasons listed, it is time to end investment(investing) huge money in the hardware that rarely brings benefits and doulbts down on the proficiency of employees that never has been more successful(that在这儿用来解释什么？语法上是解释employees). High proficiency that leads to a champion company, high efficiency that inspires employees, high efficiency that earns more money.(句子的并列连接只能用连词或者分号) Building a high proficiency system is a part of what made a company superpower

总的来说文章还行，但是很多地方存在比较严重的语法错误，尤其是从句的使用，希望多加以注意！一些句子的表达也比较的生硬，我觉得还需要多练练哈~~~

lxc1989614

5月14日11.12.17 NA Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? It is impossible to be completely honest with your friends.

From America to China, honesty among friends becomes a major concern. Whether people are encouraged by the increasing of the moral standard or demand of seeking truth, they prefer to be completely honest with their friends.And I claim that completely honest is necessary.

To begin with,honesty is a law of conduct in the social life. Anyone disobey it may trigger some problems like lacking friends.To give you an idea of how much damage the shortage of honesty caused to a friendship,consider this:a recent survey reveals that compare to those who are not completely honest to theri friends,their counterparts have more friends and less trouble in social interaction. It is completely honest that enable one make friends with ease.

Surely,there has always been another remarkable advantage--improvement of the friendship.I want to thank my best friend Mary.She pointed out a big mistake in my essay,thus  avoiding an embarrassing situation. Consequently, I have received an excellent grade in the final exam.After that,we help each other in the study and become more intimate than ever before.Hardly can a relationship go further under dishonest status.

Finally,there are still someone who believe we should not completely honest ,out of fear that completely honest will gradually usher in a collapse of a friendship since some words may hurt the opposite.But I will not walk away from my viewpoint.There is an old Chinese saying goes ,you never can hide a secret.It is better for us to tell the truth rather than hide it.It is the answer spoken by people from all walks of life,all of these concluded the same result that completely honest is crucial.

For all the reasons listed,it is time to end lying that rarely brings trust and double down on the completely honest that never has been more needed in modern society.Completely honest that attracts more friends;completely honest that inspires closer relationship; completely honest that reveals the truth.Completely honest is part of what made a relationship unshakeable.

lxc1989614

TPO15 综合
The lecture completely rejects the idea presented in the passage about the methods to stop the spread of the cane toad.In the professor's opinion,these ways of eliminating are not success and will have negative impact on the environment.

The speaker contradicts the first point in the passage that building a national fence helps to prevent the spread of the toad.She contends that some young toad and toad eggs in the stream or lack will flow with the water to other side of the fence.So these toad can establish population in other side of the fence,which means this method does not work.

The listening material goes on to opposite the viewpoint of the author that the toads could be captured and destroyed by volunteers.She argues that these untrained volunteers can not take part the native frogs from the toads which leads to a huge destroy of these extinct native frogs.

Finally,the professor challenges the last viewpoint in the passage that a kind of disease-causing virus can control the can toad population.She remainds us that this method damage the original habitat of the king toad.In Austrilia some organs are transported to other continent. These infected toad will affect native king toad and destroy its population.And king toad plays an important role in the ecosystem. So ,this method may cause some bad problem.

晨依Jacqueline

513综合修改
The lecture completely rejects the idea presented in the reading passage that the salvage logging should be used to remove the remains of the dead trees which does good to the damaged forest and the economy. In the professor's opinion, it(感觉指代不明)will cause longer environmental problems and bring less benefits.

The lecture contradicts the first point in the reading that salvage logging makes room for fresh growth and help the recovery of the forest. She contends that It(it)is not a good way to afford a good condition for the fresh trees, since decompose of the dead trees makes(made) the soil more suitable for the fresh growth. (感觉如果中间能加个连接词就更好了)Removing it will decrease the nutrition of the soil.

The speaker goes on to disagree(on/with) the claim of the author that salvage logging helps minimize(minimizing?)the danger of insect infestation and contributes to the health of the forest. On the contrary,she argues that not all insects are harmful to the forest,(这是另外一个句子了，断句，或者because....)some like birds and insects also contribute a lot to the health of the forest.(建议这里加一个She further states that...)Removing the dead trees may cause more harm than insects.

Finally,the professor challenges the final point of the material that salvage logging brings economic benefits.She reminds us that we use expensive machines like helicopter to remove the dead trees which even trigger more fees to maintain.Moreover,we also have to provide salary for the temporary job.Because(because) we are likely to train these people from outside rather than local . (建议少用we这种词，因为综合写作不需要表达个人观点，应该写得更客观一些，尽量用第三人称写。)



整体写得很不错啦、句子很流畅，用词也很棒~注意下逗号后面和下一个词中间应该有个小空格吧、倒不是大问题~~继续加油了！

sang824

The lecture completely rejects the idea presented in the passage about the methods to stop the spread of the cane toad.In the professor's opinion,these ways of eliminating are not success and will have negative impact on the environment. 开头简洁，好

The speaker contradicts the first point in the passage that building a national fence helps to prevent the spread of the toad.She contends that some young toad and toad eggs in the stream or lack will flow with the water to other side of the fence.So these toads can establish population in other side of the fence,which means this method does not work.

The listening material goes on to opposite the viewpoint of the author that the toads could be captured and destroyed by volunteers.She argues that these untrained volunteers can not take part the native frogs from the toads which leads to a huge destroy of these extinct native frogs. 这个which用在这里不对，要么逗号隔开，要么直接leaing好了

Finally,the professor challenges the last viewpoint in the passage that a kind of disease-causing virus can control the can toad population.She remainds us that this method damages the original habitat of the king toad.In Austrilia some organs are transported to other continent. These infected toads will affect native king toad and destroy its population.And king toad plays an important role in the ecosystem. So ,this method may cause some bad problem.最后一段都是单句，觉得可以用用连词，不过综合写作不知道要求有没有这么高了哈



总体来说很不错，语言简洁结构清晰，听力也很完整
注意一下小错误就ok啦~

rocer

From America to China
, honesty among friends becomes a major concern. Whether people are encouraged by the increasing of the moral standard or demand of seeking truth, they prefer to be completely honest with their friends. And I claim that completely honest is necessary.

To begin with,honesty is a law of conduct in the social life. Anyone disobey it (Anyone who disobey it) may trigger some problems like lacking friends. To give you an idea of how much damage the shortage of honesty caused to a friendship, consider this :a recent survey reveals that compare to those who are not completely honest to theri friends, their counterparts have more friends and less trouble in social interaction. It is completely honest that enable one make friends with ease.
例子觉得很不错，过渡的也不错。
Surely, there has always been another remarkable advantage--improvement of the friendship.I want to thank my best friend Mary. She pointed out a big mistake in my essay, thus avoiding an embarrassing situation. Consequently, I have received an excellent grade in the final exam.After that,we help each other in the study and become more intimate than ever before. Hardly can a relationship go further under dishonest status.
（感觉第一个理由和第二个理由意思上有点重合）
Finally,there are still someone who believe we should not completely honest ,out of fear that completely honest will gradually usher in a collapse of a friendship since some words may hurt the opposite. But I will not walk away from my viewpoint.There is an old Chinese saying goes ,you never can hide a secret.It is better for us to tell the truth rather than hide it.It is the answer spoken by people from all walks of life,（句式略微单一）all of these concluded the same result that completely honest is crucial.

For all the reasons listed, it is time to end lying that rarely brings trust and double down on the completely honest that never has been more needed in modern society. Completely honest that attracts more friends;completely honest that inspires closer relationship; completely honest that reveals the truth.Completely honest is part of what made a relationship unshakeable.

lxc1989614

The lecture completely rejects the concern presented in the passage about the decling of the birds' population because of the human activities.In the professor's opinion, the arguments in the reading are unconvencing.

The professor contradicts the first point in the material that birds' natural habitats will shrinking due to the expanding human populations and  settelements.She contends that because of the development of the urban,other kinds of birds is increasing such as seaguls and hocks.Some residents in urban even complain about the disturbing of the birds.

The speaker goes on to opposite the claim of the athor that the growth of agriculture will also deprive the  birds' habitats.On the contrary,she argues that nowadays people begin to use less and less lands for agriculture since the productivity of the crops have been improved ,which afford enough food for human beings and we no longer call for these areas.

Finally, the listening challenges the last viewpoint in the passage that the usage of chemical pesticides will do harm to the birds since they eat these poisoned insects.She reminds us that,the traditional pesticides will be abandoned because people start to realize the negetive consequence.So there are two changes now,first people now start to apply new and less toxic pesticides.Moreover there is a trend for pestside resident crops.All these reasons are good news for protecting birds.

lxc1989614

8月14日
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement. Although science and technology will continue to improve, the most significant improvement for the quality of people's lives have already taken place

With abundant of cutting-edge technologies emerge every minute and every second, some people assert with full confidence that we have finished all the improvement to raise people's living standard. I, on the contrary, think that we still have long way to go to accomplish all the significant breakthrough in human history, although we enjoy advanced technology.



On one hand, the environmental problems still pose a huge threat to human beings' life and should be settled immediately. Science and technology bring us great convenience in our daily life, meanwhile, they also have negative impact on the environment. Car emission polluted fresh air and chemical substances contaminated clean lacks. People nowadays are more likely to suffer from diseases such as lung cancer caused by environmental pollution. Under this circumstance, many countries in the world start to set up policies and laws to deal with these problems. But the result is so tiny that the environment is still worsening. Obviously, people still have a lot of work to do in tackling the environmental issues.



On the other hand, population explosion also should be putted on the to-do list. As the population increasing at an alarming rate, resources become exhausted and various conflicts are around corner. A latest study found in China Daily, a prevalent newspaper in China, unveils that 75% of the developing countries feel overwhelming when facing exceed population, especially in the poverty-stricken areas. It lowers the living standard of people and education quality, which are the obstacle for a country to step forward. It is the population issues that need our attention.



Nevertheless, hardly can every people reach to a consensus. Some people argue that in majority of countries world wide, people live in a prosperity life and have achieved a high quality of life, so we can say that the improvements have already taken place. But I will not walk away from my viewpoint. Only when all people in the earth can enjoy same level life can we say we have finished our task.



For all the reasons listed, it is time to applaud continuing progress in our life instead of contenting the current situation. What the endeavor we do will benefit not only ourselves but also the next generation.