【老帖新开】奋斗的道路没有尽头之*写作练习*

一粒黄豆。

kimwang53 发表于 2013-4-7 18:08
过来支持一下！一战710，so cool~ 祝杀T成功！加油

谢谢~~~ 你也加油~~

一粒黄豆。

有决心的人，不需要问别人。
有决心的人，不需要跟人讲。
中间发生的破事不讲了，不是我要focus的点，不要让没有意义的事distract me

给自己定两条规矩，1.在别人没有邀请的情况下，不要提意见。  2.自己的决心用来敦促每天的学习，不需要跟别人提起，也不要多费口舌。

I will prove myself. You will see.

一粒黄豆。

I should post in English, but the following opinion is hard to express in English, so i decided to broke the rule once.

3,5心得，
3
一句话讲reading内容，一句话讲people的态度
  一句话概括一个态度，一定是概括。然后用2句话解释这个态度。
  一句话概括另一个态度，然后2句解释。
一共8句话。

5
1-2句描述problem，一句话solution
  一句话自己的立场first/second solution，在纸上写下来，不要说错。
先说 支持的solution的好处，2-3句。
后说 反对的solution的坏处，2句。
一共8句话。


关键
第三题，听得时候注意意见提出者的主要评价句，作为speak时态度的概括句。
第五题，注意材料对不同solution的评价，记在自己的观点里。用材料的顾虑来攻击不好的solution，自己想一个办法来解决支持的solution的问题。

一粒黄豆。

Technology
Prehistoric humans had an average life expectancy of around 20 years. A difficult question has consumed abundant research for many decades.
A young man starts a career, or begins to learn to be socially and financially independent, when he or she is twenty-something. This is a time that a person’s social life formally begins. But looking into our remote past, according to anthropological studies, our forefathers in the stone age, had already journeyed to the end of their lives. Why there is such a sea change in terms of our life expectancy? The answer is multifaceted.
Thanks to the development of modern agriculture, people are now eating better and healthier than they ever did before. Generally speaking, with the growing availability of meats and egg products, the amount of nutrition the average human eats has increased continuously. In addition, people nowadays have begun to recognize the importance of quality and balance when it comes to nutrition. Nowadays professions such as nutritionist or dietitian have arisen, highlighting how modern man not only eats to survive, but also to enjoy and maintain health.
Development of medical science. Illnesses like smallpox were considered fatal up until early 1980s. Since then the disease has been eradicated. Incurable disease can now be treated within days. An improved health care system is now protecting people from common disorders like flu or fever, and modern medicines are widely available to the general population.
The invention of airplanes has benefited us the most dramatically.
Despite its relatively recent appearance, the airplane has revolutionized our concept of travel. It is the very first time in human history that …
Thanks to the airplane, the time spent in traveling has been reduced significantly, especially when it comes to inter-continental traveling. One thing is for sure: if Phileas Fogg lived today, he certainly wouldn’t bet his journey around the world on 80 days.
The invention of the airplane has made casual long-distance travel possible. Such a voyage was not only considered tome-consuming, but also dangerous. Thanks to this new means of transportation, what used to be a once in a life-time adventure is already considered a weekly routine by many people around the world. In other words, the appearance of the airplane has made the world “smaller”.
This new vehicle has not only changed the way we travel, but also altered our way of thinking about travel. With the tremendous amount of time saved, we are now able to do more businesses and complete more tasks within the same period of time. All in all…
Progress is agonizing to some extent; however, it is inevitable and is always good in the long run.
The world has been witnessing progress, either steady or dramatic, for all of the history. Most prominent forms of progress is the rapid development of science and technology. With the help of modern scientific techniques, we are able to keep in touch with our family members who are living miles away, make marathon phone calls or chat on the internet. In contrast, people in ancient times had to transmit signals by torches or send messaged by pigeons. Technology not only shortens the distance between global citizens but also assists in extending the longevity of human beings. More advanced medical facilities … more effective pills are available to treat those fatal disease that used to be incurable.
The progress in the humanities and social sciences such as philosophy, archeology and anthropology also made their mark. We have found many new fields of inquiry such as psychology and sociology to better understand our individual and social realities.
It should be admitted that progress has a flip side.
Nevertheless, it is always good in broad terms and in the long run.
科技带来的问题
Constantly checking wireless mobile devices can lead to obsessive-compulsive disorder(强迫性精神障碍) ,claims a California psychologist in his new book.70% of those who report heavily using mobile devices experience “phantom vibration（幽灵震动）syndrome”, which is what happens when you feel your pocket buzzes and there’s no phone in your pocket .The book focuses on mental health challenges linked to heavy technology use ,including smartphones and social media sites.过度依赖智能手机和社交媒体等新技术对人们精神健康的影响。
网络个人信息发布给人带来的负面影响
Whether it is photos , personal status or unwanted comments, 90% of Americans think people “overshare” personal information online ,a survey by Intel Corporation showed. Most US adults said they are vexed by people who complain constantly and post inappropriate or explicit photos and private information .About 85% of Americans post information online and a quarter do it every day ,according to the servey.

Along with the tremendous benefits that the automobile has brought to us, automobile also poses a serious threat to people’s health and the environment.
undesirable consequences.
Although our government has imposed a mandatory installment of catalytic converters on every vehicle,
The polluted air is posing a serious threat to people’s health.
This is especially true in the fields of education and science.
Many people can study at home without spending money or time attending a University.
We are living in the fast-pacing and everyday-refreshed world that is surrounded by new technology springing up everywhere in the modern time.
Electricity, telecommunication, television, modern transportation patterns, etc., have been dramatically changed our lives and influence our ways of thinking.
The daily errands that took hours now only take a matter of minutes.
Cities with high-rises boom up owing to the inventions of cranes and cement. The invention of cell phones makes you available to your business partners and friends.
The communication revolution has made it easy for people to get information and communicate at an unprecedented speed. What used to take hours of searching through libraries can suddenly be done in a matter of minutes on the internet.
Health
Because health is so vitally important to our ability to accomplish any, and every, other life goal, I do several things to maintain my good health. I eat healthily, exercise regularly, and get enough sleep.
Skip a meal
Eat a balanced diet
Regular and plentiful sleep is also a key to good health. staying up late can be harmful to the metabolism.
I learned to detach myself from stress by growing flowers
The maintenance of good interpersonal relations and proper relaxation through hobbies endow me with mental health.
Environment
保护资源
By 2030 the combined capacity of 2 planets will not be sufficient to support global demand unless a step change in consumption patterns can be delivered ,according to the World Widelife Fund .

Work by hand
Only our hands can perform with full dexterity, only our hands can express emotions through our work, and only our hands do not suffer from unexpected breakdowns.
Indeed machines can assemble intricate computer chips and operate in extreme conditions. In daily life, however, I find that my trusty hands are capable of solving my quotidian problems with unparalleled ease.
Not only are our hands more skilled, but they can also create artistic objects which represent our passions and desire.
For example, a study done by the University of Chicago concluded that….
Our hands do not face the critical weakness of machines: they do not accidently stop working properly because of computer viruses; they do not need professional mechanics to do maintenance; and they certainly do not need to be discarded because a newer version has been introduced. In addition, unlike machines, our hands are free and require no extra upkeep beyond what required for our body as a whole.



缺乏阅读和思考对人的负面影响
88.6% of people say they are surrounded by all-rounders or jack-of-all-trades(煎饼人，门门通门门松), and 27.7% admit that they themselves are part of that grouping, according to a survey into over 10,000 people .When asked why there are so many all-rounders ,54.1% of people say it is because people are becoming increasingly fickle(浮躁)and spend less time in reading and thinking.


语言表达的重要性
Wisdom is a tree that grows in the heart ,and its fruit appears upon the tongue .---German philologist , Friedrich Diez
智慧是一颗树，它根植于心中，结果在舌上。

speaking tips
Question 3
Your answer could go like this:
“The school has implemented a new policy that ... due to ... . And the
man/woman holds a positive/negative view towards the announcement.
The first reason s/he gives is that ... . And the second one is based on the
fact that ... .”
Useful tips:
☛In the reading part, DO NOT waste your time on taking notes, it is
unnecessary. Just figure out what the announcement is mainly
talking about, you do not need to say anything about it after all.
☛When listening, just write down THREE major points--attitude, reason
1 & reason 2. You can use “+” and “-” to represent positive attitude
and negative attitude.
☛Make sure that you get ALL the reasons that the man/woman gives.
Any thing missed will lower your score.
☛DO NOT spend too much time explaining why the school has pull out
the policy, simple words would be fine.
☛DO NOT spend too much time retelling the first reason, you should
finish talking about it in 20 seconds.

Question 5
In question 5, you are asked to paraphrase the man/woman’s problem
and then retell the solutions that the woman/man comes up with. And
for this time, you should make a choice between the two.
Your answer can go like this:
“In this conversation, the man/woman is having a hard time dealing
with the problem that … . And the woman/man offers him/ her two
possible solutions. One is … . The other is … . And if it were my choice, I
would choose the former/latter one, because ... .”
Useful tips:
☛The OPTIMAL time allotment is: 10 seconds for the problem, 17
seconds for each solution, and 10 seconds for your choice and why,
and about 6 seconds pausing throughout your answer.
☛DO REMEMBER that you HAVE TO state your opinion in your answer.
BUT do not spend too much time on that.
☛Make your answer as SIMPLE as it can be, you really don’t have
enough time to cover everything mentioned in the conversation.
☛DO say “the man/woman offers her/him TWO(or THREE) solutions.”
This is to ensure that you get all the solutions even if you can’t finish
you answer in time, so the examiner will still give you a good score.

一粒黄豆。

Good news~ I get 7 in IR section, and 5 in AWA.
However, actually I felt I did a bad work in IR section, I skipped a lot of questions(at leat 5). But finally I got 7!!!
So this tells us that sometimes we can't rely on our feelings
Hope I can get a higher score in verbal section

一粒黄豆。

大家经常误以为“on the one hand”和“on the other hand”之间有递进或者并列的关系。事实上，这一对短语一般是用于提出两个相反的事物和看法（introduce two contrasting points, facts, or ways of looking at something）。



我们对比下面两个例子：

正确的使用：

On the one hand, if the body doesn't have enough cholesterol, we would not be able to survive. On the other hand, if the body has too much cholesterol, the excess begins to harden the arteries.



大意：从一方面讲，如果身体没有足够的胆固醇，我们不可能生存。从另外一方面讲，如果身体的胆固醇过高，血管可能硬化。

一粒黄豆。

I've collected enough material for writing, at least 80% of the required and highly tested topics.

I have to read them every day and read as more model essays as I can, finishing 2 model essay books in following week. Another book teaching students how to write good essay will arrive tomorrow, so I really have to make time to read that one~

After all, if I improve the intensity of reading and writing , it is possible for me to accomplish my plan. After that, my level should have been decided. So there is nothing to be worried. Just do as I planed.

In the meantime, I will continue practicing 3-6 in speaking section. To be honest, I don't want to touch the 1&2. 80 topics....omg... I'd rather waiting for jj, and at about 4/25, I will begin practicing 1&2 regardless whether jj has come out or not. If not, I will practice 80 topics first.

At about end of April, I will begin practicing listening section using TPO left. By the way, no matter how easy is reading section, I should at leat read all the TPO readings to show my respect for reading

And the last 10 days will be used to practice all the sections.

All in all, I allow no failure this time.

一粒黄豆。

算是一点经验吧。托福作文追求什么？ 信息量！ 你要让你的作文informative。
一篇文章里必须至少有一个具体的例子。
有两个例子，文章内容就很充实了。加上适当的论证。清晰的结构。4分没问题。

例子一般有虚例，实例这两种。
虚例，就是一种假设的情况，没有具体的人物时间地点。就像口语部分lecture中，professor也经常给出这种虚例。

实例一般分为自己的和别人的这两种。
别人的可以是历史上名人的，流行的时事。
自己的可以是本人的，也可以是朋友的，听说的，总之是发生在生活中的。

这些例子其实没有好坏。看自己怎么准备。有一些例子，从不同的角度，可以有不同的理解，用于不同题材的段落。


托福作文不要一味追求丰富的词组句子，这些纵然很重要，但最实质的还是information，你作文的结构框架，你的观点，支持观点的例子。
从各种考试越毒，尤其gmat，就可以看出，在美国人眼里，一篇标准的文章就是清晰的结构，明确地观点，还有就是例证。

在内容的基础上，背一些词组句子，看一些范文，写完文章不要就算了，要改。把很土的词upgrade，把很朴素的句型也改得花哨一些。
一篇文章如果有充实的内容清晰的框架和观点，再加上一些亮点词语，句子。尽可能避免语病。就可以达到4分了！

一粒黄豆。

虽然一战独立作文已经4.0-5.0了，但不能排除运气的因素。
这次是我的最后一战，不允许任何意外情况。我把话撂着了，必须28分。
综合写作以前弱在听力，词汇量虽然够越毒，但会用的少。
这次会针对性地制作模板，背一些类别的词汇来使用。加之听力也较以前有很大提高。4分也不是问题。

那么两个四分，就有28了。 fighting

一粒黄豆。

再来说说口语。
conversation的那两道，没什么问题。
lecture最近一直遭遇说不完的窘境。

对于口语部分的笔记，现在有了新的看法。不是越多越好，而是有重点地记。主题要有，框架要有，支持主题的主要细节。
不要试图什么都记，这样一方面可能错过重要的内容，另一方面，由于笔记很多很乱，在20秒准备的时候常常看不懂记了什么，或者说不完。
通过控制笔记的量，一方面提升记录的质量，另一方面也控制时间。

3456接下来我会一套一套做。在考试前估计能把tpo做完。

最后还剩下12，说实话以前真的很怕。但其实第一题，抛弃固执的想法，用通俗的例子，套在不同的题材上，根据前人的经验，35个足以。
第二题，类似作文题。经过最近作文提纲的联系，思路拓开了，不至于没话说。

接下来很重要的是流利度。

相信只要努力，提高4分不是梦。

加上有jj帮忙呢~