以下是引用jessiebetty在2006-7-12 14:05:00的发言：给个面子,评以下,第一篇ISSUE The author claims that individuals have the responsibility for preserving the natural environment rather than the government. The argument involves an conflict between the government and the individuals. It gives us a either-or choice about the duty to conserve the environment. But in my opinion, neither take precedence over the other, both government and individuals contribute to the honored obligations. 两个句子并列没有连词？？？ First, we are all familiar with the saying "everyone deserves the obligation to preserve the environment around us." As it is known, publicadvertising（好像有名词）and other ways have been used to punctuate the environmental idea into our lives. Just as the ads say, each simple thing such as picking up gabbages, consuming less energy and saving more water will lead to a better life. First, we are all familiar with the saying "everyone deserves the obligation to preserve the environment around us." As it is known, publicadvertising（好像有名词）and other ways have been used to punctuate the environmental idea into our lives. Just as the ads say, each simple thing such as picking up gabbages, consuming less energy and saving more water will lead to a better life. Second, the government actually plays a privital（pivotal） role in conserving the nature. The environmental problems are in deed the ones in large scope. Simply depending on an individual’s power will not solve the problem. (尝试连在一起实施) Common sense tells us that every individual acts to his own benefits, so（so 不是连词） nothing can guarantee individuals will destroy the nature or waste resources to maximize his profits.
（两个谓语？）Now the importance of the government has been recognized .Government will make a long-term plan according to the specific problems and impose the duty on the individuals regardless of the reluctance of others.
Third, the best way to preserve the environment is( 用上og里面的省略to 的习惯用法了，厉害，但保险点还是
+ to 吧
)combine the power of government and the duty of individuals together. We all know that the pollution has become word-wide, international cooperation among each nation has been necessary.（少连词）
Governments take a leading role in regulating the behavior of wasting and polluting in an overall perspective. Moreover, individuals form the basic elements of carrying out the plan.----〉needed / required
to
carry
out
the
plan.
In sum, we can never conclude that which part is more important than the other. Because integrating the duty of individuals into the planning of government can provide us a surprise result, efficient combination will be the best way to preserve our natural environment. Third, the best way to preserve the environment is( 用上og里面的省略to 的习惯用法了，厉害，但保险点还是
+ to 吧
)combine the power of government and the duty of individuals together. We all know that the pollution has become word-wide, international cooperation among each nation has been necessary.（少连词）
Governments take a leading role in regulating the behavior of wasting and polluting in an overall perspective. Moreover, individuals form the basic elements of carrying out the plan.----〉needed / required
to
carry
out
the
plan.
In sum, we can never conclude that which part is more important than the other. Because integrating the duty of individuals into the planning of government can provide us a surprise result, efficient combination will be the best way to preserve our natural environment. 总体非常好，值得表扬，我也很长时间没看作文了，3天后出炉我的，希望抛砖引玉
大家负责的使劲批评---l另外，我的水平也不高，可以说很低，希望表生气。 | 
京公网安备11010202008513号 京ICP证101109号 京ICP备12012021号
发表于 2006-7-12 23:36:00
