fairy作文贴 每日练习ING

ykhjy

8.5  独立修改
蓝色模版，黄色需修改，红色修改，绿色总结
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement. Movies and television have more negative
effects than positive effects on the way young people behave.

Lacking experience and self-exploration, young people tend to be easily effected by television dramas and movies. They are likely to follow the behaviors of the fictional figures. And the question is, does the scenes and plots in movies and TV series influence youngsters in positive or negative ways? As for me, I believe generally television and films guide young people to live a better life. And my reasons are listed as follows. 【观点明确。】

In the first place, those positive values explained in a movie or TV drama will lead the young in the right direction. Under the supervision of the central propaganda department, the themes of the stories shown in cinemas and on television are well-chosen and strictly censored. In other words, those movies and dramas which bear the danger of stimulating negative emotions such as anti-socialism, rebellion and self-deploration will be banned. Therefore, the plots and social values in the films and television seen will cultivate young people's positive feelings like persistency, nostalgia, thanksgiving and love for life, which imperceptibly lead youngsters to behave better. 【指出电影电视的情节是被删选过的，负面影响不会传播给青少年。这个角度很好。用词也很好】

Apart from stories, many television program and documentary movies also play an educational and informational role. Nowadays, an increasing number of TV programs are offering meaningful and easily understandable lessons concerning history, world economy and technology; documentary movies like Baraka presented abundant awesome sceneries around world, which at the meantime warn the audience on environmental protection.  Unlike knowledge we learn from books, motion pictures and audio sounds in videos together provide young people with a more clear and vivid learning. In that way, the young will substantiate themselves by updated informations and varied lectures on multimedias【这句话我不是很明白，用。。。证明他们自己？】.  【指出电影电视的教育作用以及生动教学的优势。第二个角度也挺好的】


Admittedly, there are recurrent violent and pornographic scenes in videos. Young people are not mature enough to judge between reality and fiction: many would mistakenly take what they seen in the movies and dramas as the real world, and thus truly practice the bad behaviors shown in the videos.
In that perspective, television and films will definitely exert a bad effect on young people. 【让步，说明电影和电视中暴力场面对青少年的负面影响。结构很完整】

In sum, movies and television, on the whole, guide young people in their way of growing up in that they present positive values and educational informations. Yet parents should guard the young from watching violent and pornographic videos in case of indiscriminate imitation.【总结了俩正面point和对让步的补充】

【整篇文章观点明确，结构清晰，切入点很好，用词又很高级。楼主你作文很厉害了啊】

fairyfinger

The lecture talks about the further exploration of Chaco house, the result of which shows that none of the theories conjectured in the passage is convincing.

First, there are few fireplaces. That is, the number of fireplaces which are essential for family cooking is not proportional to the supposed number of families there. Thus, this Chaco house should not had been used for residential purpose. This directly contradicts to the first suggestion in the passage.

Second, no trace of maize or maize container were found. The passage indicates that the house could be used for preserving food thanks to its big size. If that is true, there must be some remainders of maize on the floor or food container. Yet neither of them has been discovered. Therefore, the second theory suggested in the passage is also incorrect.

Then the professor moves to the third theory in the passage: he talks about the Pueblo Alto next to the house. Apart from broken pots, many other materials of building trash like sand and stone were found in the mound, which means that it might had been used to place trash. Thus, the broken pots may also be the used-up tools of the workers. Thus, the lecturer refute the ceremonial use of the house, as presented in the passage.

In conclusion, the passage discuss about three possible function of the Chaco, yet the professor assets that none of them is reasonable and gives his proofs.

fairyfinger

我终于搞清楚改什么了。。
蓝色模版，黄色需修改，红色修改，绿色总结
8.4 综合  
The lecturer talks about a company's observation on its team works' performances and their results. He finds out that the actual effect of team work is very different to what indicated in the passage, which ponits out that team work is advantageous【我觉得这句话会不会有些指代不明】. 【首段指出了主要内容以及与reading passage的关系，已经达到目的了】


In the first place, instead of working together to make the work proceed more quickly, the real situation is that some people got free rides. In other words, the good result was regarded as the achievenment of the whole team. Thus, some people who did not work hard are given the same credits with those who worked whole-heartedly. From that perspective, those who ought to "shine out" were negleted. That directly contradicts to the passage which says that certain individuals are getting more chance to shine in team work.

Secondly, team work did not process quickly as expected since there were many disputes among different individuals. The passage says that team work is more efficient thanks to the aggregation of labor and resources. The fact is that, however, different people hold diverted ponit of views, and team work makes it more time-consuming to reach a consent. Consequently, it will hinder the progression of team work. Therefore, the lecture oppose the passage on the ponit of work speed. 【感觉这个和第一点是同一个把，quickly work process 和 work speed】

The last but not the least, the case turns out to be that team work did not encourage more creative ideas and solutions. In any team, usually there exist some influential people in the team, who can easily sway the opinions of the whole team. On the other hand, the voice of the seemingly tiny people are likely to be ignored without furthur discussion. Therefore, the team was led only by the prestigious few, but not the best idea among all team members as the passage infers.

In sum, considering all the factors and aspects above, the lecture contradicts the passage in the working efficiency, rewardings for team members and affluency of ideas of team work. 【结构清晰，过程详细，但想和lz探讨下，这篇文章是不是这样三个点：1.work speed 2. creative ideas and solutions not always come 3. not always be rewarding for team members  】

-- by 会员 ykhjy (2012/8/5 21:03:20)

是啊我第一点写的有点摸棱两可。要改正！！免得和第二点弄混了
是啊我听的是这三个点呢～～XD

fairyfinger

8月8日
What is the main role of the university professor, to educate students or to do research?

An increasing number of university professors now immerse themselves in doing researches, which can bring them more money and fame. As teachers cannot easily get fired like other employees, many professors dare to sacrifice most of their time doing their own researches. And many of them believe that those surveys can enrich their knowledge and thereby teach better. Yet I consider that statement a presage(jiekou) since doing researches is detrimental to teaching. And my reasons are listed as follows.

Teacher is a special prefession where people exhaust themselves in order to make students stronger. That is undoubtedly the job calling of a teacher, and a university professor is not an exception. The natural concern for a teacher should be his students, but not himselve. Finishing a research, namely writting esssays and analyzing numerous datas, needs great time and efforts, which will definitely cut professors' attention and devotion on students. Yet university learning is really important for youngsters as it is a place where they find their true interests, form life value, learn specialized technique and knowledges, all of which influence their future development a great deal. In that way, for the purpose of gaining his own academic status and much money, a professor is actually sacrificing the future of all his students: a not well-prepared and cursory lesson will deprive students of their interests in the subject; a teacher's absent-minded and perfunctory behaviors in the class tells his students that they can treat their future career in the same way. Therefore, as a teacher, a university professor should always put his students at the first place.

From a more objective perspective, college professors ought to take teaching as their main concern in that they are employeed by schools and are paid by students' tuition fee. If one wants to do research, instead of applying for an educational position, he should go to research institutions, where he can do research with much more subsidies and time. If, however, one decided to be a teacher, he must serve students as his biggest clients. This is because parents pay him stable salaries. Consequently, in terms of the relationship between employees and emloyers, a univeristy professor should take educating students as his major concern.

Admittedly, doing researches can sometimes improve professors' educating for the reason that it can furthur substantiate them with more knowledge and informations. As long as professors aim at enhancing their teaching performances and their regular teaching quality do not deteriorate, a reasonable number of researches are acceptable.

In conlusion, the natural concern for university professors should be educating college students for both subjective and objetcive reasons. And doing researches properly can benefit students as well.

小兔爱twins

The lecture talks about the further exploration of Chaco house, the result of which shows that none of the theories conjectured in the passage is convincing.

First, there are few fireplaces. That is, the number of fireplaces which are essential for family cooking is not proportional to the supposed number of families there. Thus, this Chaco house should not had been used for residential purpose. This directly contradicts to the first suggestion in the passage.

Second, no trace of maize or maize container were found. The passage indicates that the house could be used for preserving food thanks to its big size. If that is true, there must be some remainders of maize on the floor or food container. Yet neither of them has been discovered. Therefore, the second theory suggested in the passage is also incorrect.

Then the professor moves to the third theory in the passage: he talks about the Pueblo Alto next to the house. Apart from broken pots, many other materials of building trash like sand and stone were found in the mound, which means that it might had been used to place trash. Thus, the broken pots may also be the used-up tools of the workers. Thus, the lecturer refute the ceremonial use of the house, as presented in the passage.

In conclusion, the passage discuss about three possible function of the Chaco, yet the professor assets that none of them is reasonable and gives his proofs.

细节和整体都不错 个人觉得不太需要修改了。。

Vance1991

An increasing number of university professors now immerse themselves in doing researches, which can bring them more money and fame. As teachers cannot easily get fired like other employees, many professors dare to sacrifice most of their time doing their own researches. And many of them believe that those surveys can enrich their knowledge and thereby teach better. Yet I consider that statement a presage(jiekou)(虽然看不懂,但是觉得很厉害的样子...) since doing researches is detrimental to teaching. And my reasons are listed as follows.

Teacher is a special prefession(profession) where people exhaust themselves in order to make students stronger. That is undoubtedly the job calling of a teacher, and a university professor is not an exception. The natural concern for a teacher should be his students, but not himselve. Finishing a research, namely writting esssays and analyzing numerous datas, needs great time and efforts, which will definitely cut professors' attention and devotion on students. Yet university learning is really important for youngsters as it is a place where they find their true interests, form life value, learn specialized technique and knowledges, all of which influence their future development a great deal. In that way, for the purpose of gaining his own academic status and much money, a professor is actually sacrificing the future of all his students: a not well-prepared and cursory lesson will deprive students of their interests in the subject; a teacher's absent-minded and perfunctory behaviors in the class tells his students that they can treat their future career in the same way. Therefore, as a teacher, a university professor should always put his students at the first place.

From a more objective perspective, college professors ought to take teaching as their main concern in that they are employeed by schools and are paid by students' tuition fee. If one wants to do research, instead of applying for an educational position, he should go to research institutions, where he can do research with much more subsidies and time. If, however, one decided to be a teacher, he must serve students as his biggest clients. This is because parents pay him stable salaries. Consequently, in terms of the relationship between employees and emloyers, a univeristy professor should take educating students as his major concern.

Admittedly, doing researches can sometimes improve professors' educating for the reason that it can furthur substantiate them with more knowledge and informations(informaiton是不可数名词). As long as professors aim at enhancing their teaching performances and their regular teaching quality do not deteriorate, a reasonable number of researches are acceptable.

In conlusion, the natural concern for university professors should be educating college students for both subjective and objetcive reasons. And doing researches properly can benefit students as well.

楼主的作文写很好啊,基本上没有错误,词汇很攻击,句式也很丰富.接近30了...
从楼主的文章里学习好好多词汇...

fairyfinger

TPO7

In the lecture, the professor believes that American companies will eventually adopt the ecocertification policies. And he gives convincing reasons to rebottle the opinions shown in the passage.

First, American people know how to distibguish different advertisments. The passage indicates that the American consumers do not trust all the advertising since they are exposed to too many of them everyday. However, the speaker points out that American people actually trust independent certification agencies, especailly those with international recognition. Therefore they would prefer products with ecocertification to those without it. This directly contradicts to what the passage says.

Second, small difference between prices do not make it a siginificant factor for American consumers. According to the pasage, if the price difference is less than five percent, consumers will care more about other factors. Moreover, American people value environmental protection a lot, and are likely to take the ecocertification as an important element when choosing products. That cast doubt on the view that a higher price will prevent the companies with ecocertification from gaining more customers, as the passage says.

Third,  foreign competition drives domestic companies to obtain an ecocertifcation. The passage says that American wood companies do not need to get a ecocertifcation in that most of their products are sold whithin US. Yet in his lecture, the speaker disputes this assertation in terms of foreign competition: foreign companies selling ecocertificated prodcust will attract more Amercan consumers than domestic comapnies. Thus,  it is necessary fot American companies to keep up with the world trend. That contradicts to the view shown by the passage.

In sum, the passage asserts that American wood companies will not follow the rest of the world to earn an ecocertification. Nonetheless, the lecturer refutes that perception and offers reasonable proofs.

hjl80959

In the lecture, the professor believes that American companies will eventually adopt the ecocertification policies. And he gives convincing reasons to rebottle the opinions shown in the passage.

First, American people know how to distibguish different advertisments. The passage indicates that the American consumers do not trust all the advertising since they are exposed to too many of them everyday. However, the speaker points out that American people actually trust independent certification agencies, especailly those with international recognition. Therefore they would prefer products with ecocertification to those without it. This directly contradicts to what the passage says.

没有什么问题，就是拼写错误多了一点，听得点也比较全面

Second, small difference between prices do not make it a siginificant factor for American consumers. According to the pasage, （文章中没有这句话吧）if the price difference is less than five percent, consumers will care more about other factors. Moreover, American people value environmental protection a lot, and are likely to take the ecocertification as an important element when choosing products. That cast doubt on the view that a higher price will prevent the companies with ecocertification from gaining more customers, as the passage says.

Third,  foreign competition drives domestic companies to obtain an ecocertifcation. The passage says that American wood companies do not need to get a ecocertifcation in that most of their products are sold whithin US. Yet in his lecture, the speaker disputes this assertation in terms of foreign competition: foreign companies selling ecocertificated prodcust will attract more Amercan consumers than domestic comapnies. Thus,  it is necessary fot American companies to keep up with the world trend. That contradicts to the view shown by the passage.

In sum, the passage asserts that American wood companies will not follow the rest of the world to earn an ecocertification. Nonetheless, the lecturer refutes that perception and offers reasonable proofs.



所有重要的点都说到了，应该没有问题了，拼写错误较多，楼主喜欢每段开始陈述一下观点，是我觉得可以借鉴的。听力也不错哈，综合应该没什么问题了

fairyfinger

是啊拼写错误好多。。考试的时候必须得留时间检查啊！！主要要检查的就是拼写错误.>.,,<

fairyfinger

8.10独立
8.10
Some people say we should never be impolite to another person. Do you agree or disagree?

Considering the diveristy and specific background of each individual, we should respect others' different thoughts and behaviors. So being polite is the basic principle of interpersonal communication.  Yet there are serveral circumstances under which we should be strict and even though on others for special purpose. Actually, some people do not deserve our polite treatment and my reasons are listed as follows.

In the first place, some inhuman criminals ought to be blamed at. For personal interests, some people sacarifice others' safty and life: they commite severe crimes like arson, kidnapping, murder and rape, which either deprived others' of their precious lives or future happiness. To be more specific, a person with undiminishable burned scars on his body, epecially face, will lose his confidence and stand others' avoiding look; a girl with a horrible memory of being raped will find it hard to approach any male; a family with one beloved member being killed would never be complete again. In that way, criminals commited irreparable crimes to other innocent people. The police and all the society should thereby be strict on them, so that they can understand how big mistakes they had made to others and bear the sequential punishment. Thus, to crule criminals, certain fierce treatment is necessary.

In terms of daily communication, some unreasonable people also needs to be harshly dealt with. It goes beyond doubt that humans are clever animals who tend to bully the weak and fear the strong. If one always smile at others and do not shout at or quarrel with other people, people around him are likely to define him as a unprincipled nice guy. As a result, other people would behave unscupulously in front of him, namely shouting at him freely, asking him for help unconditionally, and even ignoring his opinions or demands. That is because he is a guy who will never be harsh on others. Therefore, proper tough treatment on others is a way of gaining respect and self-esteem. On the contrary, a person treat others politely regardless of the situation often cannot win due respect.

Admittedly, over-ferocious actions would be detrimental. Continuous ill-treatment on prisoners will distort their mentality and arouse anti-social feelings, which may lead to more horrible crimes; arbitrary impolitenss to friends will eventually result in being isolated by all of them. As long as the person really deserves so, we normally should not be harsh on him.  

In sum, unconditonally politeness to others is not suggestive. People have to act strictly to crule criminals and to people around us if needed. However, overly severity should be avoided.