Alex达不到29就是无。节。操。。。

chasedreamabc

8.1 独立 写得好慢的说，求打字超快的
People tend to hold different views on such trivial issues as which one they prefer, use e-mail or test message and use telephone or voice message, when they need to discuss upsetting or controversial problems with others. From my perspective, I fundamentally prefer to use telephone or voice message.

To begin with, communicating with people using telephone or voice message is faster and more convenient. It is known to all that you can call people in any circumstance without any restriction because you just need to dial the number of the person and begin talking. So using telephone to discuss upsetting or controversial problems make it available anytime especially the problems were in emergency and needed to be solved as soon as possible. Whereas, if you use e-mail or test message to discuss problems, people won’t receive the message until they check the mailbox, sometimes it maybe several hours later when they do this, so it will definitely exert bad influence and delay the best time to solve the problems.

In addition, telephone and voice message make it available to discuss in real time and make modification simultaneously. Since we need to discuss problems, telephone or voice message allow us to share our ideas and thought as we are discussing with each other, sometimes if we disagree with others and want to challenge them, we could just make feedbacks at once. Or sometimes, we are confused of others perspective we could ask them to interpret for us, since all of these happen in a shorter time by using telephone and voice message, we would acquire a deeper impression of the issue we are discussing. What’s more, talking through telephone, we can hear the voice of others directly and perceive the tone and emotion at the same time which will help us to make the right decision and choose what to say to sustain the harmonious atmosphere.

Admittedly, communicating with e-mail and test message would help to avoid many undesirable defects. For example, sometimes people who hold different idea on behalf of their own profit would have discontented mood or emotions to others or even quarrel with others when they are talking on telephone, and utilizing e-mail or test message would prevent such things happening because they just “talk” through the media of word. Or e-mail and test message would be able to record the content of their discussing. However, I think all of the above could be eradicated with some proper methods such as ask somebody to write down the conversation of the telephone and everything.

In conclusion, weighing the cons and pros, I would like to discuss questions with others by telephone or voice message because it is convenient and people can get feedback in real time and make adjustment synchronously.

gre呀gre

8.1独立

People tend to hold different views on such trivial issues as whichone they prefer, use（using吧- -） e-mail or test message and（我脚的改成or好一些） use telephone or voice message, when they need to discuss upsettingor controversial problems with others. From my perspective, I fundamentallyprefer to use telephone or voice message.

To begin with, communicating with people using telephone or voicemessage is faster and more convenient. It is known to all that you can callpeople in any circumstance without any restriction because you just need todial the number of the person and begin talking. So using telephone to discussupsetting or controversial problems make it available anytime especially theproblems were（我觉得用现在时are就行） inemergency and needed to be solved as soon as possible. Whereas, if you usee-mail or test message to discuss problems, people won’t receive the messageuntil they check the mailbox, sometimes it maybe several hours later when theydo this, so it will definitely exert bad influence and delay the best time tosolve the problems.

其实我刚开始也想到这一点了，但是后来觉得不对啊，telephone可以很及时，text message也很及时啊，email不及时，但是voicemessage也不及时啊，所以我觉得这一点有待商榷

In addition, telephone and voice message make it available todiscuss in real time and make modification simultaneously. Since we need todiscuss problems, telephone or voice message allow us to share our ideas andthought as we are discussing with each other, sometimes if we disagree withothers and want to challenge them, we could just make feedbacks at once. Orsometimes, we are confused of （with！哈哈哈终于找到你写错的地方啦！！！！！！！！）others perspective we could ask them to interpret for us, since allof these happen in a shorter time by using telephone and voice message, wewould acquire a deeper impression of the issue we are discussing. What’s more,talking through telephone, we can hear the voice of others directly andperceive the tone and emotion at the same time which will help us to make theright decision and choose what to say to sustain the harmonious atmosphere.

这两段都说的及时的问题啊，只不过一个是emergency一个是feedback，我觉得两段和成一段比较好，都是及时性，然后emotion的问题再单独分成一段会更好

Admittedly, communicating with（通过工具应该用through吧？）e-mail and test message would help to avoid many undesirable defects. Forexample, sometimes people who hold different idea on behalf of their own profitwould have discontented mood or emotions to others or even quarrel with otherswhen they are talking on telephone, and utilizing e-mail or test message wouldprevent such things happening because they just “talk” through the media ofword. Or e-mail and test message would be able to record the content of theirdiscussing. However, I think all of the above could be eradicated with someproper methods such as ask somebody to write down the conversation of thetelephone and everything.

让步段太长，老外都喜欢一边倒的文章，为了中肯可以加很短的让步。

In conclusion, weighingthe cons and pros（哎我喜欢这句！）, Iwould like to discuss questions with others by telephone or voice messagebecause it is convenient and people can get feedback in real time and makeadjustment synchronously.

前两段都是纯说理啊感觉，要不加个例子呗？

chasedreamabc

When it comes to the contributing factors that lead to the achievement of future career, the majority of people will maintain that well establishment connection with other people is more important than hard working at school. Never in Chinese history has the issue that how to manage to success in the career been more evident than that of today. When human being enjoy achievements brought by their life’s, isn’t it necessary that they give some consideration to what leads to their success? Considerable the advantages that connection with people results in are, they cannot compete with the benefits that studying hard at school brings about, when long-lasting accomplishment is taken into deliberation. As opposed to commonly accepted, I argue that hardworking at school is superiority to relate connection to other people. Among the countless factors why I advocate, I would explore only a few of the most essential aspects as follows.

To begin with, all indisputable evidences pile up to show that hardworking in study results in internal development of individual. Diligence to study means that a person might have a great chance to enhance the comprehensive ability that plays an important role in the career and earn a decent diplomat that is required to find a job and promoted in corporations. Take finding a job in the leading corporations as examples, the one that has not attend the school will not compete to the one that graduated from Yale University.

Another equally essential factor why I advocate my propensity is that the one can master different skills of coping with variety conditions through studying hard at school. A case in point relates to me is that I learn how to develop my communicating ability at school. When I study in the university, my professor, Dr. Smith, recommend me to take part in as many addressing competitions as I can to improve my communication. As a result, I master the skill that supports me to communicate well with people.

Superior as studying hard at school is, one can not deny the advantages that relating people brings about. First, under some circumstances, face to face communication do provide direct impression to people especially when the one are preparing get advance. Furthermore, well establishment connection with people can bring you more working opportunities and promoting chances.

Weighing the pros and cons of the issue, I can safety arrive at studying hard at school comes first. Only through studying hard at school can we develop ourselves and earn a bright future.

chasedreamabc

8.6 独立 27分钟只能敲出301 words,速度啊,飙泪
At present, the pressure of high school students is very big. They prepare college attending exam and do finish a lot of homework. Thus, some people think that high school students should not take a course on basic economics which only can take their burden that cannot care for. However, it is necessary for high school students to take a course on basic economics. My reasons are as follow.

First, high school students take a course on basic economics to broad their horizon. In the basic economics class, adolescences learn many classical theories which never they know it at before. So students can enjoy the theories and relax themselves during the period when they prepare to take an important exam.

In addition, learning a basic economics course in high school can help students study well in a future. For example, I took a basic economics subject in my high school. After I went to a college, I learn many economics classes. Due to the foundation, I study well in my school. What is more, I have got a national award during my college life. If not take a basic economics, I do not do the best in my major. Taking a basic economics subject is better for future.

Finally, learning a basic economics can develop the students’ hobbies. Never do people produce interest unless they know it. For instance, since they begin learning in their early age, when they graduate from their high school, they may know much than common person. Moreover, it will be a great chance for them to control a new skill. Consequently, they will be more knowledge about managing their own money and can control more ability.

In conclusion, for the short term and long term benefits, high school students should take a course on basic economics.

gre呀gre

8.6 独立

At present, the pressure of high school students is very big(换成high会好一些吧- -). They prepare college attending（一般用entrance） exam and do finish a lot of homework. Thus, some people think that high school students should not take a course on basic economics which only can（can only）take their burden（take one’s burden，没有这个用法，常用 be burdened with） that cannot care for. However, it is necessary for high school students to take a course on basic economics. My reasons are as follow（follows）. 让步段太长啦！

First（firstly一般用于书面语）, high school students take a course on basic economics to broad their horizon（horizons）. In（on） the basic economics class, adolescences learn many classical theories which never（加上do，这里是半倒，详见度娘文库第五页http://wenku.baidu.com/view/cf9f232fbd64783e09122b46.html）they know it at before. So（我记得谁跟我说不要用so来着- -） students can enjoy the theories and relax themselves during the period when they prepare to take an important exam（严格来讲，学生要准备的是考试本身，而不是take 考试的这个动作，所以我觉得改成prepare for the exam会好一些）.

In addition, learning a basic economics course in high school can help students study well in a（the）future. For example, I took a basic economics subject in my high school. After I went to a college, I learn（learnt） many economics classes. Due to the foundation, I study well in my school. What is more, I have got a national award during my college life. If not take a basic economics, I do not（cannot会好一些吧，毕竟虚拟了一下呢） do the best in my major.（这里加一个therefore什么的会更连贯）Taking a basic economics subject is better for future.

Finally, learning a basic economics can develop the students’ hobbies. Never do people produce interest unless they know it（我想了半天才明白，意思是说“如果人们不知道他们的兴趣本身是什么，他们就不会产生兴趣”，对么？这样的话改成unless they understand what the interest is for会更好点吧？）. For instance, since they begin（began） learning in their early age, when they graduate from their high school, they may knowmuch（more） than common person（改成the public或者the masses会更好）. Moreover, it will be a great chance for them to control a new skill. Consequently, they will be（have） more knowledge about managing their own money and can control more ability. 这一段的逻辑有点奇怪啊，前面说的是帮助发展兴趣，后来的例子说的是得到机会，两个感觉无关啊

In conclusion, for the short term and long term benefits, high school students should take a course on basic economics.

虽然字数勉强够了，但是真的写的没有以前好了，心理素质更重要啊亲，不要看着时间到了就草草结束，明显第一段和倒数第二段问题最多，尤其是倒数第二段，加油吧！

chasedreamabc

8.7 In order to solve the problems of the present and the future, people should review the past
I fundamentally agree with the statement that we should review the past to solve contemporary and future problems. While we studying history, we would acquire inspirations both for our routine problems and other facets, which would be even more crucial, within the frame of human society in a broader scope.

It is no doubt that the studying of history provides us methods and courage to tackle with what happened in our daily life in various aspects and then changes our lives. History presents us the most essential and precious ideas, values, and perspectives of ourselves and the world on which we would depend to solve any vexations and ticklers happened in our quotidian lives. We could seek for solutions to the problems, acquire support and advocacy to our different ideas and originalities, as well as truth ubiquitous around the world. Also, history teaches us lessons and experience so that many fallacies even tragedies would be eradicated within the process we study history. For instance, a child with ambitious dream would probably want to become an inventor adoring Edison inspired by his courage and tenacity when being confronted with failures. He would also want to be a doctor to release pain from people suffered with disease nowadays when he studies history of Black Death happened in Europe which despoiled tens of millions of lives. History is just like a beacon which gives us direction and guidance, and studying history we would have a better understanding of the connotation of our daily lives.

Besides, to study history is to excavate more profound and broader stratum in human society. For example, study lessons in historical wars will make our leadership more effective and efficient by avoiding mistakes made by previous commanders. The Chinese classical masterwork “The Art of War” written by Sun Tzu allows today’s commanders and even business leaders to obtain valuable information to improve their effect and profit in the future.

Not only the study of history will influence people beyond their daily life of historical lessons and experience as well as therapy to cure diseases, it also will help to solve environmental problems which vex people for decades. Retrospect to see the impacts people made by polluting the environment will show us valuable lessons on what would happen if we pollute the environment continuously without any constrain. Protecting the environment is one of the most urgent events that need high emphasis, and historical events like Three Mile nuclear accidents and Mexico oil spills has sounding the alarm to us and history will do us a favor and provides valuable advices.

To sum up, to study the history of human society, we would obtain inspirations and enlightenments to solve the problems of present and future which are similar with those happened before in many aspects.

gre呀gre

8.7独立 窝尽力了 窝实在是改不粗来了

I fundamentally agree with the statement that we should review the past to solve contemporary and future problems. While we studying history, we would acquire inspirations both for our routine problems and other facets, which would be even more crucial, within the frame of human society in a broader scope.

It is(there is) no doubt that the studying（直接study就行，可以做名词） of history provides us methods and courage to tackle with what happened in our daily life in various aspects and then changes our lives. History presents us the most essential and precious ideas, values, and perspectives of ourselves and the world on which we would depend to solve any vexations and ticklers happened in our quotidian lives. We could seek for solutions to the problems, acquire support（我觉得supports好啊） and advocacy to our different ideas and originalities, as well as truth ubiquitous around the world. Also, history teaches us lessons and experience so that many fallacies even tragedies would be eradicated within the process we study history. For instance, a child with ambitious dream would probably want to become an inventor adoring Edison inspired by his courage and tenacity when being confronted with failures. He would also want to be a doctor to release pain from people suffered with disease nowadays when he studies history of Black Death happened in Europe which despoiled tens of millions of lives. History is just like a beacon which gives us direction and guidance, and studying history we would have a better understanding of the connotation of our daily lives.

Besides, to study history is to excavate more profound and broader stratum in human society. For example, study lessons in historical wars will make our leadership more effective and efficient by avoiding mistakes made by previous commanders. The Chinese classical masterwork “The Art of War” written by Sun Tzu allows today’s commanders and even business leaders to obtain valuable information to improve their effect and profit in the future（in the future？前面不是刚说today么？）.

Not only（窝觉得这里变成弄成倒桩更炫啊！） the study of history will influence people beyond their daily life（lives？） of historical lessons and experience as well as therapy to cure diseases, it（改成but）also will help to solve environmental problems which vex people for decades. Retrospect to see the impacts people made by polluting the environment will show us valuable lessons on what would happen if we pollute the environment continuously without any constrain. Protecting the environment is one of the most urgent events that need high emphasis, and historical events like Three Mile nuclear accidents and Mexico oil spills has sounding the alarm to us and history will do us a favor and provides valuable advices.

To sum up, to study the history of human society, we would obtain inspirations and enlightenments to solve the problems of present and future which are similar with those happened before in many aspects.

chasedreamabc

TPO7
The lecture and the reading passage give contradictory opinions on the topic of ecocertification, a form of accreditation conferred by on international agency in recognition of a company’s eco-friendly practices. The passage explains that it is not necessary for American wood companies to pursue ecocertification while the lecture provides several counterarguments to this view.

First, the lecturer argues that the reading passage is too general in its statement that American consumers reject advertising completely. He asserts that Americans do not trust advertising claims for a product only when these claims are made by the company that sells the product. When a claim is made by an independent third party such as a wood certification company, he posits, consumers respond very positively with strong acceptance of the certified product.

The lecturer also refutes the second point in the reading – that price-sensitive American consumers are likely to choose cheap wood products without certification. The professor contends that certified wood is only slightly (less than 5%) more expensive than uncertified wood, and therefore, he argues, consumers will tend to ignore the price difference and choose the eco-friendly product.

Finally, receiving eco-certification is, according to the professor, an important strategy used by American wood companies to ensure that their products can compete against ecocertified wood products imported into the domestic market from foreign countries. According to the reading, however, this strategy is unnecessary because American consumers are likely to be content with domestically manufactured products, even if they are not ecocertified.

kchszy061ban

蓝色为意见或建议高亮为精彩绿色为总结红色为错误

The lecture and the reading passage give contradictory opinions on the topic of ecocertification, a form of accreditation conferred by on international agency in recognition of a company’s eco-friendly practices. The passage explains that it is not necessary for American wood companies to pursue ecocertification while the lecture provides several counterarguments to this view.

First, the lecturer argues that the reading passage is too general in its statement that American consumers reject advertising completely. He asserts that Americans do not trust advertising claims for a product only when these claims are made by the company that sells the product. When a claim is made by an independent third party such as a wood certification company（这个是instistution）, he posits, consumers respond very positively with strong acceptance of the certified product.

The lecturer also refutes the second point in the reading – that price-sensitive American consumers are likely to choose cheap wood products without certification. The professor contends that certified wood is only slightly (less than 5%) more expensive than uncertified wood, and therefore, he argues, consumers will tend to ignore the price difference and choose the eco-friendly product.（这里就是说只有当差别过大的时候才会考虑价格低的，5%只是一个特殊情况了）

Finally, receiving eco-certification is, according to the professor, an important strategy used by American wood companies to ensure that their products can compete against ecocertified wood products imported into the domestic market from foreign countries. According to the reading, however, this strategy is unnecessary because American consumers are likely to be content with domestically manufactured products, even if they are not ecocertified.

总体不错啊，就是细节要听全额，还是要练习听力。

Crystaljoy

ALEX！！你的文章深度再次超出我的理解范围了！！！
还有，你为什么总是用长难句用思维三级跳刁难我？！TnT
这样很不好的，万一考官也打个盹，你就没法make yourself understood了。

I fundamentally agree with the statement that we should review the past to solve contemporary and future problems. While we studying history, （while之类连词，要引导完整的句子。跟when 相比，while更强调同时性。）we would acquire inspirations both for（to） our routine problems and other facets（both and 不仅结构对称，意思上也是可以相提并论的，这里前后不合适吧？）, which would be even more crucial,（指代不明啊~even） within the frame of human society in a broader scope. （最后这个结构你是想强调范围之大吧。within the frame of human society在这里很突兀很诡异，表达也不地道。）
你看看你，简简单单的句子，主谓宾清晰可见，多好。写的太长太缠绵，就是容易出错。



It is no doubt that the studying（study） of history provides us （with）methods and courage to tackle with what happened in our daily life in various aspects and then changes our lives. // (First,) History presents (馈赠？endows) us (with) the most essential and precious ideas, values, and perspectives of ourselves and the world on which we would dependto solve anyvexations and ticklers happened in our quotidian lives. We could seekforsolutions to the problems, acquire support and advocacy to our different ideas and（，） originalities, as well as truthubiquitous around the world.// Also, history teaches us lessons and experience so that many fallacies even tragedies would be eradicated within(during) the process we study history. / For instance, a child with ambitious dream would probably want to become an inventor adoring (like否则的话你就是说“崇拜爱迪生的发明家”) Edison inspired by his courage and tenacity when being confronted with failures.（歧义啊，说的谁呢。移到a child 前面吧）He would（might） also want to be a doctor to release pain from people suffered with disease nowadays when he studies history of Black Death happened in Europe which despoiled tens of millions of lives（in Europe）. // Historyis，just like a beacon ，（改成插入语，目的是突出强调有实义的主谓宾）whichgives us direction and guidance, and studying history we would have（to） a better understanding of the connotation of our daily lives.



第二个分论点，关于历史给人courage来纠错的。例子根本不能支持论点啊!

·
Besides, to study history is to excavate more profound and broaderstratum（n. （组织的）层；[地质] 地层；社会阶层） in human society. // For example, study lessons in historical wars will make our leadership more effective and efficient by avoiding mistakes made by previous commanders（调到段末）. The Chinese classical masterwork “The Art of War” , written by Sun Tzu, allows today’s commanders and even business leaders to obtain valuable information to improve their effect and profit in the future. （achievement and generate the highest profit . ）其实你直接把commanders和business leaders分开两句说不更好，主语并列在一起，动宾不一样，这种句子理解着多麻烦。

这段主题句什么意思？

For example 后面直接跟例子，不要跟一个论点了!!!

Not only the study of history will influence people beyond their daily life of historical lessons and experience as well as therapy to cure diseases（快哭了，我始终看不懂你在表达什么。）, it also will help to solve environmental problems which vex people for decades.（后来问了晨依，你的意思是不是这样的：History study is to human beings what a therapy to disease.  The lessons and experince will not only influence  people's daily life, but also solve environmental problems vexing people for decades. ）Retrospect to（In retrospect，）see the impacts people made by polluting the environment will show(ed 追溯往事了) us valuable lessons on what would happen if we pollute the environment continuously without any constrain. Protecting the environment is one of the most urgent events that need high emphasis, and historical events like Three Mile nuclear accidents and Mexico oil spills has sounding（have sounded） the alarm to usand history will do us a favor and provides valuable advices.



And 连接的句子，究竟是否有并列或者递进关系呢？没有的话，就分成单句，用过渡词串联。

To sum up, to study the history of human society, we would(could) obtain inspirations and enlightenments to solve the problems of present and future which are similar with those happened before in many aspects.( ,if the similar situation were to arise once again.)



睡眼惺忪说几点感受：
1. 词汇新鲜，但是语言晦涩！宾语从句，定语从句太多了。把你乱七八糟的修饰删掉部分以后，反而觉得表意清晰多了。一个介词或者形容词能表达的就别用句子了，一个插入语一个条件句能隔开的就别尾随一串定语宾语从句了，用多了显得特别绕。主谓宾是主干，必须要清晰的亮出来，其他从句都是小枝干，锦上添花而已的。
2. 我觉得你的思维跳跃很大，读者得分层去理清意思。建议你用一些过渡词，连接词，体现出来你的逻辑链。但不要滥用and
3.每一段展开要紧扣主题句，例子要支持论点。如果写着写着感觉偏了就往关键词上回拢吧。