刺猬加入『写作小分队』 真心想改掉拖延症 要坚持

Herisson0509

To  喵~~~ 谢谢你好心的建议 我下次避免

daisyの小夢想

TPO8 综合

The lecture apparently disputes the points illustrated in the readingmaterial. According to the passage, many critics suggests that itwas not real that the events distored by Chevalier in his memoir.(the eventswere distorted by Chevalier in his memoir) However, the lecturestates that although no memoir can possibly be correct in every detail details, but the Chevalier’s memoir is accurate overall due to the reliable sources.

First of all, the professor claims that Chevalier had so much wealth thathe could spend lots of money on parties and gambling. The reason why heborrowed money from the merchant is that he sold first thenwaited money to arrive after a few days. (he sold first是什么意思?? theChevalier was rich in assets but poor in cash while he was living in Switzerland,he occasionally had to borrow funds to pay for expensive recreationalactivities)This(Borrowing money) does not mean he ispoor. In contrast, the reading passage points out that he was poor because heoften borrowed money. So the lecture totally disagrees with the view made inthe reading passage.

Second, the passage demonstrates thatit is impossible to capture the conversation talked(taken) many years ago. In the lecture, theprofessor admits when Chevalier met Voltaive, he wrote down what he couldremember about the conversation immediately each night. So later the notesbecame the important source of his menoir(memoir).

Finally, the passage raises the issue that Chevalier offer a bribe toprison jailers so that he could escaped from the notorious prison. Theprofessor opposes to the writer's expectation. He asserts thatthose prisoners recognized more powerful friends were not able to bribe tofreedom. The good evidence of he escaped by himself is that the governmentdocuments about an old prison room repaired,Chevalier’s room(about the repairing note of the ceiling of Chevalier’s room ), which indicates that exactly he did as (+what) he said, content that explicitly contradicts that passage.

In conclusion, compared with the author, the lecturer gives contradictoryopinions concerning the accuary(accuracy) of the memoir wrote by Chevalier.

刺猬写到的细节比我多呢，最后那段bribed his way out of a prison这个细节我好像听漏了，总体很不错哇~

Herisson0509

4.15 tpo11

The lecture apparently disputes the points illustrated in the reading material. According to the passage, young people spent less time on reading literature-novels, plays, poems than used to do has unfortunate effects for the reading public for the culture and the literature. However, yet none of them regared in the eye of the lecture.

First of all, the professor claims that a book does not have to be literature to be stimulating, science and history reading, but they often are high quality. This kinds of books can just be creative as novels and plays, they also stimulate imagination. Do not think that not reading literature doen not mean not reading a good book. In contrast, the reading passage points out that less reading books are likely sharp for literature. So the lecture totally disagrees with the view made in the reading passage.

Second, the passage demonstrates that people perfer to television instead of reading literature lowered the level of culture. In the lecture, the professor admits culture is changing, there are many available forms. And some of these creative forms speak more directly than literature does.

Finally, the passage raises the issue that the reading of literature is likely to decline because of poor readers. The professor opposes to the writer's expectation. He asserts that it's probably true that there's less support for literature today than in earlier generations, but do not blame on readers. Because a lot of modern literature is intended to be difficult to understand, content that explicitly contradicts that passage.

晨依Jacqueline

4.15 tpo11 修改

The lecture apparently disputes the points illustrated in the reading material. According to the passage, young people spent less time on reading literature-novels, plays, poems than used to do has unfortunate effects for the reading public for the culture and the literature. However, yet none of them regared(regard) in the eye of the lecture.(感觉好像和主题不是很近?Main topic--文学作品阅读量的减少对于读者、文化和文学的发展都是有害的.)

First of all, the professor claims that a book does not have to be literature to be stimulating,science and history reading, but they often are high quality.(这个句子写的怪怪的，而且意思也怪怪的。) This kinds of books can just be creative as novels and plays, they also stimulate imagination. Do not think that(刺猬要注意一下哦、即使是lecture里面这么说了也要转换一下，不要这么实心眼直接就写个祈使句来。) not reading literature doen(does) not mean not reading a good book. In contrast, the reading passage points out that less reading books are likely(+to) sharp for (?)literature. So the lecture totally disagrees with the view made in the reading passage.


Second, the passage demonstrates that people perfer(prefer) to television instead of reading literature lowered the level of culture. In the lecture, the professor admits (+that) culture is changing, there are many available forms. And some of these creative forms speak more directly than literature does.(我觉得好像细节没有听出来，有点superficial有木有、、、)


Finally, the passage raises the issue that the reading of literature is likely to decline because of poor readers. The professor opposes to the writer's expectation.He(哇哇我肿么记得是she?不知道这个有木有影响~~) asserts that it's probably true that there's less support for literature today than in earlier generations, but do not blame on readers. Because a lot of modern literature is intended to be difficult to understand, content that explicitly contradicts that passage.


刺猬的模板用的真心好，一下子给文章提亮了不少！

但是个人的内容也要加强一下哦，感觉好像理解上出了点小问题吧，影响到听力了，观点和细节部分都需要再仔细听听，总结一下~还有句式上有几个感觉写的不太认真，晨依想说不要因为题目的理解上偏差或者听力听得不是很懂而影响心情哈、加油哦！

Herisson0509

4.19 TPO15
sorry 婷婷 交太晚了  

The lecture apparently refutes the points illustrated in the reading material. According to the professor, a large cane toad population now threatens small native animals that are not pests but several measures have been proposed to stop the spread of the cane toad in Australia. On the contrary, the reading contends an opposite stand that these measures are likely to be unsuccessful for damaging cane toads.

The first point the professor uses to cast doubt on the reading is that the fense is unlikely effective to prevent the spread of the cane toads. Because the young toads are found in streams, the water can carry them to the other side, so the population can increase on the other side, which differs from the statement in the reading that build a national fence is one way to prevent the spread of the toad.

Another evidence the speaker adopts to contradict the passage is that those untrained volunteers would destroy many of Australia’s native frogs, s
ome of which are dangerous. However, the reading states that the toads could be captured and destroyed by volunteers.

In the conclusion, the point made in the lecture contrasts with what is presented in the reading. As the professor claims, using the virus is a bad idea because it could have terrible consequences for cane toads, the virtus can cause ecological disaster, as cane toad are native speices, so the whole ecosystem will suffer. Whereas the reading material holds that the disease-causing virus can control the cane toad populations and only harm cane toads.

婷婷connie

4.19 tpo15 改

嘻嘻，改好啦


The lecture apparently refutes the points illustrated in the reading material. According to the professor, a large cane toad population now threatens small native animals that are not pests（这句话可以不用写了吧，感觉重点就是在解决方案可不可行上） but several measures have been proposed to stop the spread of the cane toad in Australia. On the contrary, the reading contends an opposite stand that these measures are likely to be unsuccessful for damaging cane toads.

The first point the professor uses to cast doubt on the reading is that the fense(fence)is unlikely effective to prevent the spread of the cane toads. Because the young toads （and eggs）are found in streams, the water can carry them to the other side, so the population can increase on the other side, which differs from the statement in the reading that build a national fence is one way to prevent the spread of the toad.

Another evidence the speaker adopts to contradict the passage is that those untrained volunteers would destroy many of Australia’s native frogs, some of which are dangerous.(在这加一句，他们不会区分cane toad and native frog更好)However, the reading states that the toads could be captured and destroyed by volunteers.

In the conclusion, the point made in the lecture contrasts with what is presented in the reading. As the professor claims, using the virus is a bad idea because it could have terrible consequences for cane toads, the virtus can cause ecological disaster, as cane toad are native speices(species), so the whole ecosystem will suffer. Whereas the reading material holds that the disease-causing virus can control the cane toad populations and only harm cane toads.



Conclusion：herisson写的很不错啦，

1.句式多变，听力基本到位，

2.第二点的细节还有再扣一下，

3.第一段开始的时候直接把矛盾说出来就行，

4.字数通常保持在300左右最宜，herisson可以再扩充一点，尤其是第二点。

Herisson0509

4.21 TPO17
额 很崩溃 听力3遍写下来的 太差劲了
The lecture apparently refutes the points illustrated in the reading material. According to the passage, the number of birds in the United States will necessarily decline due to the steady growth of the human population and the corresponding increase in agriculture and pesticide.
However, yet none of them regarded in the eye of the lecture.


The first point the professor uses to cast doubt on the reading is that urban development actually provides better and larger habitats for other types birds. Even birds can now be found in cities ,so it’s not going to decline bird populations in the future. Some populations may shrink, but others will grow, which differs from the statement in the reading that birds' natural habitats will continue to disappear because human populations and settlements continue to expand.



Another evidence the speaker adopts to contradict the passage is in the United States
, less and less land is being used for agriculture every year. And more productive varieties of crops produce more food, so there’s no need to destroy wilderness areas. However, the reading states that the growth of agriculture will result in the further destruction of bird habitats.


In the conclusion, the point made in the lecture contrasts with what is presented in the reading. As the professor claims, now two changes have occurred. First, new and much less  poisonous pesticides have been developed, and that’s important. Second, there is a growing trend to develop more crops that are designed to be unattractive to pests. Pest crops don’t harm birds at all. Whereas the reading material holds that pesticides are poisons designed to kill agricultural and home garden pests, such as insects, but inevitably can harm birds.

Herisson0509

4.22综合 TPO18
The lecture apparently refutes the points illustrated in the reading material. According to the passage, experts try to save Torreya in three ways.On the contrary, the professor contends none of them can be effective solution.

The first point the professor uses to cast doubt on the reading is that it is unlikely successful reestablish Torreya in the same location. The global warming strongly affects the climate in the regions, the temperature are increasing, and the climate in Northern Florida is becoming drier, which differs from the statement in the reading that scientists worked to plant Torreya seeds in the coolest, dampest areas of the microclimate.

Another evidence the speaker adopts to contradict the passage is the black trees srread so quickly and killed many plants in a new environment, some of them are becoming extinct. However, the reading states that move Torreya to an entirely different location can help it to survive.

In the conclusion, the point made in the lecture contrasts with what is presented in the reading. As the professor claims, it is not easy to preserve Torreya in research centers. Torreya trees are not be able to resist diseases.so the research simply not keep Torreya for a long term, whereas the reading material holds that scientists can conduct a research to ensure the continued survival of Torreya .

婷婷connie

4.22 综合改文
4.22综合 TPO18
The lecture apparently refutes the points illustrated in the reading material. According to the passage, experts try to save Torreya in three ways.On the contrary, the professor contends none of them can be effective solutions.

The first point the professor uses to cast doubt on the reading is that it is unlikely successful(to)reestablish Torreya in the same location. The global warming strongly affects the climate in the regions, the temperature are increasing, and the climate in Northern Florida is becoming drier, which differs from the statement in the reading that scientists worked to plant Torreya seeds in the coolest, dampest areas of the microclimate.

Another evidence the speaker adopts to contradict the passage is the black trees srread(spread)so quickly and killed many （native）plants in a new environment, some of them are becoming (endangered and )extinct. (This exerts an obvious harm to the ecosystem)However, the reading states that move(moving) Torreya to an entirely different location can help it to survive.

In the conclusion, the point made in the lecture contrasts with(这个用过了，换成refutes) what is presented in the reading. As the professor claims(declares也可以的), it is not easy to preserve (a large population of)Torreya in research centers. Torreya trees are not be able to resist diseases.so the research simply not keep Torreya for a long term, whereas the reading material holds that scientists can conduct a research to ensure the continued survival of Torreya .

Conclusion: herisson的句式多变，基本上都出来了，不过听力的细节还要抓住些，写完之后一定要多检查哦

Herisson0509

4.29 TPO1
The lecture apparently disputes the points illustrated in the reading material. According to the passage, the policy that companies tend to offer their employees the option of working a four-day workweek for less pay would benefit the economy as a whole as well as the individual companies and the employees. However, yet none of them regared in the eye of the lecture.



First of all, the professor claims that hiring more a four-day workweek employees will spent the company a lot. Because company should put much money on training and providing more spaces and equipments for staffs, which will cut into their profits. In contrast, the reading passage points out that the shortened workweek would increase company profits. So the lecture totally disagrees with the view made in the reading passage.



Second, the passage demonstrates that one of the primary benefits of offering this option to employees is that it would reduce unemployment rates. In the lecture, the professor admits many job will be available, the company will ask the four-day workweek workers work over time to make ddifference. They expect the shortened workweek staffs can do the same as the five-days workers usually do.



Finally, the passage raises the issue that the option of a four-day workweek would be better for individual employees. The professor opposes to the writer's expectation. He asserts that less pay will reduce the quailty of their life, and the short time work will decrease the better job oppourtnity, even lose job. Usually company prefers to offer the five- day workweek employees a chance of promotion because they need long-time workers supervise the company, content that explicitly contradicts that passage.



In conclusion, the point made in the lecture contracts with what is presented in the reading material.