9.10综合批改
The professor in the lecture refutes thethree theories in the reading passage explaining how the buildings were used forthe purposes of residential purpose, storing food supplies and ceremonialcenters and then states that none of them is convincing.（你的state应该是和refute并列，那么就是教授反对三个理论，认为它们不可信。而我写的是教授怀疑，然后反对。其实我觉得我们差不多，但都不算重复，你觉得呢？） In the beginning, it is mentioned by the reading passage that theappearance of the Chaco houses is similar to the well-known 'apartmentbuildings' which are used for living. However, the professor points out thatthere are a limited number of fire places for cooking inside the Chaco houses,rendering this residential theory dubious. For example, in one of the largest greathouses, the limited quantity of fire places can only be used for cooking for aroundten families, yet the house can accommodate more than a hundred families. Secondly, itin terms of the theory of storing food supplies, the professor states that thereisare not evidenceindicating many traces of maize or maize's containers have befound in the Chaco structures.（其实我觉得你这句话有点臃肿,你其实是从句套从句，但是看老美写的185篇作文那本书，外国人其实不太用从句的，用非谓语比较多） If the houses are used for storage of food supplies, more grainmaize, one of the maincrops of the Chaco people（插入语一般起强调作用，但是这个插入语其实是无用的信息你不觉得吗？）, and more big containers should have been found in the houses. Thirdly, although broken pots can do be found in the mound, othermaterials such as sand and stone as well as construction tools can also befound there. The professor says that it is highly likely that the mound is usedfor a land fill to store discarded construction materials, and pots ascontainers of meals were left there as well when workers finished their meals. 你基本功很好啊，如果还需要我提什么建议的话，我会建议你如果时间比较充足，每段后面在加个总结的句子，这样逻辑结构更完整，OG上的满分作文就是这样的，我以前看得高分模板也是。 | 
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发表于 2013-9-10 15:09:48
