TWE001, 第一篇文章。超时10分钟。水平不高欢迎拍转

Joypan

etc.和and so on之类的最好不要用。因为你前面已经举例说明了，没有必要再etc.了。TWE是类似学术论文形式的，所以，语言最好严谨一些。

对，别用缩略形式，否则显得很不正式。

Joypan

第一段：

More and more people are attending university to meet the requirement of modern society and the job market now. Most students may have not thought of “why go to university” before they enter college. I think it’s necessary for us to think over this before we go to college in order to find out is it worth to spend a big amount of money to study in university. In my opinion, attending college does not only ensure us knowledge, but also act as a transition between the absolute academic environment of high school and the society. It benefits us a lot because we can get more experience and meet people with different backgrounds as well as study knowledge.

我记得以前在GTER看TWE的时候，当时看到的是用now 优于nowadays,因为后者的范围比较不明。指当代。

worth的用法，我记得好象是be worth to do .

sum of money读起来，好象有些别扭。

ensure和本来的acts没有平行。

it指代不明。

study knowledge有点Chiglish的感觉。

还有就是，因为整篇文章是你写的，所以，不用经常加我认为，我觉得等等之类的短语。或者你用其他的，不要经常用I THINK，至少用用AS FAR AS I AM CONCERNED之类的。

[此贴子已经被作者于2006-8-25 20:52:16编辑过]

charmant

非常感谢！受益匪浅！

Joypan

以下是引用charmant在2006-8-25 21:07:00的发言：
非常感谢！受益匪浅！

不客气。。觉得我改的还是有理的就好。。。。

Joypan

后面的几段，charmant你要不再自己研究研究，然后我们再探讨一下？

pumpkin

以下是引用Joypan在2006-8-24 21:50:00的发言：
已阅.