小白求改PS，求选校。69党

Lexiie

LZ BACKGROUND：Toefl  91  GMAT660，GPA3。3+，国内一本大学，211，商学院全英授课。几个水实习
冲：北卡教堂山 FORDHAM  杨百翰
suny宾汉姆顿 阿尔巴尼
pace  hofstra clarkson
求意见，不知道靠谱吗？
全程自己DIY。昨天刚写好一篇PS，求指导，感激不尽！！

Dear Professor

I am a bachelor’s student of accounting in Liaoning University, a high-learning institution in China’s strategically important Province of Liaoning.All the classes are taught in English and all textbooks are written in English in my school,Sun wah International Business School.I would like to pursue Masters in Accounting in your distinguished program so that I can be assured a accountant career in my motherland.

My education so far is characterized by disputable excellence.During the four years of my undergraduate studies,my GPA was consistently top 10% in my class.As you can see from the transcripts of my academic record,my first year didn’t do well.I can still remember the day I got my scores.On the dinner table,my parents asked me what was going on and I just didn’t know how to answer it.,The whole forst year in my university,I didn’t find a thing to go forit.I was upset and unadaptable.So my parents asked me what was I most wanted.I thought carefully then got an answer,which was studying abroad.In China,studying abroad means pursuing advanced studies.That was exactly what I most wanted.Because it can not only rich my academic study but also open my eyes.What’s more,I can experience and toughening my physical and mental condition.So I worked harder an harder to keep on in the following years.In my third year,I drew a form of Balance sheet on the computer and printed it for 50 copies,them made them a book.So I can take notes and do homework on it.Because it can save us a lot of time drawing lines in practice when you are dealing hundreds of numbers and make the numbers clear.As you can see it below,

Assets	$	Liablities&Equty	$
Total		Total

it’s quite simple and no-intelligence uses.But when I used it for a while,all of my classmate found the advantages of it and asked me for one.I love the convenience ith can bring us in daily practice.

I also devoted considerable time to learning such subjects as law and economics.My extensive knowledge provided me solid grounding as I narrowed down my research interest to professional ethics of accountants.In a country that has only an inchoate legal regime governing professional practice,enforcing high ethical standards is both difficult and critical.But studies have been scant and haphazard so far,I am glad that I can make some contributions to the country’s discourse in the area.

In recognition of my academic and other strengths,I was honored to get some prizes and accolades during my undergraduate studies.In academic area,I won the Second Prize and Third Prize scholarships for three times.In other area,I won two singing contest in school and gave performances in parties for freshmen.I served as the literacy member in class.During my second and third year ,I joined Young Volunteer Association in school and served as the vice president.I arranged some activities such as supporting the education tutorial.Although there were some difficulties,for example,finding in-door toilets,as soon as we see the happy face of children,all of it were worthy.I am also a member of AIESEC for Liaoning Province.I love being volunteer and enjoy the feeling of giving help.

My undergraduate studies were greatly enriched with my internship in the Bank of China.My job is to help clients to solve anu professional questions. In the process, I learned not only to put my book knowledge in practice but also acquired how exactly the cash go in-and-out in a bank.I have a deeper understandingin both banking and accounting.That is,always be 100% energetic and careful to avoid any mistakes and errors.

In my master studies,/I still wish to focus my studies and researches on accounting.I heard of your university when I had the dream to study abroad,because I know your accounting program is marked selectivity and excellence.I hope that,by studying in your program,I will be able to build on my academic record so far for promising career as a qualified accountant in China a few years down the road.

Lexiie

求指导啊~~

zhaojian1135

Lexiie 发表于 2013-10-29 19:34
求指导啊~~

PS不是这样写的……

Lexiie

zhaojian1135 发表于 2013-10-29 20:48
PS不是这样写的……

那是怎么写的？

sunminxue

you should say more why this program is good for me, why your school is good for me, why i can succeed in your program. in addition, you should tell a story to attract the committee at the beginning of your PS.

楷楷楷

我也是DIY申的，收到了 Hofstra 的MSF 2014春季AD

panystateline

try to answer three questions:

1. why XX school? (why apply this program? how you fit in this program)
2. why you? (your goals, strength, ambition etc)
3. any sparkles that set you apart.

your format is cute, just not professional. remember you are applying for business school.

Good luck