1.27一战，才开始练作文，真心求教，CoopeR的作文贴，求共同进步！

cooperdw

As a student, there are many vital elements which we care during our school life: study , practice , and friends.we always make new friends by the time goes. Nowadays , there is a growing concern about which way is the best for us to make new friends .For my perpective, joining a sports team is suitable answer for this question.In this essay , I will analyze this issue and come up with some effective reasons to demonstrate it.
First of all, Sports team means competition . In order to win the championship in the tounament , the team will be established . In that case , the students who have the motivation to pursue the championship will gather because of the same goal : Win the games over and over again . they may not know each other before , but that is main point what I want to indicate , after two unfamiliar students join in the same team , they will get on well each other by practicing , training and fighting .For the ultimate goal, actually those communications will root their friendship deeply .On no account can we ignore the importance of the Goal motivation.
Moreover , there is other factor would be demonstrated , not one illustrating the influence of the Goal ,but one showing the subtlety of the same ‘language’ . For example , Jim and Tom both comes from the same school but different class . it is looks like there is no intersection among them . however , the two students , their favorite inclination is to play basketball . for any reasons, they were enrolled to join the school team , from that time , they know each other and play the b-ball with the team . after the training , they may discuss some certain skill which would ramp up their basketball skills even they are came from the different classes .In this sense , the so called ‘language’—basketball connects two persons because of the basketball team.
Finally, to join the sports team, the players will enjoy the victory together even the failure . everybody should the understand the taste of failure is disagreeable , offensive and discouraged .
Sometimes some of students will encourage us , telling us should not give up and try to make better next time by talking or a mail. Those schoolmates we may not know each other before . but I suppose that every singe one of team players will memorize them . and after they win next time , the players will appreciate the students who used to encourage them ,then a new friend has been made.
From what has been discussed above, we may safely draw the conclusion that Although during our school life there must be several ways to make friends : participating in community activities or traveling and so on , the best way is to be the player with your sports teammates.

cooperdw

Great friendship like the scarce green rose in the garden ,everyone yearn to pick it up ,however,the rude behavior may wither this flourish flower. Nowadays ,there is a growing concern about whether the unfriendly behavior may benefit the friendship among the peoples or not .for my perspective ,the answer is definitely negative .In this essay ,I will analyze the issues and come up with some effective reasons to demonstrate it.

First of all , the impolite behavior may leave a terrible impression to others .for instance , when you in the middle of class, you are concentrating on your lesion,somehow there has some students talking to each other loudly and they never detect the annoy around them . By bearing so much furious , you finally cannot restrict yourself and catch the pencil box which lie in front of you then cast it to the students who still ‘enjoy’ Themselves .For what you done, it is probably stop the students ,but it also makes other students know you are a crazy man, with impatient character and by that impression,they will not intend to talks with you.On no account can we ignore the value of the polite action to others.

Moreover , there is other factor would be demonstrated , not one illustrating the importance of good impression ,but one showing the subtlety of rude behavior may break the friendship. I think I display thousand cases to explain why treat your friends bad will result in the break among you and your friends, A friend who wishes to talk with you or to play with you indicating that they like do so because your perfect character or you can do something they prefer ,and for the pay back , you will get the same amount of treatment from your friend ,this called friendship. Only the ‘emeny’ will make others distasteful . by this reason, show your kindness to others without any rudeness will maintain your friendship.

Admittedly, sometimes the impolite action could help your friends who enter into a wrong pathway of their life . For instance , the person who you know are the drugster ,and no one wants to touch such a person . As a friend , you have no choice but punch him seriously and force him to the police station in order to give up those drugs. In this case, violent will play the justice in the life .

In conclusion , for few a time ,although the rude behavior will be a good reason to treat others , it is undoubtedly the polite action will lead to a better friendship .

lmylacoste

As a student, there are many vital elements which we care during our school life: study , practice , and friends.we always make new friends by the time goes(无此用法). Nowadays , there is a growing concern about which way is the best for us to make new friends .For my perpective, joining a sports team is suitable answer for this question.In this essay , I will analyze this issue and come up with some effective reasons to demonstrate it.
First of all, Sports team means competition . In order to win the championship in the tounament , theàa team will be established . In that case , the students who have the motivation to pursue the championship will gather because of the same goal : Win the games over and over again . they may not know each other before , but that is main point what I want to indicate ,à. after two unfamiliar students join in the same team , they will get on well each other by practicing , training and fighting .For the ultimate goal, actually those communications will root their friendship deeply .On no account can we ignore the importance of the Goal motivation.
Moreover , there is other factor would be demonstrated(两个谓语？) , not one illustrating the influence of the Goal ,but one showing the subtlety of the same ‘language’ . For example , Jim and Tom both comesàcome from the same school but 加介词different class . it is looks like there is no intersection among them . however , the two students（什么成分？）, their favorite inclination is to play basketball . for any reasons, they were enrolled（有主动形式，则主动比较好） to join the school team , from that time , they know each other and play the b-ball with the team（这句话又是没有连词） . after the training , they may discuss some certain skill which would ramp up their basketball skills even they are came from the different classes .In this sense , the so called ‘language’—basketball connects two persons because of the basketball team.
Finally, to join the sports team, the players will enjoy the victory together even the failure . everybody should the understand the taste of failure is disagreeable , offensive and discouraged .
Sometimes some of students will encourage us , telling us should（结构错） not give up and try to make better next time by talking or a mail. Those schoolmates we may not know each other before . but I suppose that every singe（什么意思？） one of team players will memorize them . and after they win next time , the players will appreciate the students who used to encourage them ,then（不是连词） a new friend has been made.（我没有见过make friends的被动诶）
From what has been discussed above, we may safely draw the conclusion that Although（小写） during our school life there must be several ways to make friends : participating in community activities or traveling and so on , the best way is to be the player with your sports teammates.



写的不错，虽然短了点，但是整体更好了，不过还是写长点好。

cooperdw

Health like a scarce green rose that every one yearn  to pick it up.Nowadays ,there is a growing concern about which is easier to maintain good health? In the past or in today ? for my prospective, I strongly believe that today’s situation is more appropriate to retain the health .In this essay ,I will analyze this issue and come up with some effective reason to demonstrate it.

First of all, A good health cannot live without exercise ,so many people feel sick because of they have no interest in body exercise,that’s a fatal problem. With the rapid development of career , the so called ‘white collar’ are more easier to get the carrer disease .fortunately , a huge number of physical gym and some kind of institution are established by the fashionable motivation .Owing to those gyms ,people could exercise any time they want , and for a lots of fitness gyms are interlock ,business man also could take body practice in the different cities. As a result ,from today’s new conception of sports, people like white collars are more easier to maintain good health than in the past.

Moreover , there is a other aspects , not one illustrating the physical gym agency ,but one showing the subtlety of assorted foods from today will provide better nutrition for people than from the past. It is obviously that under the background of ‘the foods as peoples primary element in their lives ‘ traditional sense , the Chinese diet industry boom with unimaginable speed . all kinds of restaurant which can provide more and more fresh food has been built in the cities such as steak ,vegetable salad , Chinese fancy dinner and so on.people could choose any prevailing meals they prefer. Those diet can provide more and more nutrition what people’s health really needs . because of that reasons, on no account can we ignore the influence of nutrition from today’s food.

Admittedly , the story from paragraph two . although the gym could be the well-being agency for office worker from today , however , it is unveiled that the work’s stress from today is unbelieveable larger than the stress from the past, thus we should look back and figure out the reason why white collar really need to take additional exercise ?

The root cause the requirement of work from today ,by the competitive principle . no body want to be fired by their boss , so they no has no choice but extremely working hard and careless their body ,owing to that terrible cycle , the so called career sick has been appear . In a other word , people from the past have no such heavy workload , that’s mean their should be more easier to keep their life healthy.

In conclusion , although the people from today have more and more ways to maintain their fitness than the people from the past ,it is hard to say those ways could really help them to keep the healthy , somehow I still believe the new-fitness-maintenance conception from nowadays.

cooperdw

The impressive presentation on work or school could be the miracle during our life ,only a few people could represent themselves in the public ,it will brings more and more concerns on us . if you grab a opportunity for the presentation , show the people how exceptional you are . nowadays ,there is a concern about when you are assigned a presentation , which do you prefer , work on it every day or wait until a big plan coming .for my perspective , prepare the work every day should take more advantages . In the essay ,I will analyze the issues and come up with some effective reasons to demonstrate it.
First of all , it is wise that working on the presentation every day will relieve the stress for other works . for instance, if you are a student from senior high school , there must has a lot of assignments after the class , so the tough thing is ,you get your homework done it primarily . then pay a another attention on your presentation’s work ,in the case that if you are waiting for the good idea popping out ,there must be a heavy workload for your presentations , so you will have no choice but work for it till the middle night. On the contrast ,you could divide the mission into several small parts , and try to work on each part for each day,that could makes your schedule regularly . On no account can we ignore the importance of the working each days .
Moreover , there is a other story to testify my hypothesis , not one illustrating the mitigating for daily pressure , but one showing the subtlety of the sufficient preparation . more aspects will support my point below : work on the presentation each day will allow you to collect the crucial informations patiently , sometimes you can discuss the uncertain perspectives in presentation with your teacher and classmates in order to shine your speech in the public, even ask someone to revise your defects of expression on your article .therefore, the more time you will pay , the more harvest you will receive . In this sense , it is undeniable that work on it everyday will definitely benefit your preparation.

Finally , Updating the informations from your presentation each day will make your article more fashionable and desirable . For example, the main point of your speech is to comment the current relationship between china and japan . For common sense we could provide the historical datas and background. However, the event of DiaoYu island which is the blasting fuse of collision between china and japan will make your speech more fruitfully and conspicuously . As a result , you should to pay a great attention on all of the world and pick the useful information to ornament your article .
From what has been discussed above , we may safely draw the conclusion that although the brilliant idea will allow you to finish the presentation effectively , scheduling the work each day is the best solution for your presentation.

45573asdasd

The impressive presentation on work or school could be the miracle during our life ,only a few people could represent themselves in the public ,it will brings more and more concerns on（bring to ） us . if you grab a opportunity for（of） the presentation , show the people how exceptional you are （好！）. （铺垫太长，可以删掉半句）nowadays ,there is a concern about when you are assigned a presentation , which do you prefer , work on it every day or wait until a big plan coming .for my perspective , prepare（preparing the work every day should take more advantages . In the essay ,I will analyze the issues and come up with some effective reasons to demonstrate it.

First of all , it is wise（obvious） that working on the presentation every day will relieve the stress for other works . for instance, if you are a student from senior high school , there must has a lot of assignments after the class , so the tough thing is ,you get your homework done it primarily（一句话里多套主谓关系） . then pay a another attention on your presentation’s work ,in the case that if you are waiting for the good idea popping out ,there must be a heavy workload for your presentations , so you will have no choice but work for it till the middle night. On the contrast ,you could divide the mission into several small parts , and try to work on each part for each day,that could makes your schedule regularly . On no account can we ignore the importance of the working each days .

Moreover , there is a other story to testify my hypothesis , not one illustrating the mitigating for daily pressure , but one showing the subtlety of the sufficient preparation（仁兄确定这是正确的句子吗） . more aspects will support my point below : work on the presentation each day will allow you to collect the crucial informations patiently , sometimes you can discuss the uncertain perspectives in presentation with your teacher and classmates in order to shine your speech in the public, even ask someone to revise your defects of expression on your article .therefore, the more time you willpay , the more harvest you will receive . In this sense , it is undeniable that work on it everyday will definitely benefit your preparation.

Finally , Updating the informations from your presentation each day will make your article more fashionable and desirable . For example, the main point of your speech is to comment the current relationship between china and japan . For common sense we could provide the historical datas and background. However, the event of DiaoYu island which is the blasting fuse of collision between china and japan will make your speech more fruitfully and conspicuously . As a result , you should to pay a great attention on all of the world and pick the useful information to ornament your article .（语句是好的，但是政治的东西尽量避面）
From what has been discussed above , we may safely draw the conclusion that although the brilliant idea will allow you to finish the presentation effectively , scheduling the work each day is the best solution for your presentation.
很不错啦，建议最后由一个让步，客观，很多亮点词汇，但是美中不足的是有一些的用法有问题，加油，来看看我的

cooperdw

The impressive presentation on work or school could be the miracle during our life ,only a few people could represent themselves in the public ,it will brings more and more concerns on（bring to ） us . if you grab a opportunity for（of） the presentation , show the people how exceptional you are （好！）. （铺垫太长，可以删掉半句）nowadays ,there is a concern about when you are assigned a presentation , which do you prefer , work on it every day or wait until a big plan coming .for my perspective , prepare（preparing the work every day should take more advantages . In the essay ,I will analyze the issues and come up with some effective reasons to demonstrate it.

First of all , it is wise（obvious） that working on the presentation every day will relieve the stress for other works . for instance, if you are a student from senior high school , there must has a lot of assignments after the class , so the tough thing is ,you get your homework done it primarily（一句话里多套主谓关系） . then pay a another attention on your presentation’s work ,in the case that if you are waiting for the good idea popping out ,there must be a heavy workload for your presentations , so you will have no choice but work for it till the middle night. On the contrast ,you could divide the mission into several small parts , and try to work on each part for each day,that could makes your schedule regularly . On no account can we ignore the importance of the working each days .

Moreover , there is a other story to testify my hypothesis , not one illustrating the mitigating for daily pressure , but one showing the subtlety of the sufficient preparation（仁兄确定这是正确的句子吗） . more aspects will support my point below : work on the presentation each day will allow you to collect the crucial informations patiently , sometimes you can discuss the uncertain perspectives in presentation with your teacher and classmates in order to shine your speech in the public, even ask someone to revise your defects of expression on your article .therefore, the more time you willpay , the more harvest you will receive . In this sense , it is undeniable that work on it everyday will definitely benefit your preparation.

Finally , Updating the informations from your presentation each day will make your article more fashionable and desirable . For example, the main point of your speech is to comment the current relationship between china and japan . For common sense we could provide the historical datas and background. However, the event of DiaoYu island which is the blasting fuse of collision between china and japan will make your speech more fruitfully and conspicuously . As a result , you should to pay a great attention on all of the world and pick the useful information to ornament your article .（语句是好的，但是政治的东西尽量避面）
From what has been discussed above , we may safely draw the conclusion that although the brilliant idea will allow you to finish the presentation effectively , scheduling the work each day is the best solution for your presentation.
很不错啦，建议最后由一个让步，客观，很多亮点词汇，但是美中不足的是有一些的用法有问题，加油，来看看我的

-- by 会员 45573asdasd (2012/12/30 9:05:09)

for instance, if you are a student from senior high school , there must has a lot of assignments after the class , so the tough thing is ,you get your homework done it primarily
这句话断句存在问题。但我认为句子本身应该不存在问题吧

政治话题应该尽量避免吗？ 多谢指教

45573asdasd

there must has a lot of assignments after the class 主谓宾全齐。到这地方就该是句号了。而且表达也有瑕疵。 there must has 没见过这样用的，查了查好像也没有。就算是对的，has和后面的复数也不一致
第二个问题有一定主观性吧，不一定就是不行。托福考试尽量展现正能量。个人觉得钓鱼这个问题，你和一个互相都是假想敌的国家谈这个，容易招致反感。风险太大，很不值得。

cooperdw

The great education is like a scarce green rose in the garden, everyone yarn to pick it up. Everyone wants to absorb lore from the famous professors just because the old and experienced person could import the so much certain knowledge to them . nowadays ,there is growing concern about a university professor should focus time on doing research or educating . for my prospective , paying a attention on education is the most crucial mission for professor . In this essay , I will analyze this issue and come up with some effective reasons to demonstrate it.
First of all, Only the youth could be the future of the nations . It is undeniable that the famous professor will play a significant role in some certain research , however , the talent juveniles ,whose protential capability will make them to perform the brilliant subjects researching or developing . for instance , Bill Gates , the CEO of Mircosoft , who show his innate ability in software development field when he was 12. He could the accomplish the complicated routines on his own ,those effort may cost a ten-people software team to done well. By the time files Gates became one of most famous entrepreneurs who could spush the economic construction in Unite states, so if the professors in the university could focus on how could select those geniuses in the certain field , they will cultivate more 'Bill Gates' for the nations.On no account can we ignore the importance of geniuses educations
Moreover , there is other story to testify my statements , not one illustrating the talent and the future , but one showing the subtlety of professor’s guidance for students . When there are some plights occur on certain subject researching , students will always be confused and feel no way to go through next step . if this moment the professors won’t assist their students by a correct theory revising . that is harmful for the students : they have no choice but spend more time to correct the mistake via taking the whole daytime in the library or summarizing the good experience after failing over and over again , all of this painful effort could only be replaced by professors warmest guidance . why not to do such the ‘piece of cake’ effort for students ?
Finally , on road of researching , sometimes the students needs a exemplary model . This model will not only show their unbelievable flair on certain researching but also represent the attitude towards the science . As we known , the young people will show their own talent on what they research , but the problem is sometimes they cannot be patient or calm when they confront the failure , this will result in a reckless habit for their research . However , the professors , could be the optimistic model ,showing more exemplary behavior on researching in order to tell the students just keep going by right attitude . In this sense , for the education , professor’s effort can not be neglected.
From what has been discussed above , we may safely draw the conclusion that the students education cannot going without professor’s focus . Although the certain research is more important for the professor even for the subject , there is no way to overlook the education’s meaning for the nations.

cooperdw

The reading and lecture both discuss the whether should replace the 5-day working for employees by 4-day working .the reading passage gives credence to the claim that it will benefit both employees and the company , the professor provides evidences contrary to this assertion.
It is mention in the passage that the shorten workweek could increase the profit of the company . The professor ,however, declares that it will spent more for company if use 4-days working.:Add more workers means there must be more training ,more office and more computers . that will cost so much for the company.
The next view made by the reading is that the 4-days work will reduce the unemployment rate .But the professor demurs about his idea, according to him, the 4-day work will make a lot of job unavailable for people .sometimes the company will ask the employees to finish the work by overtime . if that happens , the company will take more expectation on require the employee who can finish the 5-days workload in 4 days. If not ,the overtime will be taken.
Finally , to counter the assertion that the employee will get more free time to improve their life’s quality. The professor claims that it will take a risk for the 4-days workers ,because 4-days work will limit their capability of work . it’s harmful for their career . the 4-days work will lost job easier than the 5-days while company wish to hire the 5-days workers because they will bring more for the company .
In conclusion, the reading strongly believes that 4-days work will benefit the individuals and the company ; however , the professor refutes these evidences and provides her own proofs of this very fact.