Anthony Summer的写作贴~~~互帮互助共同进步啊!~~~~~求狠狠的批~~~~~????????????????????????????

AnthonySummer

提交晚了,对不起啊!辛苦你批改了!10.27
Patience is usually not a good strategy. We should take action now rather than later.


"If I have seen further it is by standing upon the shoulder of giants", said Isaac Newton. He would never become a top scientist if he did not spend decades of studying physics and mathematics. What made him the top scientist was patience. So I thought patience is the best strategy to be successful.


"Ten thousands hours of practice makes a genius." This is so called genius theory. Look at that billionaire such as George Soros; Bill Gates and Warren Buffet, several common parts of them are rich, smart and patient. Soros is a famous but bad reputation investor. The best important character of a top investor is patient. Soros waited several months, and gathered over seven billions of dollars and just took one shot, crash the financial system of several Asian countries such as Laos and Vietnam. Just like a tiger need wait for several days at a tiny bosk for praying, it needs endure lonely and stick of woods. So a long time to prepare is the key to success, if we take action now rather than a perfect moment that will scare the prey, and we gain nothing.


As my example, I am a trader at an international trading company. A good trader requires patience. My strategy is doing the homework first; I will check the company's background, who is his competition, how is the personality of the board members. I will try to find everything if the time allows to do that. Then I will decide whether to buy the company's stock or not. And the result proves that my strategy is right.


In one conclusion, if we want to be the top of any area, we need to spend several years to practice. So patience is the key to success, rich and genius.

AnthonySummer

Tpo 13The reading and the professor holds different opinion of comical fossil dig.
First, the professor point that private collectors gave more exposure to the fossils, thereby more fossils will be purchased, because originally there only have limited library and school will purchase fossils. Against the reading, that public is harder to see fossils and leading a decline in public interest in fossils.
Second, the professor illustrates that the fossils need to be researching scientist then it will be added value. So scientists will have more access to some of the most important fossils and find our more potentially crucial discoveries about extinct life forms.
Third, the professor argued that commercial fossil collectors will damage limited amounts of fossils, without them, there would be more fossils buried underground. It is rather have more fossil to be found than limited scientific institution dig small amounts of fossils.

正儿八经潜水

TPO2

The lecture and reading passage holds（hold）different opinions about group responsibility and contribution. The lecture rejects thatgroup work will be more creative and helpful.
Firstly, the lecturerobjects to passage that a group can work more quickly in response to the task assigned to it because a group of people has(have) a wider range of knowledge and skill than any individual.(这句话太长，而且有歧义，应当长短句结合)Actually the group is very slow to（be slow to是不理解，迟钝的意思，这样表达是不对的，可以用动词） finish the project because the group members spend a lot of time on the meetings to build a relationship and to come up with a solution.
Second, the passage point out that taking part in a group process can be very rewarding for members of the team, and the individual team member has a much better chance to ""shire". The truth is that some group members got(gets) a free ride. They do not contribute to the group at all , but at the end of the project, the job well done(中式英文，用the achievement)belongs to every member.
Finally, against to the reading passage’s opinion that the group spreads responsibility for a decision to all the members and thus no single individual can be held accountable if the decision turns out to be wrong. The professor illustrates that influential people might lead the group toward glory or failure. If the keypeople made a right decision, it would be no problem. But nobody can influence to result(这个to多余了吧，不通了) if the leader made a wrong decision.

正儿八经潜水

TPO3

The reading passage and lecture hold opposite opinions about the realistic of Rembrandt painting. The lecture points out this painting is an original one.
Firstly, the lecture points out the inconsistency about the way on the woman's dress in the portrait is because of someone add another layer over the top of original painting 100 years ago., because that(That) person wants to increase the value of painting. Reading passage’s point that Rembrandt was known for his attention to the details is true.
Latterly, the passage illustrates that Rembrandt was a master of painting light and shadow, but in this painting there elements donot fit together. The lecture mentioned it because of the layer added on the original one that has changed the reflection. If weare watching without the layer, we can find the shadow appears rightly.
Finally, the lecture objects to the passage that Rembrandt never uses this kind of glued together panel was faked because those words were added latterly because people can't make it look valuable.(这句话太长，而且有歧义，应当长短句结合)Although the painting reveals was painted on a panel made of several pieces of wood glued together, but the lecture said they found a self-patriot painted by Rembrandt used(using) the same wood.
总体来说，最严重的问题就是句子太过冗长，导致很多语法问题，请注意长短句结合！！

AnthonySummer

10.29Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Governments should focus its budgets more on environmental protection than on economic development.


If we damaged the nature environment, that will be very hard to us to recover it, meantime, we will spend much more money on recovering than protecting. People are less willing come to the local community to invest or consuming. Terrible environment will decrease people's investment motivation. Therefore, I agree that governments should focus its budgets more on environmental protection than on economic development.


Almost everyone likes to live and work at a good environmental city such as Hawaii and Florida. Their beautiful nature environment attractive many tourists; tourists will spend huge amounts of money on sightseeing and hotels. Those consume activity will bring more work opportunity and increase the local tax revenues, and then the government would have more money spend on environment protection and economic development. The local economy is better and better because of the beautiful nature. That will be a win-win solution. Once we damaged the nature, it would never or take a very long time to recovery. During the recovery period, other cities those preserve a beautiful and magnificent nature environment will have an advantage and take a first step to attract more tourists to visit their city.


Furth more, most companies, and factories like to build a branch at a good environment city, but different type of industry will have a huge difference of tax paying. For example, , a small investment company in a financial industry, which has less than fifty employees, will generate same revenue as a manufactory factory, which has one thousand employees. No doubt that a manufactory factory will greatly damage the nature, more employees mean more transportation vehicle requirement that creates lots of traffic and tail gas, factory need plenty of water to produce products. With a huge contrast, a small investment company will not damage the nature environment but bring more revenue to the city, people with higher salaries who are willing to live in a beautiful environment.


In one conclusion, a good environment will attractive more tourist and financial company, they will bring more revenue and tax to the local city that is very good for the economic development. Therefore, the government should spend more budgets on the environmental protection.

AnthonySummer

Tpo 15
The reading passage and the lecture hold opposite opinions to decrease the multiplied rapidly population of toad.

First, professor objects to the reading passage's suggestion about building a national fence to block and prevent the road from moving one part to another part. She pointed that young toad use rivers and streams for transportation, the toad species can rapidly give birth to new eggs only if limited numbers of toad across the fence.

Regarding the second measures, the reading passage suggests that volunteers can capture and destroy the toads and eggs. As contrary, the professor pointed out that inexperience volunteers have difficult to judge between the toad and frogs, which are native Australian species and in dangers, so this suggestion will not be able to work.

Finally, the reading passage illustrated that we can develop a disease-causing virus to control the can toad populations. The virus will specially design so it will harm only the can toads. The professor disagreed about this solution, and she said that the virus would eliminate Australia's cane toad population, too. Meantime, some pet collectors and research will bring the toad virus back to toad's original habits- Central-South-America; this will endanger its original species.

lmylacoste

If we damaged the nature environment, that will be very hard to us to recover(恢复个人觉得reclaim会更好，有待讨论哈) it, meantime（不是连词哦,缺连词）, we will spend much more money on recovering than protecting. People are less willing（是不是漏了to，will是动词哦） come to the local community to invest or consuming（consume作vi是耗尽的意思，这里不太好吧）. Terrible environment will decrease people's investment motivation. Therefore, I agree that governments should focus its budgets more on environmental protection than on economic development.


Almost everyone likes to live and work at a good environmental city such as Hawaii and Florida. Their beautiful nature environment attractive（应该是attract）many tourists; tourists will spend huge amounts of money on sightseeing and hotels. Those consume（consume是动词，àconsumption）activity will bring more work opportunity and increase the local tax revenues, and then the government would have more money spend on environment protection and economic development. The local economy is(表未来用will be吧) better and better because of the beautiful nature. That will be a win-win solution. Once we damaged the nature, it would never（有点别扭怎么。。impossible） or take a very long time to recovery. During the recovery period, other cities those（which） preserve a beautiful and magnificent nature environment will have an advantage and take a first step（采取第一步？求解释） to attract more tourists to visit their city.


Furth more（furthermore）, most companies and factories like（可以高级点啊in favor of） to build a branch at a good environment city, but different type(types) of industry will have a huge difference of taxpaying. For example, a small investment company in a financial industry, which has less than fifty employees, will generate (要加个the)same revenue as a manufactory factory, which has one thousand employees. No doubt that a manufactory factory will greatly damage the nature, more employees mean more transportation vehicle（多余了，要不不要transportation好了） requirement that creates lots of traffic and tail gas, factory need（选一个加s吧） plenty of water to produce products. With a huge contrast（好像不是固定用法吧，in marked contrast to 比较好，或者by contrast）, a small investment company will not damage the nature environment but bring more revenue to the city, people with higher salaries who are willing to live in a beautiful environment. (不知道people是你的另一完整句意，还是investment company带来的，如果是后者要加and)


In one conclusion, a good environment will attractive more tourist and financial company（都应该用复数吧）, they will bring more revenue and tax to the local city that is（are，因为that指代revenue and tax） very good for the economic development. Therefore, the government should spend more budgets on the environmental protection.



总结：

用词丰富，句型多样；

分论点：tourist 和financial company ，尤其是tourist部分用了对比论证Once… 内容详实

不过个别词把握不准确，有些关键词缺少变化，如attract，have等

第三段好像论证方向有误，应该是environmentàfinancial companyà好处，然而你举的例子是对比例子àfinancial companyà好处和env好像关系不大，建议加一句financial喜欢在环境好的地方

lmylacoste

The reading passage and the lecture hold opposite opinions to decrease the multiplied rapidly population of toad.

First, professor objects to the reading passage's suggestion about building a national fence to block and（不是并列关系吧àto） prevent the roadàtoad from moving one part to another part(part?是河对面用side比较好). She pointed that young toad use rivers and streams for transportation（这句的意思好像不准确，应该是flow carry the toad）, the toad species can rapidly give birth to new eggs only if limited numbers of toad across the fence.

Regarding the second measures, the reading passage suggests that volunteers can capture and destroy the toads and eggs. As contrary, the professor pointed out that inexperience volunteers have difficult（àdifficulties 应该是n） to judge（judge是裁决的意思啊，太大了吧，用识别比如indentify就好了）between the toad and frogs, which are native Australian species and in dangersàin danger, so this suggestion will not be able to work.

Finally, the reading passage illustrated that we can develop a disease-causing virus to control the can toad populations. The virus will specially design so it will harm only the can toads. The professor disagreed about this solution, and she said that the virus would eliminate Australia's cane toad population, too. Meantime, some pet collectors and researchàresearchers will bring the toad virus back to toad's original habitsàhabitats 栖息地- Central-South-America; this will endanger its original species.



总结

总体意思到位，内容完整

字数有点少啊

个别词用的不是很准确

小滋滋

什么情况？

小滋滋

1029改
First, professor objects to the reading passage's suggestion about building a national fence to block and（to） prevent the road(toad) from moving one part to another part(area). She pointed that young toad use rivers and streams for transportation, the toad species can rapidly give birth to new eggs only if limited numbers of toad across the fence. (听力对应点不准确，建议再听听)

Regarding the second measures, the reading passage suggests that volunteers can capture and destroy the toads and eggs. As contrary, the professor pointed out that inexperience volunteers have difficult（difficulties） to judge difference between the toad and frogs, which are native Australian species and in dangers(in danger), so this suggestion will not be able to work.

Finally, the reading passage illustrated that we can develop a disease-causing virus to control the can toad populations. The virus will specially design so it will harm only the can toads. The professor disagreed about this solution, and she said that the virus would eliminate Australia's cane toad population, too. Meantime, some pet collectors and researchàresearchers will bring the toad virus back to toad's original habits)habitats) Central-South-America; this will endanger its original species