【写作小分队】prodliu 作文，欢迎拍砖啊，越多越好

prodliu

Thus, I can imagine not too far inthe future, we can find ways to protect our environment.（这句有点chinglish，如果是我会这样写，

Thus ,it won't be too long for us to find effective ways to protect our environment .）
谢谢，这句写的确实chinglish

prodliu

312独立作文

Recent years, there is a weird phenomenon that when people making friends sometimes they depend on wealth(financial situation). They have a general theory that the rich only can make friends with some one who have equal status and wealth, or even have more money. As far as I am concerned, two people can be good friends no matter who is rich, because good friends are linked not by money, but by their interests, goals and virtues.

First and foremost, it is universally acknowledge that good friends or closed friends must have interests in common, it is a crucial bond between two people. They can share the same sports, music and films, and their relationships will improved and be intimated during conversations or talking. Taking my own experience for example, Damon is my best friend, and we have been good friends since we were kids. Because we both love soccer, we often together to see games at stadium on weekends, and after that we talk our feelings about the display and share our views on the team we both support, that is really a effective way to improve our friendship and make us better know about each other. Therefore, money cannot bring two people together, interests can.

Moreover, I think the most important quality of good friends is loyalty, which means he is always being honest to you and staying right beside you. Your friends can share not only your happiness, but also your sorrows. Sometimes, your friends can help you overcome frustrations and tough tasks. Examples abound in society, when Steve Jobs came back to Apple, his company was in a difficult situation, and he needed supports to reconstruct the company. Many of his friends immediately did their utmost to offer help to Steve, and finally make Apple back to prosperity. I believe Steve’s friends will not consider whether he is a rich man, they trust him and have faith that he can build one of the greatest companies all over the world, and of course Steve did. So, friends need loyalty, not money.

Admittedly, if one of your friends is rich, it could be good news for you, because it means that he could offer you financial assistant when you need help. Just as the old saying goes that a friend indeed is a friend in need, your friend must think you trustworthy or he will not lent money to you. However, only treat wealthy as the most significant standard while choosing friends is not wise decision.
 
Finally, friend is not your ATM, friend is a person who you can learn from. I am willingly to make friends with someone who is well-experienced of life, so many of my friends are seniors. I could listen to their life stories and absorb experiences, and I value these things as my lifelong treasures.

In conclusion, two people can be good friends as long as they share the same interests, value the same criteria of life and hold the same perspective of issues.

prodliu

312 tpo2 综合

In the lecture, the speaker states a research conducted by a firm that assembled a group of people into a team to approach new projects. He says that the theory stated in passage was jeopardized by the outcome of the research and in some degree inaccurate when compared to what happened in reality.

First of all, the professor points that some members get a free ride, they just did not contribute much at all. But if their team does a good job, they could benefit from the recognition the team gets, because no names are named in the projects. This opinion disagrees with what the reading material narrates that a group of people has a wider range of knowledge and skills that is likely to make the projects better implement.

Moreover, a team sometimes has to take a long time to reach consensus that slow the process of decision. They need a lot of meetings to make an agreement among team members. Therefore, the lecturer has an opposite view about a group of team could work quickly.

Finally, in a team, some influential persons may control the direction. They sometimes decide the direction of a project just because they are considered as influence people by others. Their opinions will carry on without further discussions, and others' people opinion will be ignored. At the end, if the project fails, the blame would be placed on all members of the group. So working as group will not generate more far-reaching result as the passage persists.

To sum up, the contents in the reading are jeopardized by the speaker and the lecturer has completely different points about the topic,

prodliu

Recently, some firms plan to offer their employees a three-day work time instead of normal five days a week. Managers hold the philosophy that working three days a week can increase company profits, reduce employees workload and change unemployment situation. However, I think that this plan is not gorgeous as people believe, and three arguments stated below to substantiate my point.

First of all, the plan will force company to spend more, because the same mount of work is distributed to employees who work three days a week will as a result need more people involved in company, and adding new employees means more money to invest. Additionally, the company needs to provide extra training programs to help new employees adapt to job as soon as possible, let alone the medical benefits and the cost office spaces and computers. All of these additional expenditures will cut the profits.

Moreover, the majority of socialists believe this plan will eventually reduce unemployment rates. They think that less work time may create more available jobs, and thus more workers are needed. However, these people who hold optimistic attitude to the plan ignore an alternative for the company. The employers would ask their employees to work overtime in order to make up different. This would pose a great threat to job pleasant and do nothing to solve unemployment problem.

Admittedly, asking people to work three days will definitely provide employees more free times, they can spend more time with their families such as traveling abroad with wife and children. Cutting off work time is not, however, the only approach possible.

Finally, working three days will lower the quality of life, rather than improve it. Working time shorter can reduce employee jobs’ stability, which would harm their chances for a job promotion. And they are more likely to be the first to lose jobs during an economic downtown or financial crisis, because the company prefers to retain five days employees in management position for ensure continuous coverage and consistent supervision.

To sum up, I am inclined to work five days a week to keep my professional skills and push me forward.

prodliu

313 综合

The lecturer holds different opinions about the dinosaurs and challenges the facts that dinosaurs are endothermy. To substantiate her theory, she points out three reasons.

First of all, there are some other ways for Polar dinosaurs to live through the cold weather. The speaker points out the weather in the period when dinosaurs appeared may be warmer than it is today. Even though the weather is harsh, dinosaurs might migrate to other warmer regions or just hibernate during the cold weather. Therefore the professor disagrees with what stated in the passage that the finding of fossils in polar region means dinosaurs are endothermy.

Moreover, there is another explanation for the leg position.  Although dinosaurs have legs underneath their bodies, it cannot prove they are endothemy.  On the other hand, the leg position could be a possibility to support the huge weight of dinosaurs and not a connection between dinosaurs and endothermy.

Furthermore, the professor admits that dinosaurs indeed have a bone structure called Haversian canals, which is a characteristic of endothermy. However, they also have growth rings on bones. These rings suggest the period when dinosaurs grew up, and abundant of evidences show that the growth rings stop growing or just grow slower during a cold climate. Thus, the bone structure cannot prove the dinosaurs are endothermy.

To sum up, the professor totally disagrees with the facts narrated in the passage by giving reasons to buttress her idea that dinosaurs are not tndothermy.

jasonliu119

Recent years, there is a weird phenomenon that when people making friends sometimes they depend on wealth(financial situation). They have a general theory that the rich only can make friends with some one who have equal status and wealth, or even have more money. As far as I am concerned, two people can be good friends no matter who is rich,（改为despite of the financial situation吧，凭语感） because good friends are linked not by money, but by their interests, goals and virtues.

First and foremost, it is universally acknowledge（被动） that good friends or closed friends （取一个就可以了吧，有点罗嗦）must have interests in common, it（断句，改为It，或者用which，变从句） is a crucial bond between two people. They can share the same sports, music and films, and their relationships will improved and be intimated（become intimated） during conversations or talking. Taking my own experience for example, （感觉这里有个祈使句好吧，否则根据语法，take的主语就是Damon了）Damon is my best friend, and we have been good friends since we were kids. Because we both love soccer, we often together to see games at stadium on weekends, and（断句） after that we talk our feelings about the display and share our views on the team we both support, that is really a effective way to improve our friendship and make us better know about each other. Therefore, money cannot bring two people together, interests can（用个强调句吧，it is interest that。。。rather than money）

eover, I think the most important quality of good friends is loyalty, which means he is always being honest to you and staying right beside you. Your friends can share not only your happiness, but also your sorrows. Sometimes, your friends can help you overcome frustrations and tough tasks. Examples abound in society, when Steve Jobs came back to Apple, his company was in a difficult situation, and he needed supports to reconstruct the company. Many of his friends immediately did their utmost to offer help to Steve, and finally make Apple back to prosperity. I believe Steve’s friends will not consider whether he is a richman, 这里要断句they trust him and have faith that he can build one of the greatest companies all over the world, and of course Steve did. So, friends need loyalty, not money.（总结句不够有力啊。改为What true friendship need is loyaty, not money.)

ur friends is rich, it could be good news for you, because it means that he could offer you financial assistant when you need help. Just as the old saying goes that a friend indeed is a friend in need, your friend must think you trustworthy or he will not lent money to you. However, only treat wealthy as the most significant standard while choosing friends is not wise decision.(这里举个例子吧，说某年某月你有同学病了，然后大家捐款、、、、）

y, friend is not your ATM, friend is a person who you can learn from. I am willingly to make friends with someone who is well-experienced of life, so many of my friends are seniors. I could listen to their life stories and absorb experiences, and I value these things as my lifelong treasures. （个人感觉你列了四个主体段，最后两个不够有力；还不如你写三个有力、例证充分的主体段）

In conclusion, two people can be good friends as long as they share the same interests, value the same criteria of life and hold the same perspective of issues.

好了，以上就是我的评价。总体语言流畅，理由提充分的。
特别注意断句的问题，一个句子除非用了从句，否则是绝对绝对不容许有两个主语的。（不要以为逗号在中间就可以了。） by Jason

Crystaljoy

Jason 昨天改了两篇哦，辛苦了辛苦了。奖励一只 ，里面装的110的成绩单。

Crystaljoy

3.13 独立修改
蓝色是你本来的，红色是我的感觉，黄色是精彩的~~~

Recently, some firms plan to offer their employees a three-day work time（scheme好一点吧） instead of normal five days a week. Managers hold the philosophy that working three days a week can increase company profits, reduce employees（’） workload and change unemployment situation (revert unemployment 感觉change有变好和变坏两种可能). However, I think that this plan is not gorgeous as people believe, and three arguments stated below to（will 不然是不是木有V了） substantiate my point.

First of all, the plan will force company to spend more, because the same mount of work（+which 不然这句是run-on吧, work is distributed…work will need…） is distributed to employees who work three days a week will as a result need more people involved in company (as a result.用在句尾通顺一点。我只见过as a result of 用在句中，但是是“由于”的意思), and adding new employees means more money（capital） to invest. Additionally, the company needs to provide extra training programs to help new employees adapt to job as soon as possible, let alone the medical benefits and the cost（costly） office spaces and computers (facilities. 感觉office space 跟office facility 在一起更般配，都比较范). All of these additional expenditures will cut the (overall) profits.(Good point !!!)

Moreover, the majority of socialists believe(+that 哈哈跟我一样) this plan will eventually reduce unemployment rates. They think that less work time may create more available jobs, and thus more workers are needed.（这是承上？干嘛用moreover） However, these people who hold optimistic attitude to（toward） the plan ignore an alternative for the company. (.改成----或者：)The employers would ask their employees to work overtime in order to make up different (?). This would pose a great threat to job pleasant (comfort) and do nothing to solve unemployment problem.

Admittedly, asking people to work three days will definitely provide employees more free times（time 那个times是”次数”）,(+as 加个连词连接两个句子就行) they can spend more time with their families such as traveling abroad with wife and children. Cutting off（删去）work time is not, however, the only approach possible.（我发现我俩写作风格有点像吧，总有承让对方的段子。建议你这里再具体讲一个alternative，而且可转移到倒数第二段）

Finally, working three days will lower the quality of life, rather than improve it. Working time shorter（Shorter working time） can reduce employee jobs’stability (employee’s job stability大部分情况下，只有有生命的东西的所有格才’s，其他用of那种。这里我觉得job stability间可不用), which would harm their chances for a job promotion. And they are more likely to be the first to lose jobs（be laid off 看job看腻了，来点变化）during an economic downtown（turndown/recession 哈哈好搞笑） or financial crisis, because the company prefers to retainfive days employees (感觉ambiguity，这个大定语我也不太确定，乱造的) in management position for（to） ensure continuous coverage（看不懂好抽象啊） and consistent supervision.

To sum up, I am inclined to work five days a week to keep（sharpen） my professional skills and push me forward.（这里谁push你了,不雅。be motivated to work even better.）



我读着你的文字就像读我自己写的一样。。。让我自恋一下。。其实主要是观点相似，结构相似，甚至有些词的选择都一样。
你的句子一般比较长，注意不要run-on了。楼上Jason建议的挺好。

Crystaljoy

啊，回来了。刚意识到综合也是我改你的。

Crystaljoy

啊！你综合写的神马？
3月13日  TPO3