作文求拍，请各位大牛指点，谢谢~

georgeche

创意（being creative）比计划（planning carefully）更能找到解决问题的最佳途径
Being creative or planning carefully , which is more important to solve the problem .

Creativity is a unique ability that distinguishes human beings from other animals on the earth. Scientists have invented various machines during the development of the society with their creativity. In my opinion, being creative is more important than planning carefully when we are facing problems.
Creativity is being stimulated all the time when people receive education. Teachers always asked students to think wildly or do brainstorm when a question is asked. Students are encouraged to use their imagination and creativity to tell the answer. It is obviously that students are trained to think rather than to plan. I remember that all my school teachers had emphasized the significance of being creative. They often said that inventions cannot be planned, for example, two American scientists found the structure of DNA by using a new technique called Element Tracking, instead of the traditional methods. Without creativity, nothing new could ever be brought to human development and everything would be in a state of pale.

Moreover, the history has told us that creativity is a common character among scientists. Scientists, the inventors of the world, always succeed because of their creativity. Without the creativity, Sir Isaac Newton would not discover the law of gravity just by watching an apple falling down to the ground. He had never planned to discover the theory before. Without the creativity, James Watt would not invent the steam machine which stimulated the Industrial Revolution in Great Britain. He had never planned to observe the boiling water as well. Therefore, we can see that most scientists make contribution to the world due to their sparking imagination which could not be planned carefully. It was a sudden inspiration from creativity that gave them the right direction to research further.

Last but not least, not only the scientists need the creativity, but also the ordinary people need the creativity as well. When people meet a difficult problem in their work or study, the more creativity solution is, the more boss or teacher will be satisfied. The creative idea can always solve the problem more efficiently than traditional plan. Advertisement on TV should be one of the examples. An advertisement of Mercedes-Benz, the advertising slogan says that “the first brake that reads the street”. The potential meaning is that the Mercedes-Benz’s brake system is very nice. This slogan gives the consumers the deep impression to the Mercedes-Benz. So, the creativity can bring us a lot of surprise to the modern world.

The world without creativity is colorless and a person without creativity is dull. In conclusion, we need to explore our creativity in order to find the better solution to deal with the problems.

georgeche

自己顶一下

windypig123

Creativity is a unique ability that distinguishes human beings from other animals on the earth. Scientists have invented various machines during the development of the society with their creativity. In my opinion, being creative is more important than planning carefully when we are facing problems.

------开头简洁 OK。。but  face 应该用be faced with / be confronted with吧

Creativity is being stimulated all the time when people receive education. Teachers always asked students to think wildly or do brainstorm when a question is asked.
----有2个ask,.要么改前一个require  或者后一个 raised？

Students are encouraged to use their imagination and creativity to tell the answer. It is obviously that students are trained to think rather than to plan. I remember that all my school teachers had emphasized the significance of being creative----换做名词会更好吧 。还有这个时态 用过去时好。emphasized better(i think).

They often said that inventions cannot be planned, for example, two American scientists found the structure of DNA by using a new technique called Element Tracking, instead of the traditional methods .---不平行---instead of/rather than by traditonal methods...少了个by

Without creativity, nothing new could ever be brought to human development and everything would be in a state of pale.


Moreover, the history has told us that creativity is a common character among scientists. Scientists, the inventors of the world, always succeed because of their creativity. Without the creativity, Sir Isaac Newton would not discover the law of gravity just by watching an apple falling down to the ground. He had never planned to discover the theory before. Without the creativity, James Watt would not invent the steam machine which stimulated the Industrial Revolution in Great Britain. He had never planned to observe the boiling water as well. Therefore, we can see that most scientists make contribution to the world due to their sparking imagination which could not be planned carefully. It was a sudden inspiration from creativity that gave them the right direction to research further.
-----这段很好 但是我觉得这段的中心思想和上一段最后一句很吻合=。= 因为我觉得你上端不是说每次受到教育都会刺激创新吗 但是 最后又举例说2个科学家如何。我觉得有点不搭调 我觉得你上段可以举自己的实例 比如 你受教育的时候 老师如何激发你的潜能 让你如何受益  （其实我语文也不好 哈哈 只是提个建议）

Last but not least, not only the scientists need the creativity, but also the ordinary people need the creativity as well.  also 和 as well重了

When people meet a difficult problem in their work or study, the more creativity solution is, 这个。。more 修饰啥的？？？难道是更多创新的方法 还是更创新的方法？the more creative solution is??  the more boss or teacher will be satisfied.

The creative idea can always solve the problem more efficiently than traditional plan----traditional plan后面要补一个do。。
Advertisement on TV should be one of the examples. An advertisement of Mercedes-Benz, the advertising slogan says that “the first brake that reads the street”.---这个有点不明白，an advertisement of XXX, the adversting slogan....你认为这2个是同一个事物吗？（那个是同位语的形式）还是在an advertisement 前面 少些了个In ？？
The potential meaning is that the Mercedes-Benz’s brake system is very nice. This slogan gives the consumers the deep impression to the Mercedes-Benz. So, the creativity can bring us a lot of surprise to the modern world.

The world without creativity is colorless and a person without creativity is dull. In conclusion, we need to explore our creativity in order to find the better solution to deal with the problems.

总的结构 思路都很清晰 而且语言很多出彩的地方
只是我觉得你的例子说服力不是很强。。。我觉得T的作文吧 多整点个人例子 或社会上那种很潮流的例子 比如啥芙蓉 凤姐之类的。。。
加油啦！！！
PS:以上仅个人建议呀

georgeche

谢谢建议

georgeche

还有大牛拍一下吗？