[求助]TWE008--请多指教!

belindaxiao

【求助】我的Twe－008

唉,花了近60分钟才勉强写完一篇作文,失败!请大家教教我,非常感谢!

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?Television has destroyed communication among friends and family ,use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion

The invention of television has changed the way people live. Television, along with its wide availability, increasingly prosperous programs has attract people to spend much time watching on it. Thus the controversy on if television has destroyed communication among friends and family appears. In my point of view, television is useful to communicate with friends and family rather than destroy the communication.

Nowadays, television has become more and more popular in our daily life. Various television programs not only enrich our leisure life but also create many chatting subjects for us. Talking about the news, the soap drama or football games which you watched would make you be welcome in your friends or family. And sometimes you may lose your voice in your family or friends without taking part in chatting with them about one of the TV programs which you don’t watch. Moreover, talking about a popular program on TV make people feel more ease with new friends.

Television also provide more chances for people to stay with friends or family. Many people like to watch TV with friends or family to share feelings about the program showed on TV. I guess no one would like to watch the Olympic games by himself without sharing the excitement when someone wins the game. Watching the performance of  spring festival celebration together and sharing the happiness of new year’s coming surely promote the communication.

Furthermore, there are more and more TV programs which are designed to attract people to take part in them . For example, there is a program named happy family on channel 4 . It is a match to  win the title of happy family and if you want to attend it, you may need to prepare it with your family and attend it with your family . It is obviously that attend such kind of program promote communication with your family and that is also the intension of this program.

Although people happens to refuse to go out with friends because of one of the attractive programs on TV, we cannot judge subsequently that television is harmful to communicate with friends . It has been clearly verified by what I have discussed above that television has not destroyed communication among friends or family. Oppositely, the excessive TV programs promote people’s communication by the increased topics and the power of making people stay together watching TV.

[此贴子已经被作者于2004-12-6 22:59:23编辑过]

guandream

以下是引用belindaxiao在2004-12-6 22:13:00的发言：

【求助】我的Twe－008

唉,花了近60分钟才勉强写完一篇作文,失败!请大家教教我,非常感谢!

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?Television has destroyed communication among friends and family ,use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion

The invention of television has changed the way people live.(need more information to connect  these two sentences: lifestyle and program) Television, along with its wide availability, increasingly prosperous programs has attract people to spend much time watching on it. Thus the controversy on if television has destroyed communication among friends and family appears. In my point of view, television is useful to communicate with friends and family rather than destroy the communication.(the theme is clear)

Nowadays, television has become more and more popular in our daily life. Various television programs not only enrich our leisure life but also create many chatting subjects for us. Talking about the news, the soap drama or football games which you watched would make you be welcome in your friends or family. And sometimes you may lose your voice in your family or friends without taking part in chatting with them about one of the TV programs which you don’t watch. Moreover, talking about a popular program on TV make people feel more ease with new friends.

good point

Television also provide more chances for people to stay with friends or family. Many people like to watch TV with friends or family to share feelings about the program showed on TV. I guess no one would like to watch the Olympic games by himself without sharing the excitement when someone wins the game. (I disagree your idea)Watching the performance of  spring festival celebration together and sharing the happiness of new year’s coming surely promote the communication.

Furthermore, there are more and more TV programs which are designed to attract people to take part in them . For example, there is a program named happy family on channel 4 (where?) . It is a match to  win the title of happy family and if you want to attend it, you may need to prepare it with your family and attend it with your family . It is obviously that attend such kind of program promote communication with your family and that is also the intension of this program.

Although people happens to refuse to go out with friends because of one of the attractive programs on TV, we cannot judge subsequently that television is harmful to communicate with friends . It has been clearly verified by what I have discussed above that television has not destroyed communication among friends or family. Oppositely, the excessive TV programs promote people’s communication by the increased topics and the power of making people stay together watching TV.(excellent conclusion)

the essay is not bad, and I like the conclusion.

practice makes perfect

dengsida

Will it be better to change "you" into people , person...?