[原创]何去何从

tulipmontreal

选择工作和稳定的生活！

whitesand

需要好好权衡,我认为 既然你原来的工作也不错,为了考试都放弃了，而且已经努力了3个月, 不如再使把劲把这条路走完。

如果放弃考试和其他梦想接受现在这份工作，只要以后不会觉得遗憾也行。

babypace

以下是引用似水年华在2004-10-13 8:53:00的发言：

i don't know how to express my gratitude for all of u.

a story that i can't forget. Oneday, i am not happy and sat here quietly, my boss, an American came and took picture of me with a camera. later he showed me the picture and said:" life is too short to be sad, i don't know why your Chinese people always trap yourself, see the time u waste for nothing? don't think too much and just do it, if u are happy, why u have to care too much about what u can get?"

i don't want to stop here, i want to fly again to see how far, how high and how beautifully i can fly, i like the feeling of fly although there is rain, there is thunder and there is cold wind.

Well, if you choose to see how far you can fly, ok, just go ahead. But don't expect too much, because you don't know what's gonna happen. So cool yourself down about the expectation. If you don't see things turn out the way you want to be, don't regret. Because that's your choice, that's what you choose to be.

To be frankly, Americans have different values from ours. That's why your boss can't understand the "trap" thing. Sometimes we can look into their life values and learn something from them, but not always. Because what's build up the value system is culture, and you will never escape from your culture influence. So it's kinda of no way to be an "American way" for Chinese. For him, I also think there must be some traps  he has from my "Chinese" perspective, but just another different "trap".

We all have our own problems and lives, so the decision making should be on your own. Life is definately short, and chasing dream is what everyone wants to. If I were you, just suppose, I will consider my family members' suggestion, and children's. Because when you are married, you are not only yourself. Marriage is also a choice, once you are in, you are bounded. That's a commitment, especially when there's a child. Of course you are an individual, you are living for yourself, not others, but family is also a part of your life. I know Americans don't have such a strong family power distance, but also not all of them.

To be short, my choice at your situation will be "stay". I won't leave the family or put my family's future in question. I would like to take that good offer, and be a happy women forever. There's a lot of things we can't experience. Yeah, that's why life is short. Also, we should learn how to give up, because success or happiness is not judged from only one dimension.

流沙

同意babypace的看法。“just do it”说起来很轻松，但做起来要好好考虑。如果你只是要考gmat，我会毫不犹豫的鼓励你，因为一场考试没有什么大不了，付出终会有回报。但是跟随gmat的是申请，以及随之而来的求学生活....，这个会牵涉到很多人，譬如你的家庭，那就不是do或者跳出trap的问题了。

就譬如说，你的孩子现在6岁，如果你要读书，可能这几年你都会对他（她）疏于照顾，那么你会不会有遗憾呢？我不知道你现在的遗憾是什么，或者它到了什么样的程度。但是决定是要考虑很多方面的，慎重点比较好。也许这样说会给你一些压力，请不要见怪。

Anyway，如果你想好了，在gmat这条路上一定会能得到很多帮助，这个倒不用担心。祝你能早日找到方向～

jackshop

支持一下．辞职在家两个月．苦战以杀Ｇ．虽然ＧＷＤ都错一半．但依然不打算放弃．although there is still a long way to go, maybe we could find some miracle in this next minute.

whitesand

我忍不住再上来说说我的看法，估计要挨很多砖头

家庭问题每个人每个时候都会遇到，但也不是不可调和的矛盾，看你怎么解决。

比如20多岁，那不开始谈婚论嫁了吗？这节骨眼上把男女朋友搁那儿自己去读书，万一被别人拣了去怎么办？

结了婚吧，新婚1~2年舍得去吗？还耽误生孩子了呢。

生了孩子至少得照顾到5岁吧，怎么能出去呢？

你看如果老是把家庭问题拿出来说事，是没有办法的啦。我倒觉得你现在这时候出去学对家庭的影响不会太大，一是家庭已经很稳定，出去1-2年是很好的调剂。二是已经有了一些经济基础，读书的心情比较轻松。三是孩子都9岁了，完全能照顾自己，比起那些孩子小的容易多了。

我觉得你在辞职之前肯定对很多问题都考虑过了，但是复习过程中遇到的困难让你开始动摇，正好又有了一个很好的offer，人的选择多了，就比较容易犹豫不决。这样想想吧，接受了这个新的工作之后会不会让你一直很满足不会再做这个梦？会不会有一天又遇到了瓶颈却已经不可能再有提升的机会了？再说现在并没有到做最后决定的时候啊，考完GMAT就可以找一份工作，边工作边申请。就算最后决定去读书了吧，MBA的时间不长，平时电话互联网联系着，假期你回来或者家里人过去看看，很快就过去了。先好好复习考试吧，车到山前必有路，别给自己增加心理压力了。

似水年华

逍遥mm说到我心里去了。

其实正象你说的那样，有这样那样的原因，阻止着我，直到现在。也在辞职以前做了充分的准备，包括征询所有家人和知心朋友的意见，正象你说的，他们认为如果要出去，现在是最佳时间，孩子不大不小，我妈妈可以帮助照顾。

我很庆幸，所有的人都很支持我。

我一生没什么值得骄傲的，唯有我的女儿，她聪明、独立，非常美丽而且善解人意，每天都陪我看英文，她是我奋斗的动力来源。我一直是知足常乐的一个人，没有什么野心，我就是想再飞一次，而且都到这个时候了，任何的动摇都是不应该的，大家要以我为戒，退缩是懦弱，不成熟的表现，既然决定了，就要走下去，我今天已经给那家公司打电话，他们说没想到我这么上进，他们说可以等我考完再说，这个职位没了，他们可以帮忙介绍别的。

谢谢你们的关心，祝大家好运！！！

valarie

support too. Never give up. Never surrender once you have a decision. And I'm deeply moved by your courage.

babypace

For your specific case, according to my words, my point is

1. As your boss is an American, he can't understand much about Chinese way, thus his suggestion is questionable. BTW, the fact is, in America, a lot of white women have higher education level but lower employment level, proportionally. They usually quit the job after they have a baby.

2. Stay with your family and make decision in sake of your family is a kind of sacrifice. It's not easy, but it's normal for a married person. There are bunch of examples.

3. The future you are looking for might not be the way you thought. After MBA, you still have to start with an entry level in America, that's typical. Of course there are exceptions, or you can go back Chian directly after your MBA. In this situation, the ROI of MBA is relatively low.

that's my 2 cents. good luck!

流沙

楼主决定了，自然就支持楼主。不要为一些小困难放弃哦，我们大家支持你！