择日不如撞日 来来来写作文！

sherryzhangh

1， 第三段 我想说的是，就算他们content上没有问题，长时间看也不好。。是我自己harmless,写成harmful ,误导了。（了解了。）
2，这个想再问一下，“they have spent too much time exposure to the screen to whichthus the eyesight is vulnerable.”我想表达视力对长时间看屏幕很脆弱（额，中文怎么这么别扭），我觉得我的表达可能是有问题，但你帮我改了后thus是因果，他们不是因果关系。能再帮我看看正确的表达吗  （ they have spent too much time staring at TV screen which result vulnerable eyesight 我也不知道怎么表达， 我的语法特烂)
3，还有，最最重要的问题，你觉得我偏题了吗？题要写的是more negative effect than positive...但我写的是它有什么negative effect，觉得吗？偏题不至于， 只是论述不够全面， 这种独立作文是要你选择一个立场， 同意还是不同意 这种statement, 如果同意， 那就分点分段论证， 常用的论证方法就是例证， 一般分三段， 每段一个分论点statement. 最后一个结尾段。 其实这就是草稿， 写多了，习惯了 就成了你模板的最初形态， 然后你再完善你的模板。应该就能得个不错的分了。
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浅吟天

 （ they have spent too much time staring at TV screen which result vulnerable eyesight 我也不知道怎么表达， 我的语法特烂)

-- by 会员 sherryzhangh (2012/8/6 20:39:39)

我自己看了这句话半天也不知道，感觉中文就有问题，什么叫视力对长时间看电视易受伤害。
改成 they have spent too much time staring at TV screen which result poor eyesight , 就对了，虽然通俗了。vulnerable  脆弱的, 敏感的 形容 eyesight有点不恰当，对吧。

浅吟天

8月8日 独立
What is the main role of the university professor, to educate students or to do research?


Everyone has many roles in daily life, including the university professor. Some people hold that to educate students should be taken priority when a professor consider his role while others think that they should put doing research at the top of the agenda. From my perspective, I agree with the first opinion.

From its definition we can clearly see the anticipation of the public when creating this position. "University professor" means that a teacher who has professional knowledge and skills in the college that can be infused to students.So I think the main role is to cultivate students. Although some professor put lots of their time in doing research, spending precious time on the subject not means this is the major point of their role. Professors can discover new phenomenon from the research and thus get the cutting-edge information in a specific sphere. In this way, they can teach students the recent knowledge with professional insight. What's more, to educate students and to do research is not in a completely rival part. For example, a big project or new research often can not be done by one person, so the professor always needs some student assistants. To these students, this is a good chance to put theory into practice. In other word, even in the research, the professor can educate students as well. So I consider doing research as an essential and practical way to improve the professor himself and supplement academic education.

What's more, if a person's major role is to do research, we can call him a scientist instead of a university professor. As we all know that scientists spend almost totally their time on research and they do not have a duty to get the
Information spread out. On the other hand, university professor are not free of cultivation and inspiration which are the essential duty of their position.

Admittedly, there are more and more professors immerse in their own study, but if they ignore the importance of education, they are not doing their job well and the university and parents will not allow them to do so. If the main role is not to educate, however, I believe that there will be no blame for the ignorance of education.

In a nutshell, university profession's major role is to educate. Doing research is a way of university professor to be more professional and therefore to teach his or her students well, Which is a complement to the main role.

浅吟天

8月8 综合 TPO6
第三个点没听清楚。
The lecturer rejects the ideas presented in the reading passage about the drawbacks of online encyclopedias. In her opinion, online encyclopedia has few errors and no access to fabricate randomly and presents the original edition.

The lecturer doesn't agree with the first drawback of the communal online encyclopedia that it lacks the academic credentials because it is created and edited by internet users instead of experts. She contends that the context of the online encyclopedias is closely perfect due to its changeable attribute. On the other hand, if there is an error in the traditional printed encyclopedias, it has remained decades without correction.

Regarding the opportunity to all users to fabricate online encyclopedias randomly, the lecturer explains that there are two ways to protect from these changes. Firstly, when original creating the encyclopedia, the crucial facts will be formated and thus no one can change the essential context. Therefore, the information will be kept reliable. Secondly, there is a person whose job is to observe whether someone wants to fabricate or corrupt the information. And he has the right to eliminate the malicious changes. On the contrary, the reading passages suggests that everyone can randomly delete or fabricate the original text , and thus there is no guarantee of the quality of the text.

Additionally, the lecturer challenges the last drawback in the material that the communal encyclopedia focus too frequently. She thinks that the traditional encyclopedia is affected by the limited space, so the arrangement of the context is totally decided by the people who edited it with personal feelings. While in the online encyclopedia, the original edition material is presented.

ykhjy

8月8日 独立  修改~~蓝色模版，黄色需修改，红色我改的，绿色总结
What is the main role of the university professor, to educate students or to do research?

Everyone has many roles in daily life, including the university professor. Some people hold that to educate students should be taken priority when a professor consider his role while others think that they should put doing research at the top of the agenda. From my perspective, I agree with the first opinion.【明确了立场，开始的时候用模版还是蛮保险的】

From its【太突兀，which？把后面的university professor提到这里比较好】 definition we can clearly see the anticipation of the public when creating this position. "University professor"【it】 means that a teacher who has professional knowledge and skills in the college that can be infused to【infuse】 students.So I think the main role 【of the professor 】is【should be】  to cultivate students. Although some professors put【spend】 lots of their time in doing research, spending precious time on the subject means this is the major point of their role【it isn't their major role to do research】.【Actually】 Professors can discover new phenomenon from the research and thus【and】 get the cutting-edge information in a specific sphere 【thus】 In this way, they can teach students the recent knowledge with professional insight. What's more【建议这里用，as a matter of fact，因为前面说的也是通过research to educate students，这里用as a matter of fact 可以点明两者关系实质】, to educate students and to do research is【are】 not in a completely rival part. For example, a big project or new research often can not be done by one person, so the professor always needs some student assistants. To these students, this is a good chance to put theory into practice. In other word, even in the research, the professor can educate students as well. So I consider doing research as an essential and practical way to improve the professor himself and【突出重点比较好】supplement academic education.【这个point很好喔】

What's more【前面有了what’s more，可以换一下词，比如 in addition 什么的】, if a person's major role is to do research, we can call him a scientist instead of a university professor. As we all know that scientists spend almost totally their time on research and they do not have a duty to get the Information spread out. On the other hand, university professor are not free of cultivation and inspiration which are the essential duty of their position.【和scientist相比较，这个切入点不错。能有点论据说为什么是他们的本质职责会更好】

Admittedly, there are more and more professors immerse in their own study, but if they ignore the importance of education, they are not doing their job well and the university and parents will not allow them to do so. If the main role is not to educate, however, I believe that there will be no blame for the ignorance of education【不会指责忽视教育？双重否定。。】.【这一段的让步应该说的是professor有做研究的职责，第一句只说越来越多教授投入到他们的研究，这只是一个现象，并没有对此作出解释+后面说的如果叫兽忽视教育怎么怎么样。。。对于整篇文章结构上来说，这一段也构成不了让步了。】

In a nutshell, university profession's major role is to educate. Doing research is a way of university professor to be more professional and therefore to teach his or her students well, Which is a complement to the main role.【总结很好！，点明俩role间的关系】
【整篇文章立场是明确了，只是论证过程中，最好能突出point，多加些论据，还有让步那一段得注意下，比如说教授也有职责做研究说明为什么，然后再说但这并不代表他们可以忽视教育的职责】

浅吟天

8月9日 综合 tpo7
超时了10分钟。。

The lecturer rejects the ideas in the reading passage that American companies will not meet high ecological standards in order to get the certification from an international organization. He argues that people in United States do react to these ecocertification labels and they have the willing to pay a higher price for these products. What's more, the US companies have to keep up with the rest of the world.

To begin with, the lecturer doesn't agree with the first claim in the material that Americans are unaware about the ecocertification label. He contends that people can distinguish the claims made by the company itself and the claims guaranteed by certifications. That is to say，American consumers will react to the advertising in ecocertification lable.

Regarding the price, the reading passage argues that consumers in American are strongly influenced by price, and thus they will not buy ecocertified wood due to its higher price. However, the lecturer explains that only if the price is much higher, consumers will not buy the product. The price of ecocertified wood is not 5% higher than normal price, so the consumers will take the ecocertification effect into account and be likely to buy it. Furthermore, Americans always pay much attention to protecting environment, thus there is definitely a market for ecocertified wood.

Additional, the lecturer agree with the argument that American companies keep up with the rest of the world.If they do not produce ecocertified wood, the foreign companies will swarm into the domestic market and thus take place of American companies. American people do care about environment, so they are willing to buy the product of foreign companies. In order to avoid this negative effect, the US companies have to keep up with the rest of the world to get the ecocertification. On the contrary, the reading suggests that pursuing certification doesn't make sense because  American companies not sell their products abroad and there is no threat in the domestic market.

kchszy061ban

蓝色为意见或建议高亮为精彩绿色为总结红色为错误

The lecturer rejects the ideas presented in the reading passage about the drawbacks of online encyclopedias. In her opinion, online encyclopedia has few errors and no access to fabricate randomly and presents the original edition.

The lecturer doesn't agree with the first drawback of the communal online encyclopedia that it lacks the academic credentials because it is created and edited by internet users instead of experts. She contends that the context of the online encyclopedias is closely perfect due to its changeable attribute. On the other hand, if there is an error in the traditional printed encyclopedias, it has remained decades without correction.（不错的哈）

Regarding the opportunity to all users to fabricate online encyclopedias randomly, the lecturer explains that there are two ways to protect from these changes. Firstly, when original creating the encyclopedia, the crucial facts will be formated and thus no one can change the essential context. Therefore, the information will be kept reliable. Secondly, there is a person whose job is（这里直接用特殊编辑就可以了额） to observe whether someone wants to fabricate or corrupt the information. And he has the right to eliminate the malicious changes. On the contrary, the reading passages suggests that everyone can randomly delete or fabricate the original text , and thus there is no guarantee of the quality of the text.（听力和阅读的字数分配的不错。）

Additionally, the lecturer challenges the last drawback in the material that the communal encyclopedia focus too frequently. She thinks that the traditional encyclopedia is affected by the limited space, so the arrangement of the context is totally decided by the people who edited it with personal feelings. While in the online encyclopedia, the original edition material is presented.

语言不错，只是听力笔记做好就行了

浅吟天

首先，真心谢谢你！改的好详细
嗯 我开始从“自由人”规范用模版了，希望有天模板能有我自己的套路。讨论这个颜色的

8月8日 独立  修改~~蓝色模版，黄色需修改，红色我改的，绿色总结
What is the main role of the university professor, to educate students or to do research?

Everyone has many roles in daily life, including the university professor. Some people hold that to educate students should be taken priority when a professor consider his role while others think that they should put doing research at the top of the agenda. From my perspective, I agree with the first opinion.【明确了立场，开始的时候用模版还是蛮保险的】

From its【太突兀，which？把后面的university professor提到这里比较好】 definition we can clearly see the anticipation of the public when creating this position. "University professor"【it】 means that a teacher who has professional knowledge and skills in the college that can be infused to【infuse】我觉得这个infuse是修饰knowledge and skill的，所以我用了被动。 students.So I think the main role 【of the professor 】is【should be】  to cultivate students. Although some professorsput【spend】这个我搭配不好，想问下是不是没有put some time的说法，其实我本用的spend但觉得与后面重复所以换了个词。 lots of their time in doing research, spending precious time on the subject not meansthis is the major point of their role【it isn't their major role to do research】.【Actually】 Professors can discover new phenomenon from the research and thus【and】 get the cutting-edge information in a specific sphere 【thus】 In this way, they can teach students the recent knowledge with professional insight. What's more【建议这里用，as a matter of fact，因为前面说的也是通过research to educate students，这里用as a matter of fact 可以点明两者关系实质】, to educate students and to do research is【are】 not in a completely rival part. For example, a big project or new research often can not be done by one person, so the professor always needs some student assistants. To these students, this is a good chance to put theory into practice. In other word, even in the research, the professor can educate students as well. So I consider doing research as an essential and practical way to improve the professor himself and【突出重点比较好】supplement academic education.【这个point很好喔】

What's more【前面有了what’s more，可以换一下词，比如 in addition 什么的】, if aperson's major role is to do research, we can call him a scientist instead of a university professor. As we all know that scientists spend almost totally their time on research and they do not have a duty to get the Information spread out. On the other hand, university professor are not free of cultivation and inspiration which are the essential duty of their position.【和scientist相比较，这个切入点不错。能有点论据说为什么是他们的本质职责会更好】

Admittedly, there are more and more professors immerse in their own study, but if they ignore the importance of education, they are not doing their job well and the university and parents will not allow them to do so. If the main role is not to educate, however, I believe that there will be no blame for the ignorance of education【不会指责忽视教育？双重否定。。】我想说“若育人不是main role就不会有老师家长的责备了（双重否定突出他们的天职就是教学），但我第一个词admittedly的确用的不好，没有让步关系，误导了”.【这一段的让步应该说的是professor有做研究的职责，第一句只说越来越多教授投入到他们的研究，这只是一个现象，并没有对此作出解释+后面说的如果叫兽忽视教育怎么怎么样。。。对于整篇文章结构上来说，这一段也构成不了让步了。】

In a nutshell, university profession's major role is to educate. Doing research is a way of university professor to be more professional and therefore to teach his or her students well, Which is a complement to the main role.【总结很好！，点明俩role间的关系】
【整篇文章立场是明确了，只是论证过程中，最好能突出point，多加些论据，还有让步那一段得注意下，比如说教授也有职责做研究说明为什么，然后再说但这并不代表他们可以忽视教育的职责】

-- by 会员 ykhjy (2012/8/9 14:49:09)

[/quote]

浅吟天

今天不写新作文，根据建议 重写了8月8日 独立
What is the main role of the university professor, to educate students or to do research?

思路：main role 是育人
1.从 “大学教授”这个名称可以看出主次。科研是充实教师自己知识，专业的方式。
2.若天天科研就是科学家，不是教授了。科学家不育人没关系，教师就失职了
3.育人科研并不矛盾。举例，需要学生助手，他们从中学东西。

Everyone has many roles in daily life, including the university professor. Some people hold that to educate students should be taken priority when a professor consider his role while others think that they should put doing research at the top of the agenda. From my perspective, I agree with the first opinion.

From the definition of university professor we can clearly see the anticipation of the public when creating this position. It means that a teacher who has professional knowledge and skills in the college that can be infused to students. So I think the main role of the professor should be to cultivate students. Although some professors spend lots of their time in doing research, spending precious time on the subject doesn’t mean this is the major point of their role. Actually Professors can discover new phenomenon from the research and get the cutting-edge information in a specific sphere. Thus, in this way, they can teach students the recent knowledge with professional insight. So I consider doing research as an essential and practical way to improve the professor himself.

What's more, if a person's major role is to do research, we can call him a scientist instead of a university professor. As we all know that scientists spend almost totally their time on research and they do not have a duty to get the Information spread out. On the other hand, university professor are not free of cultivation and inspiration which are the essential duty of their position, because if they ignore the importance of education, they are not doing their job well and the university and parents will not allow them to do so. However, if assuming the main role is not to educate, I believe that there will be no blame for the ignorance of education

Last but not the least, some people may argue that if professors put much emphasis on education, it will reduce their energy to do research, which is crucial for a teacher to be professional. Nevertheless, to educate students and to do research are not in completely rival part.s For example, a big project or new research often can not be done by one person, so the professor always needs some student assistants. To these students, this is a good chance to put theory into practice. In other word, even in the research, the professor can educate students as well.


In a nutshell, university profession's major role is to educate. Doing research is a way of university professor to be more professional and therefore to teach his or her students well, Which is a complement to the main role.

浅吟天

8月10日 独立
Some people say we should never be impolite to another person. Do you agree or disagree?


If the question asked was whether we should never be impolite to another person, and require an absolute yes-no answer, I think i will say no. Admittedly, we should not impolite to others randomly, but in some case impolite is acceptable or even necessary.

To begin with, sometimes impolite is inevitable. Imagining this picture, you have a quarrel with others. There will be no compromise. The best way to avoid the quarrel into a fight is using the serious or even impolite words to warning the opposite. Another example is that someone always harass your home, if
you are too polite and gentle to him, he will not afraid of you and doing the same things again and again, which is an unnecessarily big distraction. However, if you say to him you will call the police, maybe he will never appear in front of your house again. This cold face and impolite tune is a way to protect yourself from perpetual disruption. In this case, impolite behavior is somewhat necessary.

In addition, impolite is the smallest way to express dissatisfaction. A boss may act impolitely to his employees to express that he is not content about their performance instead of other more serious indecent behavior. Instead of firing the employee directly,from this impolite tone employees can detect where can be improved, and do it better next time. This strategy will not cause a high turnover rate.

Besides, in some circumstance, impolite behavior can be forgivable. For example, someone hears a bad new, such as losing a close friend or family member, he can not control himself and smooth the feeling when the news strikes him. If someone else talk to him at that moment, it is possible that he will give an impolite response or do not want to answer. But if he explain or even apologize for his impolite behavior, it' ok because we all made by flesh and blood. Thus everyone can understand him in that situation.

All in all, although impolite behavior has negative effect most of times, this doesn't mean that we should never be impolite. In some circumstance, impolite behavior is understandable.