Anthony Summer的写作贴~~~互帮互助共同进步啊!~~~~~求狠狠的批~~~~~????????????????????????????

AnthonySummer

10.14The best way to improve the quality of education is to increase teachers 'salaries'.
Most people chose to be a teacher as their career not because of this job can earn a lot of money but they are interesting in education and passing their professional experience to our next generation as their responsibilities, simultaneous, they enjoy spending time with children or young adult. So I disagree that increasing salaries is the best way.
I knew some top business school teacher. Most of them are forties or fifties, so they already accumulate over twenty years working experience before they become a teacher. They don't care too much about salaries because they thought taught at school were their social duty. The quality of their education style is always the best.
I heard a story happened with World War Two in Nazi German: two Jewish brothers want to escape from German. The elder brother asked a friend's help because he used to help this friend a lot, so he thought his friend would help him this emergency time. Young brother asked a friend who was always helping him. Finally the elder brother did not survive, but the younger one did. As a teacher if his personality was only asking money but not devoting, increase his salaries was no help. As instead, some volunteer teacher did an excellent job without any salaries. So I thought teacher's characteristic much more important than the salary.
Sometimes teachers devote their youth to education career. They have great education quality and a wonderful personality, had a lot of positive influence on the students. But the teachers were not paid well. I suggest the government could use some criteria and let the students to judge whether the teacher should be paid more or unqualified. This would motivate much more teacher. Just like the American presidential election: the voters decided the one who would bring more benefit can become the next president.
After all, a good teacher must have an attractive personality, then bring a high quality of education and only students had the right to judge who should be increased salaries.

AnthonySummer

Tpo 24
The professor points three evident objects to the reading passage's opinion about whether those remains belongs to a dinosaur fossil. He offered three alternative explanation.
Firstly, he against the statement that animal fossils provide very little opportunity to study the actual animal tissues. Because those bacteria inside the blood vassals proved evidence that it should be moist residue bacteria and have helped researcher figure out.
Latterly, the professor doubts the red substance in the sphere. The reading passage said it is those remain in red blood cells. But he claimed the red substance was also found in other animals. Live at the same area but no red blood vessels. So he thought the sphere should be red minerals.
Finally, the professor doubts the existence of collagen inside the fossil. Because those collagen never was found in fossils 130,000 years ago. Not mention was inside fossils 10 million years ago. It should be human's remain such as researcher's skin tissue.

阿伦艾弗森

The professor points three evident objects to the reading passage's opinion about whether those remains belongs to a dinosaur fossil. He offered three alternative explanation.(感觉第二句于第一句语义有些重复。)
Firstly, he against （这是个介词）the statement that animal fossils provide very little opportunity to study the actual animal tissues. Because those bacteria inside the blood vassals proved evidence that it should be moist residue bacteria and have helped researcher figure out. （连词多了。建议以后写完长句子检查一下）
Latterly, the professor doubts the red substance in the sphere. The reading passage said it is those remain in red blood cells. But(but, and 这样的句子最好不要放开头，况且一个谓语出现的句子里不能有连词)he claimed that the red substance was also found in other animals. Live at the same area but no red blood vessels. (这不是句子。没有谓语)So he thought the sphere should be red minerals.
Finally, the professor doubts（建议换个词，让自己的语言丰富起来） the existence of collagen inside the fossil. Because those collagen never was found in fossils 130,000 years ago. Not mention was inside fossils 10 million years ago. It should be human's remain such as researcher's skin tissue


语法需要很大程度的强化。
听力的内容听的不完整，明确。
连词和谓语动词的关系需要明确
语言需要多样。

一点拙见，还望共同进步

luhuaipei

好啦，同学，批完啦~

AnthonySummer

10.15Agree or disagree, in order to succeed, you should be more like others than be different from everyone


A journey of success will be a long and lonely journey. Every successful people have him/her own unique expertise, so it is impossible to them like others. There has a theory so called "ten thousands genius theory", means you should at least accumulate ten thousands training time, because "practice make perfect". I believe the chance you can find a team member practice with you together that would below one percentage. So you destined to be different from everyone.
The most interesting book I like to read is biography. I knew a lot of successful people such as Bill Gates. Warren Buffet, George Soros and President Obama. They are different from everyone. Bill Gates grew up in a wealthy family. His mother is a board member of Technology Company and his father is a respect lawyer. His family background made him different from other ninty-five percentages ordinary American family. So Bill went to the best middle school and accepted computer education when 99 percentages of us still never heard about it. Bill and his best friends Bob are very smart people so they have a lot of comma interesting to share, but they are so thirsty of learning computer even slip into the computer room at mid-night just for using a computer. They broke lots of rule at their school and they were out of control. They didn't like others at all.
We call Buffet "the God of stock", because he can buy the most valuable stock at the cheapest price, and he made lots of money by using his unique standard to sift the best stock from over ten thousand in the global stock market. If he like anyone else, bought the same stock as our neighbors did, how he can once become the richest person on earth.
Although some successful people like Obama, Americans choose him as president because he spoke for the public. Some people would say he was more like others than to be different. But not everyone was graduated from Harvard law school like he did. Not everyone want to be the president. Even we graduated from samecollege but our major is different, or we have different dream to pursue.
In one conclusion, whether you noticed or not, successful people all had a different background and dream. If we want to be successful, we must have own expertise and characteristic.

AnthonySummer

Tpo 1
The lecturer rejects the ideas presented in the reading passage about four days work. In his opinion, the negative effects outweigh its benefit.
Firstly, the lecture disagrees the shortened workweek would increase company profits because hiring more staff would increase training spent and healthcare cost. Four-day work's healthcare spend as same as to five-day work's. The company also needs a larger office space to provide and buy more computer.
Latterly, the lecturer argues that the company would probably ask for a four-day worker to finish same amounts of work like a five-day worker. This will make worker overwork and would not reduce the unemployment rate. This against the reading passage mentioned that full-time employees' work would have to be shifted to others.
Finally, the reading passage said the four-day workweek would be better for individual employees and have more time to pursue private interests. The lecturer holds a different opinion. He points out that four-day employees would have a high risk when the bad economy coming and their job ability would decrease because they have less working experience. They would pass the promotion because the company would more willing hire full-time employee to become the manager.

margrate

综合修改 from margrate

chengzaaaa

有改的不对的地方欢迎指出讨论哟！共同进步！加油~

Ps.我16号下午到晚上没能上网，所以晚上回宿舍才看见你的作文，但是断网了所以17号中午才传，不好意思啊。

AnthonySummer

辛苦了！
10.16

Should all school teachers be required to attend courses every 5 years to update their knowledge?
It is an information society nowadays. Our young generations use Facebook or twitter to communication and social with their friends. It is very difficult to educate our next generation if we only use old fashion knowledge compare to those update information. Students would fascinate about new things and new knowledge would motivate them to study harder and well.
I am majoring in economics. In this financial world, investment bank and other bank institutions will invent some new module and rule every year, so they can re-package and resell financial product. They are so smart, so people call them "rocket sciences". Their update speeds far beyond other industries such mine or ship transportation. So I will check their website and news every week to catch up their speed. My college teachers also keep a good connection with the local Wall Street, and first hand information would provide students best chance to find an internship at their interesting career.
The world financial crisis happened in 2008. What if our teachers did not attend courses immediately, but waited another one year or even five years to update their knowledge. The school would lose their advantage of the education industry, and the students do not want to learn something already passed five years ago, and would never be used again. The school would suffer the shortage of students, and those students would waste their time to study useless knowledge.
Although other education area such like basic science, chemistry and high school mathematics, they did not have an extreme requirement of information update. If a teacher can use some example happen recently, to explain the deep meaning behind the story, that would greatly motivate students learning interesting.
In one conclusion, it is very necessary to update teachers' knowledge at least every 5 years. New knowledge will be attractive more students to learn well.

AnthonySummer

Tpo 2
The lecture and reading passage holds different opinion about group responsibility and contribution. The lecture rejects group work will be more creative and helpful.
Firstly, the lecturer objects to passage that a group can work more quickly in response to the task assigned to it because a group of people has a wider range of knowledge and skill than any individual. Actually the group is very slow to finish the project because the group members spend a lot of time on the meeting to build a relationship and to come up with a solution.
Second, the passage point out that taking part in a group process can be very rewarding for members of the team, and the individual team member has a much better chance to ""shire". The truth is that some group members got a free ride. They do not contribute to the group at all but at the end of the project, the job well done belongs to every member.
Finally, against to the reading passages opinion that the group spreads responsibility for a decision to all the members and thus no single individual can be held accountable if the decision turns out to be wrong. The professor illustrates that influential people might lead the group toward glory or failure. If the key people made a right decision would be no problem. But nobody can influence to result if the leader made a wrong decision.