【写作小分队】prodliu 作文，欢迎拍砖啊，越多越好

prodliu

哈哈，我考的是GMAT

prodliu

TPO3 综合

The lecture is mainly talking about three characteristics about a Rembrandt’s painting to show that this painting is drawn by him, which challenges what stated in the reading material that it could not be a work by Rembrandt.

In the passage, it is said that the dressing about the woman does not fit with the style Rembrandt likes. However, the lecturer claims that the fur collar of the woman was added by someone else for increasing the value of the painting hundreds of years ago. So, the original painting is just the kind of Rembrand favorite style.

The passage argues that the way of light and shadow applying shows that these elements do not fit together and thus it is not pictured by Rembrandt. Nevertheless, the speaker contends that once the added collar was removed, the original painting would be seen, and it shows that the women wears a simple color cloth, and the light color of cloth reflects the light, which illuminate woman’s face, that is the reason why her face do not appear partially in shadow. Therefore, the light and shadow in the original painting displays that this painting is very realistic and is absolutely Rembrant’s work.

Considering the wood panel, the lecturer believes that when the fur collar was added, some pieces of wood glued together to enlarge the painting in order to make the painting more grant and valuable. And the original painting was on a single panel. More evidences point out that the wood used in this painting comes from the same tree, which was used to be other Rembrant’s paintings back.

Accordingly, the contents in the passage are totally jeopardized by the lecturer, and the speaker uses three points to substantiate her opinion.

prodliu

TPO4 综合
In the lecture, the professor says that some scientists question the facts of the argument stated in the passage that the dinosaurs are endotherms.

According to the passage, some dinosaurs’ fossils were found in polar areas, and this finding shows that dinosaurs are endothermy animals, which can maintain their body’s temperature. However, the lecturer claims that the temperature of that time in the polar region is may be lower than what is today, and the warmer weather allows the animals that are not endotherm, such as dinosaurs to live. Moreover, even in the cold weather, the dinosaurs could migrate to warm places or just hibernate to deal with the cold weather.

The leg position of the dinosaurs made some people believe that dinosaurs are endotherm, because the legs of all modern endotherms are underneath the body. But, the speaker holds different opinion. The professor gives another explanation that this kind of body structure could be as a mean to hold more weight due to the large size of dinosaurs.

Dinosaurs indeed have a kind of bone structure named Habersian canals. However, researchers also found some growth rings near this bone structure. And these growth rings show that during a specific period, the dinosaurs did not grow quickly, and even stop growing in the cooling time. This pattern of growth reflects that the dinosaurs are not endothermy, and if they were, they will not grow slowly in the cold weather.

To sum up, the contents stated in the passage are totally jeopardized by the lecturer, and the professor holds completely different opinions about the evidences to prove that dinosaurs are endotherms.

gre呀gre

亲~ 我是4.7和你互改独立写作的哦~ 你大概什么时候能写好呢？或者写好在群上给我说下哈！~
我才发现咱们是同一天考的！！！！！！我也是4.28！

prodliu

With a rapid development of science and technology, our social situation changes fast. In order to make their children adapt to this fast changing society, most parents suggest them to do a part-time job. From my personal observation, I highly recommend this idea for the following reasons.

There is a gap between the knowledge we earned from college studying and experience gained from social life. Too often we observed that plenty students complaint that some knowledge and skills obtained from academic classes cannot be applied in a real situation, and that is the reason why the students need to participate more social activities, such as voluntary programs or part-time job. From these activities, young people can not only broaden their horizons, but also become more familiar with the situation out of the ivory tower. For instance, in the college, we usually fix a question and find the solution straightforwardly. However, in reality, sometimes we need to consider the situation thoroughly and logically before we reach the final solutions.

An advantage of taking part-time job is that students can apply the knowledge from books into a working place. Through the daily work, we will discover some domains that needed to improve, and when we back to university, we can just study these specific fields. Take my own experience for example, last year I did an internship at a financial department. During dealing with the cases, I figured out that my analysis ability is weak. Fortunately, my university just offers a course about logical analysis. Finally I made up this gap through my assiduous studying.

Involving within social life with a young age will ensure youngsters become mature. A majority of family have only one child due to the family plan policy, that lead to a phenomenon that parents will spoil their children badly. As a result, this generation has little knowledge about the truth of society. Sometimes they cannot endure unequal treatments or impolite words. Thus, such kind of social activities can make young people grown up both mentally and physically.

Admittedly, some people will argue that too early taking part in job may distract students from study, concerning that students usually have a lot of courses. But, in some degree, I believe that a relative proper mount of social activities will benefit students a lot.

Based on the reasons above, I can draw a conclusion that it is beneficial for the young to do a part-time job as long as it will not conflict their normal life, because such social activity will strong young people’s fortitude and endurance.

prodliu

Tpo5 综合
In the passage, three theories are stated as likely explanations of the function of Chaco Canyon great houses. However, the lecturer claims that none of the theories is convincing, and points out flaws in each theory.

The first theory in the passage argues that these houses are built for residential purpose. However, the lecturer the number of fire places contradicts the residential theory. Normally, if these huge houses can hold hundreds of people, there must have many fire places for people to cook. But, even in one of the biggest houses, there are few fire places, thus this theory is unsupportable.

Another theory states that these great houses are used for a function of storing food. On the contrary, the lecturer argues that a place that had been used for storing food, would leave many traces of maize or maize containers, but in the region of Chaco Canyon, there is little indicators about that.

The third theory demonstrates that the houses are used for ceremonial activities due to some broken pots in the excavation. In the lecture, some other materials such as large building tools are found near those pots, and this discovery suggests that these pots may just trashes discarded by workers after finishing their jobs.

To sum up, the contents narrated in the reading are totally jeopardized by the lecturer, and the professors have completely different opinions about the purposes of building these houses.

gre呀gre

4.7独立写作今晚改了一半，实在是太困了，不好意思明天早上再发上来，真不好意思了

婷婷connie

抱歉啊，昨天一直没有接触到电脑，今天给你改文~tpo3
TPO3 综合

The lecture is mainly talking about three characteristics about a Rembrandt’s painting to show that this painting is drawn by him, which challenges what stated in the reading material that it could not be a work by Rembrandt.(开头写得很精炼，不错)

(To begin with,)In the passage, it is said that the dressing about the woman does not fit with the style Rembrandt likes. However, the lecturer claims that the fur collar of the woman was added by someone else for increasing the value of the painting hundreds of years（听力里面是a hundred years） ago. So, the original painting is just the kind of Rembrand(Rembrandt's)favorite style.

(Besides,)The passage argues that the way of light and shadow applying(是名词吗?)shows that these elements do not fit together and thus it is not pictured by Rembrandt. Nevertheless, the speaker contends that once the added collar was removed, the original painting would be seen, and it shows that the women wears a simple color cloth, and the light color of cloth reflects the light, which illuminate woman’s face, that is the reason why her face do not appear partially in shadow. Therefore, the light and shadow in the original painting displays that this painting is very realistic and is absolutely Rembrant’s(Rembrandt's)work.

(Moreover)Considering the wood panel, the lecturer believes that when the fur collar was added, some pieces of wood glued together to enlarge the painting in order to make the painting more grant and valuable. And the original painting was on a single panel. More evidences point out that the wood used in this painting comes from the same tree, which was used to be other Rembrant’s paintings back.(另一幅画another painting of Rembrandt)

Accordingly, the contents in the passage are totally jeopardized by the lecturer, and the speaker uses three points to substantiate her opinion. (可以不用写结尾的)



建议：在每段前面加上连词，这样显得有逻辑感。听力已经很强了

gre呀gre

4.7独立写作改错With a rapiddevelopment of science and technology, our social situation changes fast. Inorder to make their children adapt to this fast changing society, most parentssuggest them(改成the children可能会比them指代清晰一些) to do a part-time job. From my personal observation, I highlyrecommend this idea for the following reasons.


There is a gapbetween the knowledge we earned from college studying（study就好，本身就是名词） and experience gained fromsocial life. Too often we observed that plenty（需要加of？） students complaint that someknowledge and skills obtained from academic classes cannot be applied in a realsituation（physical situation？）, and that is the reason why the students need to participate（in，vt是分享的意思） more social activities, suchas voluntary programs or part-time job（jobs）. From these activities, young people can not only broaden theirhorizons, but also become more familiar with the situation out of the ivorytower. For instance, in the college（at college）, we usually fix a question and find the solution straightforwardly.However, in reality, sometimes we need to consider the situation thoroughly andlogically before we reach the final solutions.

An advantage oftaking part-time job is that students can apply the knowledge from books into aworking place. Through the daily work, we will discover some domains that （are）needed to improve, and when we（are） back to university, we can just study these specific fields. Takemy own experience for example, last year I did an internship at a financial department.During dealing with the cases, I figured out that my analysis ability is weak.Fortunately, my university just offers（offered） a course about logical analysis. Finally I made up this gap throughmy assiduous studying.

Involving within social lifewith（within） a young age will ensure youngsters become mature. A majority offamily have only one child due to the family plan policy, that（which） lead（leads） to aphenomenon that parents will spoil their children badly. As a result, thisgeneration has little knowledge about the truth of society. Sometimes theycannot endure unequal treatments or impolite words. Thus, such kind of socialactivities can make young people grown（grow或者growing） up both mentally and physically.

Admittedly, somepeople will argue that too early taking part in job may distract students fromstudy, concerning that students usually have a lot of courses. But, in somedegree, I believe that a relative proper mount of social activities willbenefit students a lot.

晨依Jacqueline

Prodliu这是把好几天的综合写作都提前写完了啊，嘎嘎、好勤奋……
一会回去就看，提醒下表忘记贴链接哦
In the lecture, the professor says that some scientists question the facts of the argument stated in the passage that the dinosaurs are endotherms.(简洁直接，good~)

According to the passage, some dinosaurs’ fossils were found in polar areas, and this finding shows that dinosaurs are endothermy animals, which can maintain their body’s temperature. However, the lecturer claims that the temperature of that time in the polar region is may be(is maybe)lower(?我怎么听得是warmer than today呢) than what is(that of...这个地方我觉得你说的应该也是对的，但是又觉得比较的话前后是不是应该一致呢,请prodliu大神斟酌~) today, and the warmer weather allows the animals that are not endotherm(s), such as(like...such as后面应该是跟着好几个的) dinosaurs to live. Moreover, even in the cold weather, the dinosaurs could migrate to warm places or just hibernate(听的好仔细的说，我都听不出来，听出来了也拼不出来...膜拜ing) to deal with the(个人觉得不用加the也可以) cold weather.

The leg position of the dinosaurs made some people believe that dinosaurs are endotherm, because the legs of all modern endotherms are underneath the body.(我认为这个句子最好点明一下是reading说的，我猜是忘记写了。。。) But, the speaker holds different opinion(s). The professor gives another explanation that this kind of body structure could be as a mean(?是不是means,应该是单复同形的吧) to hold more weight due to the large size of dinosaurs.(我觉得这一段基本的点倒是说出来了，但是好像细节比较少呢，建议大神再听听原文看看有木有新的发现)

Dinosaurs indeed have a kind of bone structure named Habersian(拼错了不过没有大碍) canals. However, researchers also found some growth rings near this bone structure(首先我觉得near这么用就不大对，其次应该是在bone structure里面吧，它说的是have，应该是in吧？). And these growth rings show that during a specific period, the dinosaurs did not grow quickly, and even stop growing in the cooling time. This pattern of growth reflects that the dinosaurs are not endothermy, and if they were, they will not grow slowly in the cold weather.

To sum up, the contents stated in the passage are totally jeopardized by the lecturer, and the professor holds completely different opinions about the evidences to prove that dinosaurs are endotherms. (我觉得最后一句仔细读读还是分成两句写感觉舒服。)







论点一二三建议写一下，建议比较俗，但是感觉会比较有条理些呢。



第二个点建议再听一下细节。



大神就是大神。。。如果我改的不对的地方欢迎探讨~