求综合部分提高..Writing加油!!

阿伦艾弗森

The reading passage explores three ways to prevent Torreya from dying out. The professor’s lecture deals with the same issue. However, she thinks that none of these three solutions are satisfactory answers to the extinction problem of Torreya, which contradicts what thereading states. In the lecture, she uses three specific points to support her opinions.

To begin with, even though the reading passage suggests a solution of planting Torreya in the same location under its current microclimate condition, the professor argues in the lecture that the recovery of this species is unlikely to happen by this means. This is because the regarded ideal living condition of Torreya in this area is now affected by the climate of larger regions in Florida, which has an increase of overall temperature due to global warming. Moreover, many regions there are becoming drier, which means there is not anywhere in this original place suitable enough for Torreya to live.

Furthermore, despite the solution provided in the reading that Torreya can be moved to different places, or even far fromits Florida microclimate, the professor contends that there is another example of such kind of plant migration, which is to change black locust’s living location, and its consequences are really negative. Then she supports this view with the fact that as soon as black locusts arrived in the new place, it spread very quickly and killed trees in the new environment, which was also a species indanger(这句话最好放在trees后面), andit finally became extinct.（这个小句子可以独立出来，长句+短句的形式比较好） In other words, such sort of migration may lead to unexpected outcomes and cannot be considered as a solution.

Finally, the professor asserts that it is probably not a solution to raise Torreya in research centers, whereas the author of the reading claims that it can be a feasible way. The professor proves that this claim is indefensible by pointing out that relatively small population in research centers cannot resist diseases, as resistant species need to have genetic diversity. As a result, it is not a satisfactory answer as Torreya kept in research centers is not capable of surviving in long term. （还有一个小细节，就是research center 地方不够大……无法提供足够地方使多数量和多样的T树生存）

写的挺不错的。
写文章时注意长短句的结合会让文章更好~！

陈喵喵holdon

10.10综合TPO20   感觉信息的正确性还是有点玄,听力不好硬伤...

The reading passage explores the issue of why it is necessary to suppress natural forest fires. The professor’s lecture deals with the same issue. However, he thinks that such fires are natural and play roles in not only destructive but also creative ways, which contradicts what the reading states. Also, in the lecture, he uses three specific points to refute the reading passage.

To begin with, even though the reading suggests that trees and vegetations have been influenced a lot after the long-lasting forest fires in Yellowstone, the professor argues in the lecture that new plants have opportunities to grow as well as that trees and vegetation in Yellowstone have become more diverse since the fire. This is because plants that do not have chances to grow in the past are able to germinate, especially small plants, which had always developed in shadows. In addition, plants that are suitable in heated environments can live under that circumstance. Obviously, the professor’s argument disproves its counterpart in the reading.

Moreover, despite the statement in the reading that wildlife in the forest has suffered a lot during this forest fire,the professor contends that animals can also recover from the fire and have new opportunities to grow. Then he supports his idea with the fact that it is especially ideal for small animals such as rabbits to survive under conditions after the forest fire. Additionally, these animals’ predators can develop and result in stronger supply chains.

Finally, the professor asserts that the declining trend of tourism mentioned in the reading is under unusual conditions such as little rainfall and strong wind, whereas the author of the reading claims that the business which relies on tourism in the Yellowstone area suffer due to the decreasing of the park’s tourism attraction. The professor proves this claim to be indefensible by pointing out that such unusual weather conditions are not current senses. In other words, it never happens again and tourists come each year after that.

loveluyuanbai

陈喵喵holdon

10.10独立
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement: Movies are worthwatching only when they teach us something about the real life.

As the increase of movie industry recently, there are more people becoming interested in watching movies in their spare time. However, many people think it is only worth while watching movies which are meaningful for their lives. Otherwise it will be a waste of time. Personally,I do not agree with such view by holding the opinion that to watch all kinds ofmovies make sense to our lives.

To begin with, it is undeniable that watching movies can be a way of entertainment instead of necessarily being a method to learn something. In other words, we can have fun watching different kinds of movies, such as watching comedies. For example, recently I have watched a movie named ‘High Kick’, which was produced in Korea and contains many elements of humor. I laughed so often that I felt really happy when watching it. Moreover, though there are many daily activities which involve entertainment,watching movies is one that cannot be ignored among them. A research done by agroup of students from the Peking University reveals that over 80% participants regard watching films as one of their entertainments, and most of them responded positively after watching films with the hope of having fun. Thus,films are worth watching also when they can bring us good moods.

Furthermore, watching films always accompanied by together with friends and family members, which leads to opportunities to enjoy social and family life. Under this condition, watching films is necessary although their content may not help us accumulate our knowledge. President Bush once said he liked spending time with his family watching different sorts of movies, and in this way a good relationship within his family was maintained as he usually did not have much time to stay with his family members. From this example, watching movies is really a useful way to develop relationships whether their contents are beneficial or not.

Nevertheless, some may argue that time is really important for modern people and as a result, watching movies that cannot teach us something about the real life can be an inappropriate use ofspare time. At this point, what does spare time really mean? It is a chance to relax ourselves, and to watch movies can perfectly achieve this goal. For instance, if you are watching the film ‘Tropical Forest’, which is mainly about nature sceneries, you will probably feel mentally relaxed as if you are traveling in a scenery spot.

To conclude, I regard watching movies as a way to have fun, enjoy ourselves with friends or families, as well as to relax ourselves. Therefore, the statement of only watching movies when they can teach us real-life knowledge is indefensible and meaningless.

bonnenuit

As the increase of movie industry recently, there are more people becoming interested in watching movies in their spare time. However, many people think it is only worth while watching movies which are meaningful for their lives. Otherwise it will be a waste of time. Personally,I do not agree with such view by holding the opinion that to watch all kinds of movies makes sense to our lives.

To begin with, it is undeniable that watching movies can be a way of entertainment instead of necessarily being a method to learn something. In other words, we can have fun watching different kinds of movies, such as watching comedies. For example, recently I have watched a movie named ‘High Kick’, which was produced in Korea and contains(时态不一致） many elements of humor. I laughed so often that I felt really happy when watching it. Moreover, though there are many daily activities which involve entertainment,watching movies is one that cannot be ignored among them. A research done by a group of students from the Peking University reveals that over 80% participants regard watching films as one of their entertainments, and most of them responded（时态） positively after watching films with the hope of having fun. Thus,films are worth watching also when they can bring us good moods.

Furthermore, watching films always accompanied by together with friends and family members（缺主语，否则accompanied发生就不对了，是人被accompanied的，而不是 watching films), which leads to opportunities to enjoy social and family life. Under this condition, watching films is necessary although theircontent may not help us accumulate our knowledge. President Bush once said that(写作中最好别省） he liked spending time with his family watching different sorts of movies, and in this way a good relationship within his family was maintained as he usually did not have much time to stay with his family members. From this example, watching movies is really a useful way to develop relationships whether their contents are beneficial or not.

Nevertheless, some may argue that time is really important for modern people and as a result, watching movies that cannot teach us something about the real life can be an inappropriate use of spare time. At this point, what does spare time really mean? It is a chance to relax ourselves, and to watch movies can perfectly achieve this goal. For instance, if you are watching the film ‘Tropical Forest’, which is mainly about nature sceneries, you will probably feel mentally relaxed as if you are traveling in a scenery spot.

To conclude, I regard watching movies as a way to have fun, enjoy ourselves with friends or families, as well as to（既然前面enjoy也没有，这个to也可以省略） relax ourselves. Therefore, the statement of only watching movies when they can teach us real-life knowledge is indefensible and meaningless.


虽然你没怎么用高级词汇
但文章很直白简单易懂
论据也很充分
个别时态问题注意一下就可以了

陈喵喵holdon

想问下关于我文中几个时态错误的问题比方说was produced和contains 我当时是觉得 拍是过去拍的 而包括了什么是客观事实
所以一个用了过去时一个用了现在时..后面有几个错误也是这个愿意造成的，而忽略了时态一致问题
希望能解答下哈
谢谢批改啊 受益~

陈喵喵holdon

As the increase of movie industry recently, there are more people becoming interested in watching movies in their spare time. However, many people think it is only worth while watching movies which are meaningful for their lives. Otherwise it will be a waste of time. Personally,I do not agree with such view by holding the opinion that to watch all kinds of movies makes sense to our lives.

To begin with, it is undeniable that watching movies can be a way of entertainment instead of necessarily being a method to learn something. In other words, we can have fun watching different kinds of movies, such as watching comedies. For example, recently I have watched a movie named ‘High Kick’, which was produced in Korea and contains(时态不一致） many elements of humor. I laughed so often that I felt really happy when watching it. Moreover, though there are many daily activities which involve entertainment,watching movies is one that cannot be ignored among them. A research done by a group of students from the Peking University reveals that over 80% participants regard watching films as one of their entertainments, and most of them responded（时态） positively after watching films with the hope of having fun. Thus,films are worth watching also when they can bring us good moods.

Furthermore, watching films always accompanied by together with friends and family members（缺主语，否则accompanied发生就不对了，是人被accompanied的，而不是 watching films), which leads to opportunities to enjoy social and family life. Under this condition, watching films is necessary although theircontent may not help us accumulate our knowledge. President Bush once said that(写作中最好别省） he liked spending time with his family watching different sorts of movies, and in this way a good relationship within his family was maintained as he usually did not have much time to stay with his family members. From this example, watching movies is really a useful way to develop relationships whether their contents are beneficial or not.

Nevertheless, some may argue that time is really important for modern people and as a result, watching movies that cannot teach us something about the real life can be an inappropriate use of spare time. At this point, what does spare time really mean? It is a chance to relax ourselves, and to watch movies can perfectly achieve this goal. For instance, if you are watching the film ‘Tropical Forest’, which is mainly about nature sceneries, you will probably feel mentally relaxed as if you are traveling in a scenery spot.

To conclude, I regard watching movies as a way to have fun, enjoy ourselves with friends or families, as well as to（既然前面enjoy也没有，这个to也可以省略） relax ourselves. Therefore, the statement of only watching movies when they can teach us real-life knowledge is indefensible and meaningless.


虽然你没怎么用高级词汇
但文章很直白简单易懂
论据也很充分
个别时态问题注意一下就可以了

-- by 会员 bonnenuit (2012/10/11 17:32:46)

想问下关于我文中几个时态错误的问题比方说was produced和contains 我当时是觉得 拍是过去拍的 而包括了什么是客观事实
所以一个用了过去时一个用了现在时..后面有几个错误也是这个愿意造成的，而忽略了时态一致问题
希望能解答下哈
谢谢批改啊 受益~

陈喵喵holdon

综合TPO21

The reading passage explores the benefits of genetic modified trees, and the professor deals with the same issue in the lecture. However, she thinks that there aresome serious problems and costs with trees with genetic modification, which contradicts the reading. Also, the professor supports her opinion by offering three specific areas of evidence.

To begin with, although the reading suggests that genetic modified trees are always designed to be morelikely to survive than natural trees, the professor in the lecture claims that such modified trees may be resistant to one certain kind of condition, but it may not survive in diverse conditions. This is because when face different types of conditions, such as varied climates or insects, natural trees will ensure some individuals to survive while others are killed. Nevertheless, the genetic modified tress are totally different, which means they are so uniform that when they are exposed to conditions which they are not designed for, they are likely to be completely wiped out. Obviously, the professor’s argument disproves the counterpart in the reading passage.

Moreover, despite the statement in the reading that there will be economic benefits as a result of planting genetic modified trees, the professor contends that hidden costs cannot be ignored. In other words, seeds with genetic modification are much more expensive and after they grow up, the people growing them cannot get their seeds legally. Instead they have to pay the company that modified the trees in order to continue planting them.

Finally, the professor asserts that genetic modified trees will cause more damage to local wild trees, whereas the author of the reading claims that trees with genetic modification will prevent overexploitation of wild trees. The professor proves that this claim is indefensible by pointing out that genetic modified trees always grow so aggressively that local wild trees cannot compete natural resources such as water with them.

Catherie

TPO 21 修改

红色部分 表示需改正
黄色部分 表建议
绿色表 very good
The reading passage explores the benefits of genetic modified trees, and the professor deals with the same issue（容易误解为the benefits of genetic modified trees） in the lecture. However, she thinks that there are some serious problems and costs with trees with（of） genetic modification, which contradicts the reading. Also, the professor supports her opinion by offering three specific areas of evidence.

To begin with, although the reading suggests that genetic modified trees are always designed to be more likely to survive than natural trees, the professor in the lecture claims that such modified trees may be resistant to one certain kind of condition, but(之前用了though，不能再用 but) it may not survive in diverse conditions. This is because when facing（前面省略了主语natural trees，那么用Ving） different types of conditions, such as varied climates or insects, natural trees will ensure some individuals to survive while others are killed. Nevertheless, the genetic modified tress are totally different, which means they are so uniform that when they are exposed to conditions which they are not designed for, ?. (逗号不具有连接句子的功能，后面是一个新的句子)They are likely to be completely wiped out. Obviously, the professor’s argument disproves the counterpart in the reading passage.


Moreover, despite the statement in the reading that there will be economic benefits as a result of planting genetic modified trees, the professor contends that hidden costs cannot be ignored. In other words, seeds with genetic modification are much more expensive and after they grow up, the people growing them cannot get their seeds legally. Instead they have to pay the company that modified the trees in order to continue planting them.

Finally, the professor asserts that genetic modified trees will cause more damage to local wild trees, whereas the author of the reading claims that trees with genetic modification will prevent overexploitation of wild trees. The professor proves that this claim is indefensible by pointing out that genetic modified trees always grow so aggressively that local wild trees cannot compete natural resources, such as water, with them.


总体写的挺好的，字数也很足……

陈喵喵holdon

10.12综合TPO22

The reading passage explores the critics about regarding ethanol fuels as an alternative to gasoline in the United States. However, the professor in the lecture thinks that it is actually a good replacement of gasoline, and no one of the critics offered in the reading is convincing. Also, the professor supports his view by pointing out three areas of evidence.

To begin with, although the reading suggests that the increased use of ethanol fuel would not help to solve the environmental problem of global warming, the professor contends that the use of ethanol fuel at least not adds global warming. This is because during the growing process ofcorns, which are the materials of making ethanol, carbon dioxide is absorbed to make nutrition, which means CO2 is removed meanwhile it is produced. As aresult, that counteracts the exaggeration of global warming. Obviously, the professor disproves the counterpart in the reading passage.

Moreover, despite the statement provided in the reading that ethanol is made of corns that are food for some animals, the professor argues that this does not have to reduce sources of food for animals.In other words, ethanol-making uses a composition of corns’ cell walls, which is not eaten by animals and always recycles in the nature.

Finally, the professor asserts that ethanol’s price will be able to compete with gasoline, whereas the author of the reading claims that ethanol’s price will be very high as soon as the government stops offering tax subsidies. The professor proves that this claim is indefensible by pointing out that once the production of ethanol becomes larger resulted from people’s greater consumption, its price will drop consequently. In more details, there may be an over 3 times production of ethanol which leads to a price decrease of40%.