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Letter from JP MORGAN CEO to Ladies Looking for a Rich Hubby

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楼主
发表于 2011-11-3 10:13:17 | 只看该作者 回帖奖励 |倒序浏览 |阅读模式
Title: What Should I do to Marry A Rich Guy?
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I'm going to be honest of what I'm going to say here. I'm 25 this year. I'm very pretty, have style 'n good taste. I wish to marry a guy with $500k annual salary or above.

You might say that I'm greedy, but an annual salary of $1M is considered only as middle class in New York.

My requirement is not high. Is there anyone in this forum who has an income of $500k annual salary? Are you all married?

I wanted to ask: what should I do to marry rich persons like you?

Among those I've dated, the richest is $250k annual income,'n it seems that this is my upper limit.

If someone is going to move into high cost residential area on the west of New York City Garden(?), $250k annual income is not enough.

I'm here humbly to ask a few questions:
1) Where do most rich bachelors hang out? (Please list down the names 'n addresses of bars, restaurant, gym)
2) Which age group should I target?
3) Why most wives of the riches are only average-looking? I've met a few girls who don't have looks 'n are not interesting, but they are able to marry rich guys.
4) How do you decide who can be your wife, 'n who can only be your girlfriend? (my target now is to get married)

Ms. Pretty

A Philosophical reply from CEO of J.P. Morgan:

Dear Ms. Pretty,
I have read your post with great interest. Guess there are lots of girls out there who have similar questions like yours. Please allow me to analyse your situation as a professional investor.

My annual income is more than $500k, which meets your requirement, so I hope
everyone believes that I'm not wasting time here.

From the standpoint of a business person, it is a bad decision to marry you. The answer is very simple, so let me explain.

Put the details aside, what you're trying to do is an exchange of "beauty" 'n "money" : Person A provides beauty,'n Person B pays for it, fair 'n square.

However, there's a deadly problem here, your beauty will fade, but my money will not be gone without any good reason. The fact is, my income might increase from year to year, but you can't be prettier year after year.

Hence from the viewpoint of economics, I am an appreciation asset, 'n you are a depreciation asset. It's not just normal depreciation, but exponential depreciation. If that is your only asset, your value will be much worse 10 years later.

By the terms we use in Wall Street, every trading has a position, dating with you is also a "trading position".
If the trade value dropped we will sell it 'n it is not a good idea to keep it for long term - same goes with the marriage that you wanted. It might be cruel to say this, but in order to make a wiser decision any assets with great depreciation value will be sold or "leased".

Anyone with over $500k annual income is not a fool; we would only date you, but will not marry you. I would advice that you forget looking for any clues to marry a rich guy. 'n by the way, you could make yourself to become a rich person with $500k annual income.This has better chance than finding a rich fool.

Hope this reply helps. If you are interested in "leasing" services, do contact me.

signed,
J.P. Morgan CEO...
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沙发
发表于 2011-11-3 10:41:32 | 只看该作者
"If you are interested in "leasing" services, do contact me."亮了
板凳
发表于 2011-11-21 23:18:58 | 只看该作者
Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes clean to the bones.
地板
发表于 2011-11-22 01:02:18 | 只看该作者
Haha...really funny
But the CEO didn't give out reasons why those rich guys marry average looking woman.
Plus, I suppose if the rich guy wants to marry someone and have a baby,the pretty girl is a good option. After all, the good look passes to the next generation...hopfully.
Just some of stupid thoughts. Thanks for sharing!! I like stories like this a lot. =)
5#
 楼主| 发表于 2011-11-22 02:05:23 | 只看该作者
Haha...really funny
But the CEO didn't give out reasons why those rich guys marry average looking woman.
Plus, I suppose if the rich guy wants to marry someone and have a baby,the pretty girl is a good option. After all, the good look passes to the next generation...hopfully.
Just some of stupid thoughts. Thanks for sharing!! I like stories like this a lot. =)
-- by 会员 starcandice (2011/11/22 1:02:18)


Haha thanks.
Good luck on your exam!
6#
发表于 2011-11-28 11:15:44 | 只看该作者
哈哈,才看到lz的这个post,quite funny indeed!
不过有点怀疑这个是不是出自jamie dimon本人,他给人的感觉非常pragmatic,从公司邮件上感觉不出来他会回复这个女生

不过话说回来,这个女士真有凤姐范儿!感谢lz分享
7#
发表于 2011-11-28 11:43:41 | 只看该作者
貌似烙铁~ 飘过~
8#
发表于 2011-11-28 13:45:36 | 只看该作者
nonsense
9#
发表于 2011-11-28 13:49:38 | 只看该作者
Haha...really funny
But the CEO didn't give out reasons why those rich guys marry average looking woman.
Plus, I suppose if the rich guy wants to marry someone and have a baby,the pretty girl is a good option. After all, the good look passes to the next generation...hopfully.
Just some of stupid thoughts. Thanks for sharing!! I like stories like this a lot. =)
-- by 会员 starcandice (2011/11/22 1:02:18)



佐々木希!!!
10#
发表于 2016-2-28 04:52:57 | 只看该作者
言有尽而意无穷~~
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