Emily的作文楼

loverony713

TPO 24 综合 【生物的感觉好难 第一次看阅读跑题 该打 听力也不是听得很好】

The reading passage indicates that the material inside T. rex’s leg bone seems to be remains of blood vessels, red blood cells, and collagen matrix.However, the professor says the finding is skeptical.

First, the reading says the presence of a substance inside channels is the indication of remains of the blood vessels. However, the professor refutes that the soft organic substances are not the remains of the blood vessels. Those substances are actually soft residue made by bacteria, which once colonized in the channel.

Second, the reading says that the presence of sphere could be the remains of red blood cells. However, the professor argues that the spheres also appeared in primitive animals’ fossils which did not include red blood cells, and the sphere may be other substances.

Third, the test showed that dinosaur leg bone contained collagen. However, the professor says finding collagen from an animal which lived 70 million years ago is contradicting the fact about how long collagen could alive. As a result, the collage may come from other much more recent sources.

chasedreamabc

The reading passage indicates that thematerial inside T. rex’s leg bone seems to be remains of blood vessels, redblood cells, and collagen matrix.However, the professor says the finding isskeptical.
PS:总述没有错误，稍微把分量倒置一下会更好，多写一些听力的句子
First, the reading says the presence of a substance inside channels is theindication of remains of the blood vessels. However, the professor refutes thatthe soft organic substances are not the remains of the blood vessels. Thosesubstances are actually soft residue made by bacteria, which once colonized inthe channel.

Second, the reading says that the presence of sphere could be the remains ofred blood cells. However, the professor argues that the spheres also appearedin primitive animals’ fossils which did not include red blood cells, and thesphere may be other substances. （pieces of reddish mineral）

Third, the test showed that dinosaur legbone contained collagen. However, the professor says finding collagen from ananimal which lived 70 million years ago is contradicting the fact about howlong collagen could alive. As a result, the collage may come from other muchmore recent sources. Probably the collagen may havecome from the skin of the researchers who are handling the bone.

chasedreamabc

People can take care of their family members in big cities better thanin the countryside.

Family provides the support and backbonethat everyone needs to feel accomplished, happy, and loved in life. Thus, familyis of great necessity in our life. Currently, urbanization has been exertingtremendous influence on people’s everyday life, especially for those settlingdown in big cities. From myperspective, individuals definitely have more chances to take care of familymembers in metropolis.

Initially,it is the medical system that has been playing a vital role in people’s qualityof life; obviously, alarge city is a place where people’s urgent medical needs could be answeredefficiently. Despite distinctive merits provided（provide） bythe countryside such as the fresh air and friendly neighbors, living in thatcondition means being far away from significant public places---hospital, movietheater, shopping mall to name few---which（where） offer great convenience to the family. Lastyear my grandma, who lived in a small village of Hebei Province, suddenly got the(a) heart attack at 11 pm（p.m.） with abrupt faint. Every second wasextremely valuable for the patient. When my grandpa got in touch with thehospital finally, he felt extremely anxious because the nurse said he(真正等救护车的应该是grandma，she) was obliged to wait the ambulanceat least 1 hour! Not only was the way from county to village very far, but alsothe rigid（可以说人，规则rigid，道路可以用muddy或者miry） road was verydifficult to drive in the evening. Although my grandma was out of woods eventually,the inconvenience of living in rural areas cannot be neglected. Indeed, thereare emergent times when a family member might become seriously ill, and in thiscase you certainly would not wait for the next week and see what could happen.For that matter, it makes sense living in a city so as to ensure that the oldand the young in the family should be under proper medical protection in time.After all, you wish to take better care of your family members, don't you?

Inaddition, there is no denying that metropolis can provide better education forchildren. In big cities, schools are filledwith high-tech equipment（+s） such as projector（+s） and laboratory equipment（+s）, which, I have to say, cannot be found inschools from rural area. For example, in my history class, Professor Sam, whodoes not read book rigidly（照本宣科：echo what the books

say 或者改下句子，he does not follow the script. 后一种说法我在wall street journal 见过 ） but showsus precious documentary film like European Renaissance. Furthermore he has shownvarious PowerPoints including pictures of historical events, like the WorldWar, helping students to remember the time and events precisely. Besides, thereare lots of methods for teachers to enhance the level of teaching in largecities, such as increasing training institutions, more seminars and moreopportunities to study abroad. Nonetheless, those opportunities are seldom inthe countryside because of poverty, leading to the fact that student’s learningright is deprived to a large extent.

In a nutshell, nothing can be compared tothe benefits that a big city has to offer for your family members, if onlyreferring to health care and quality education. People can take care of familymembers better in a large city.

每段结束能再点一下题，尤其是第二点，把题目观点再抄一遍显得会更加完整。另外第二个论据你用对比方式来展现，但是农村如何差体现性上不足

loverony713

chasedreamabc 发表于 2014-9-16 11:52
People can take care of their family members in big cities better thanin the countryside.
Family pro ...

ps我在word上用equipmentS 加S显示错误！~ 所以好像是单复同形耶~~！！！

chasedreamabc

loverony713 发表于 2014-9-16 14:46
ps我在word上用equipmentS 加S显示错误！~ 所以好像是单复同形耶~~！！！

我查了一下《简明英汉字典》上面复数是+s的
回避这点可以用
facilities

loverony713

9-15 作文 Parents should allow their children to make mistakes and let them learn from their own mistakes

第三段在论述方面添加了几句别人的好句纸....希望改的小伙伴也能从中有所收获~~

loverony713

chasedreamabc 发表于 2014-9-16 15:02
我查了一下《简明英汉字典》上面复数是+s的
回避这点可以用
facilities

gooda！~~~ 么么哒！！3Q

loverony713

TPO 25 综合
The reading passage says it is unlikely that the vessels were used as electric batteries in ancient time. However, the professor indicates that all the reasons are not convincing.

First, the reading says the vessels have not been attached to some electricity conductors such as metal wires and as a result, they were not used as batteries. However, the professor refutes that it is local people who discovered those vessels, and they was not trained as professional as archaeologists. There were other materials near the location but the local people did not recognized them. Also, those materials may be overlooked. Some people even threw them away.

Second, the reading says the copper cylinders look exactly like those discovered in Seleucia where copper cylinders were used for holding scrolls instead of generating electricity. However, the professor refutes that those cylinders may originally be used as holding scrolls, but later they were used as batteries. People may find that by using the copper cylinders with iron rod and liquid, they could produce electricity. As a result, the copper were used for another purpose and the ancient batteries were first made.

Third, the reading implies ancient people have nothing to do with the electricity that generated by vessels. However, the professor argues that people would get a sensation of shock by touching the vessel, and some people used the vessel to convince other people that they have magical power. Furthermore, the current can be used to heal people and they could be used to stimulate mussel to relieve the pain. Morden doctors also use that method to cure patients.

sigrid_shan

加油喵喵

sigrid_shan

The reading passage says it is unlikely that the vessels were (says the vessels were unlikely to be) used as electric batteries in ancient time. However, the professor indicates that all the reasons are not convincing.

First, the reading says the vessels have not been attached to some electricity conductors such as metal wires and as a result（that’s to say/ it proves that…as a result在此不太合适）, they were not used as batteries. However, the professor refutes that it is local people who discovered those vessels, and they was not trained as professional as archaeologists. There were other materials near the location but the local people did not recognized them. Also, those materials may be overlooked. Some people even threw them away.

Second, the reading says（虽说综合写作不考语言还是稍微换个词嘛么么大） the copper cylinders look exactly like those discovered in Seleucia where copper cylinders were used for holding scrolls instead of generating electricity. However, the professor refutes that those cylinders may originally be used as holding scrolls, but later they were used as batteries. People may find that by using the copper cylinders with iron rod and liquid, they could produce electricity. As a result, the copper were used for another purpose and the ancient batteries were first made.

Third, the reading implies ancient people have nothing to do with（这个表达的意思似乎是与…没关系，不是拿啥没用） the electricity that generated by vessels. However, the professor argues that people would get a sensation of shock by touching the vessel, and some people used the vessel to convince other people that they have magical power. Furthermore, the current can be used to heal people and they could be used to stimulate mussel to relieve the pain. Morden doctors also use that method to cure patients.