晨依小超人的写作贴，欢迎拍砖！

Herisson0509

我的高亮你以后就不用打了 反正也少的可怜 尽量都找我的错误就行了 呼呼 我现阶段也只能追求错误少了

首先赞下晨依30min能打那么多字我好慢的愁苦

As we all know that parents are children's first and best teachers. However, how to be a good teacher and educate children properly has become a troublesome issue to many of the parents. Just take one topic, for example, should parents help their children do their work or encourage their children to do the work on their own? From my point of view, the better answer is the latter option.

To begin with, it is essential for parents to encourage their children to manage their work by themselves because children may benefit a lot from it. That is to say, by working out a difficult question, a child is able to acquire various abilities such as analyzing data, gathering information and so on. To a very large extent can children improve their capabilities of settling problems in many aspects in their future study.To a large extent, the capability of settling problems can be beneficial to children's future study.On the contrary, suppose a child has the hard problem solved with the help of his parents, suppose that if parents always help their children to solve the problems, childrenhe will again be unable to work out similar problems by his own or even losing lose谓语还是前面的will呢his independent thinking ability, which which引导非限制定语从句好像不能指代整个句子吧is crucial to a child's mental development.

In addition, the encouragement from parents to ask children doing their school work on their own is an initial element of chidlren's growth.the encouragement that parents provide to children is an initial element of chidlren's growth. Not only will this encouragement broaden children's horizons, but it may also inspire children's creativity. For instance, Watt was criticized by his auntie as a lazy boy when he was discovering the mystery of steam power, and this discouragement really depressed the child's learning activity. Fortunately, he was encouraged by his father to do research on this new discovery and finally succeeded in inventing the steam engine, which pushed the world first industrial revolution. From Watt's case, we can obviously draw a conclusion that parents have the responsibility to encourage their children working to work on their own and find something new instead of doing all things for them.

Admittedly, parents sometimes could give their children useful advice when they are dealing with dilemma because they are more mature and experienced. However, several "golden rules" are now out-of-date and could not well solve the current questions. To demonstrate this, I will discusse(discuss) my real experience. Once my mother helped me overcomed(overcome) a very hard problem using with her knowledge, but it was proved totally wrong by my teacher and this did disappointed me. From then on, my mother has realized that she ought to encourage me to work out the difficult problems rather than finishing the assignments by her effort. Hence, to help children doing their works sometimes could even hurt their feelings has a negative effect.

To sum, it is better for parents to instruct their children doingto do their work own on their own rather than working out the difficultiesin place of them.in place of 用在这里不合适help them to do work. Under this instructions, I firmly believe that parents could educate their children more excellently and provide great help to their children in their growth, children’s growth.



结构内容都不错瑕疵是有些语法问题没有注意到我觉得应该是赶时间的原因

亲爱的加油

晨依Jacqueline

5月7日 独立
As an old saying goes that a friend in need is a friend indeed, some people regard whether or not they could get help from others when they are in trouble as a criteria of choosing friends. I, however, believe that it is better to choose a firend(friend) with whom I can have fun with.

To begin with, no one could deny that a humorous person is more welcomed by others. That is to say, if we make acquaintance with a person who is always bringing laughters to us, not only can we turn a bad mood into a positive one, but we can also get to know many other people and make friends with them. Therefore, everytime we are trapped in troubles, more people are willing to help us. In comparison, if we only make friends with those who can give us assistance when we have difficulties, we possibly will lose the laughters and a larger interpersonal circles that a funny friend could bring to us.

Subsequently, a friend who is always making me laugh tends to have a positive attitude toward life. My best friend Sara is good at sharing interesting experience and jokes with me. Abundant laughters as she brings to my life, I learn to cope all the obstacles in my way with an optimistic attitude from her. Once I confronted with an unexpected failure in my examinations, depressed and some kind of desperate, I couldn't help crying day by day. Fortunately, Sara companied me and told me some stories both from her own life and some books, from her interesting stories I managed to get rid of my disappointment and decided to work more diligently to welcome the next success. It was Sara who can affect me with her smile and humor that helped me overcome the difficulties in my life.

In the end, difficulties are only a small part of our life, but I couldn't bear to live a life without laughters. As far as I am concerned, a laughter is to life what salt is to dishes. With laughters, I can relax myself from stress; with laughters, I can keep myself energetic to do everything; also with laughters, I can have my feelings expressed to others better. Though Sara is not helpful enough with my academic performance, she is of significant help in moving away all my troubles and tiredness, and thus encourage me with her optimism to endeavor. I think she is a real friend that I have to cherish.

In sum, considering all the above-mentioned reasons, we can safely arrive at a conclusion that people who can share happiness and laughters with us are worth making friends with. I bet we can benefit a lot from those funny friends.

晨依Jacqueline

To 刺猬~
谢谢亲爱的~么么╭(╯3╰)╮
看来我的语法真是弱爆了哇，G的时候会很吃亏的哇

晨依Jacqueline

5.8 独立写作
Parents are children's first and best teachers. Some people believe that children should choose the same career as their parents. I, however, vote against this idea.

Priorly, children should pick a piece of job that really suits them. Opposed to what many parents think that children are bound to choose a job which has both high social status and decent salaries, a few experts point out that it is more critical for children to choose a job that matches their education levels, working abilities and so on. For instance, the son of my father's colleague once took a piece of job as an accountant working in the Bank of China. Though his father performed excellent on working, he lived up to his father's expectations with a poor working skills and caused quite a few mistakes in work. Since he could not perform as well as his father did, he failed to pass the trail.

Subsequently, major is another factor that should be taken into consideration when hunting jobs. In other words, children should look for jobs that are relevant to what they learned in universities. Despite that the son of my father's colleague is a post-graduate student majored in marketing from a national key university, he knew too little about the daily operations in the bank systems. Additionally, he felt depressed as well because he couldn't understand the accountant work and his academic performance was of no use dealing with his current work. In comparision(comparison), choosing a work which has a relationship with marketing may be more beneficial to him.

What's more, the interest of children should not be neglected, either. For example, I have dreamed of being a teacher sharing knowledge with children who are in remote areas since I was in middle school. But I was forced to choose finance as my major in college becasue(because) my parents expected me to work in national banks as they did. With no interest or passion in economics, I chose to sleep in every class and got only very low GPA in my grade in my first year in college. From my own experience, obviously we can see it is essential for children to do what they like rather than conpelling(compelling) them to like what they do.    

In summary, due to the above-mentioned resons(reasons), we could safely arrive at a conclusion that it is cruicial(crucial) for children to choose their jobs according to their interests, their majors and some other factors instead of copying a career which is totally the same with their parents. In this case will children live a happy life.

包子不包子

As an old saying goes that a friend in need is a friend indeed, some people regard whether or not they could get help from others when they are in trouble as a criteria of choosing friends. I, however, believe that it is better to choose a firend(friend) with whom I can have fun with.（第一段简洁直接 很好啊）

To begin with, no one could deny that a humorous person is more welcomed by others. That is to say, if we make acquaintance with a person who is always bringing laughters to us, not only can we turn a bad mood into a positive one, but we can also get to know many other people and make friends with them. Therefore, everytime we are trapped in troubles, more people are willing to help us（感觉US 可以去掉）. In comparison, if we only make friends with those who can give us assistance when we have difficulties, we possibly will lose the laughters and a larger interpersonal circles that a funny friend could bring to us.

Subsequently, a friend who is always making me laugh tends to have a positive attitude toward life.（感觉这句话有些表意不明啊) My best friend Sara is good at sharing interesting experience and jokes with me (有些奇怪的说 可以换一个说法）. Abundant laughters as she brings to my life, I learn to cope with all the obstacles in my way with an optimistic attitude learn from her. Once I confronted with an unexpected failure in my examinations, depressed and some kind of desperate, I couldn't help crying day by day. Fortunately, Sara companied me and told me some stories both from her own life and some books, from(和manage 搭配不大对啊） her interesting stories I managed to get rid of my disappointment and decided to work more diligently to welcome the next success. It was Sara who can affect me with her smile and humor that helped me overcome the difficulties in my life.

In the end, difficulties are only a small part of our life, but I couldn't bear to live a life without laughters. As far as I am concerned, a laughter is to life what salt is to dishes 好～. With laughters, I can relax myself from stress; with laughters, I can keep myself energetic to do everything; also with laughters, I can have my feelings expressed to others better. Though Sara is not helpful enough with my academic performance, she is of significant help in moving away all my troubles and tiredness, and thus encourage me with her optimism to endeavor. I think she is a real friend that I have to cherish. （感觉有些突兀 能和前面那句话和到一起就好了）

In sum, considering all the above-mentioned reasons, we can safely arrive at a conclusion that people who can share happiness and laughters with us are worth making friends with. I bet we can benefit a lot from those funny friends.

看完之后发现 我真的不会找错误 没有帮什么忙 实在不好意思
看了美国人写的185 彻底颠覆了我理解 ...
感觉晨依的文章条理清晰 比我好好多... 长短句结合 读起来明了 蛮好蛮好 继续努力哈～~
另外 发现晨依不是每段都有例子 想问一下 是不是例子是每段的必要呢？谢谢哦～

晨依Jacqueline

“看完之后发现 我真的不会找错误 没有帮什么忙 实在不好意思
看了美国人写的185 彻底颠覆了我理解 ...
感觉晨依的文章条理清晰 比我好好多... 长短句结合 读起来明了 蛮好蛮好 继续努力哈～~
另外 发现晨依不是每段都有例子 想问一下 是不是例子是每段的必要呢？谢谢哦～ ”
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谢谢包子的修改建议！
我最近看xdf发的那本机经上老外写的作文感觉和我们平时自己所想所写都有一些差异，很想向那个方面靠拢，却害怕写得又不伦不类。。。其实关于例子，我个人观点是一段一个的，毕竟要有details来support观点的吧，但是有的时候真的举不出来，所以我就写了个对比的来应付，我也不知道是不是可以这样用呢，你再问问大神们吧~~

晨依Jacqueline

TPO10 综合写作
Both the reading passage and the lecture discuss the reason why the population of sea otters along the coast of Alaska has decreased. The reading gives the credence to the pollution theory; meanwhile, the professor provides evidence supporting the predator hypothesis.

To begin with, the reading casts the fact that the chemical pollutions threaten the ability of sea otters to resist infections and thus lead to a decline in their population. In contrast, the lecturer mentions that no evidence shows sea otters dead on Alaska beaches are caused by infections in the water. Further, she disputes that other sea animals will die if the sea water is polluted. Therefore, she thinks the problem is better explained by the predator theory.

The next point demonstrated in the passage is that the only widely occurring predators-orca tend to hunt large animals instead of sea otters. However, the speaker states that the orcas have to change their diet to survive because the decline of whales owe to human hunting. According to the speaker, she points out smaller sea animals like sea lions, seals, and sea otters are all killed by the orcas, again proves the predator theory.

Finally, to counter the assertion of an uneven pattern of the decrease of population in Alaska locations, the professor mentions the fact that in places where large orcas are difficult to approach, for instance the shallow and rocky beaches, less decreased population appears. This fact strengthens the predator hypothesis.

In conclusion, while the author is in favor of the pollution theory for several reasons, the professor prefers the predator hypothesis and gives her own supporting details.

晨依Jacqueline

5月9日 独立写作
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? It is better for your friend to ask you for help (suppose you are good at the subject) than to turn to a tutor when he finds it hard to pass an examination.

As an old saying goes that a friend in need is a friend indeed. To be a good friend, I definitely agree with the statement that it is better for my friend to turn to me for help than asking a tutor when he has difficulties in passing an examination. My reasons are threefolded.

In the first place, turning to a tutor for help is less convenient. In other words, I, as a college student, have abundant free time to give him a hand assisting him with his examinations. However, as a professor or a teacher has his regular office hours, he is not available every time when my friend confronts a difficult problem. In addition, it is a rule that we students should make an appointment in advance when we have something emergency to meet the professor in my university. Under this circumstance, troubles or problems appeared in the text books could not be solved immediately. Because of that, one of my friend Helen is always willing to ask me for advice on her problems because we are roommates and she could get the solution within only a few minutes.

Subsequently, as a friend, I know my friend better than a tutor for sure. As a professor in a college has to teach a large number of students, it is impossible for him to know the exact level of their learning or the extent to their understanding of the terms and definitions. Taking this factor into consideration, I am able to get to know how my friend have mastered the knowledge he learned and what points on earth he didn't understand and then provide him special and precise solutions or suggestions for his preperations(preparations) for examinations.

Plus, students sometimes have to pay for the instruction of the tutors. In some offcampus classes, students are forced to prepare for the examinations by listening to a hired teacher and pay extra money for the classes. I do have attended that kind of class before, but disappointed by the quality of content of the lectures mede(made) by those so-called famous teachers. Hence, neither did I take part in such sort of class and asking for an unprofessional tutor to instruct me, nor did I suggested my friends to attend that class. To be honest, I can also provide my friend useful assistance for his examinations without any cost.

In summary, due to the above-mentioned reasons, we can easily arrive at a conclusion that if a friend have troubles in passing an examination, he should ask me for help instead of looking for a tutor. I bet, with my assistance he will pass the examination more easily.

IVY500

Both the reading passage and the lecture discuss the reason why the population of sea otters along the coast of Alaska has decreased. The reading gives the credence to the pollution theory; meanwhile, the professor provides evidence supporting the predator hypothesis.不一样的开头阿

To begin with, the reading casts the fact that the chemical pollutions threaten the ability of sea otters to resist infections and thus lead to a decline in their population. In contrast, the lecturer mentions that no evidence shows sea otters dead on Alaska beaches are caused by infections in the water. Further, she disputes that other sea animals will die if the sea water is polluted. Therefore, she thinks the problem is better explained by the predator theory.

The next point demonstrated in the passage is that the only widely occurring predators-orca tend貌似是tends吧？ to hunt large animals instead of sea otters. However, the speaker states that the orcas have to change their diet to survive because the decline of whales owe to human hunting. According to the speaker, she points out smaller sea animals like sea lions, seals, and sea otters are all killed by the orcas, again proves the predator theory.

Finally, to counter the assertion of an uneven pattern of the decrease of population in Alaska locations, the professor mentions the fact that in places where large orcas are difficult to approach, for instance the shallow and rocky beaches, less decreased population appears.(这里感觉有点问题啊…不知道对不对啊….) This fact strengthens the predator hypothesis.

In conclusion, while the author is in favor of the pollution theory for several reasons, the professor prefers the predator hypothesis and gives her own supporting details.



看了之后真不知道有什么错误啊~
这个综合写作还有细节要写吗？是不是每段都要写细节啊？第一次看这些啊
对不住啊晨依

IVY500

As an old saying goes that a friend in need is a friend indeed. To be a good friend, I definitely agree with the statement that it is better for my friend to turn to me for help than asking a tutor when he has difficulties in passing an examination（这里我觉得最好有点对题目的改写比较好吧）. My reasons are threefolded.应该直接是threefold吧

In the first place, turning to a tutor for help is less convenient. In other words, I, as a college student, have abundant free time to give him a hand assisting him with his examinations. However, as a professor or a teacher has his regular office hours, he is not available every time when my friend confronts a difficult problem. In addition, it is a rule that we students should make an appointment in advance when we have something emergency to meet the professor in my university. Under this circumstance, troubles or problems appeared in the text books could not be solved immediately. Because of that, one of my friend Helen is always willing to ask me for advice on her problems because we are roommates and she could get the solution within only a few minutes.

Subsequently, as a friend, I know my friend better than a tutor for sure. As a professor in a college has to teach a large number of students, it is impossible for him to know the exact level of their learning or the extent to their understanding of the terms and definitions. Taking this factor into consideration, I am able to get to know how my friend have mastered the knowledge he learned and what points on earth he didn't understand and then provide him special and precise solutions or suggestions for his preperations(preparations) for examinations.（感觉时态有点问题啊）

Plus, students sometimes have to pay for the instruction of the tutors. In some offcampus classes, students are forced to prepare for the examinations by listening to a hired teacher and pay extra money for the classes. I do have attended that kind of class before, but disappointed by the quality of content of the lectures mede(made) by those so-called famous teachers. Hence, neither did I take part in such sort of class and asking(这个地方用的是asking吗？) for an unprofessional tutor to instruct me, nor did Isuggested（suggest）my friends to attend that class. To be honest, I can also provide my friend useful assistance for his examinations without any cost.

In summary, due to the above-mentioned reasons, we can easily arrive at a conclusion that if a friend have troubles in passing an examination, he should ask me for help instead of looking for a tutor. I bet, with my assistance he will pass the examination more easily.


唉我实力不够啊~不知道还有哪些地方有错误没看出来~
感觉时态有的有点问题不知道是不是......还有有的单复数问题吧~其他的我看不出来了