lmylacoste的作文贴，求狠该,今天机经写作一起开始！

lizchang1990

There is perhaps no issue more controversial than this one whether people need to tell their friends everything without any omittance or fakeness. A myriad of responses people may have on the topic concerning the issue regarding the degree of being honest. Although the individual's taste does differ, the view ruling the roost in my mind is that honesty should be the primary consideration.

First of all, the top of the list of my mind is that the honesty is intrinsically tied with the friendship. From common sense and the experience from the daily life, it is not far away to know that only you are honest, other people will give you the trust(感觉直接用trust you吧,这个表达有点中式化) which is the foundation of the comradeship(这个词很高级,但指的是那种出生入死的朋友关系,感觉这次用大了). To make my demonstration more comprehensive, I would like to refer to inspiring experience of my own from which my point can draw strength. When I lived in a small neighbourhood neighborhood, most of children living there are known each. Once when I was playing football, a(小粗心) inadvertent shoot hit the window of a family. Undoubtedly(这个词没必要), if the case was heard by my parents, they would punish me. However, I did not try to cover (加个up)my fault, but(这个转折多余,去but) on the contrary, I conceded to that family that the broken window was caused by my carelessness. Although I was scolded as having expected, the honest behavior earned me a good fame and a group companions.(实话是你这个例子举偏了,你说的friendship,后面貌似没咋的强调这一点,只说到你很诚实,而不是体现你与朋友间的诚实)

In addition, another compelling point worth being mentioned is that honesty will enhance cooperation and the efficiency, as one of my friends aptly illustrates. He is a guy with many friends because of his honesty. And thanks to the good character, we will not hesitate to work together with him. He would tell nothing but the real opinions which sometimes are very precious and point out the current problems which is not easy for others, (去掉前面逗号吧~不然你这个修饰都感觉不知道对应哪个了)who are afraid to offend their friends, to propose, helping us to reveal the core of the factor impeding the proceeding.(前面整句都有点混乱了哟~你to/ ing 不知道接何前词) The reply from my part-and-parcel of life may lead those who have been told for so long by so many, who are cynical, fearful and doubtful, to put their hands on the arc of trust toward the point that honesty will bring about more than you can expect.

Admittedly(其实admittedly后面一般接不好的东西,再接好的事物,你这地方用错了哦), it is necessary for us to cut short the relentless paces toward the assertion until the opposition has been taken into consideration. Human nature being what it is, someone will argue that complete honesty is far from a character we should strive to have since the inproper improper honesty will hurt others. There is not better illustration than this one. My friend never told the lie and the consequence was that he had no intimate mates. Despite the staggering result, the reason was obvious that the honesty would sometimes contradict the self-image. And a people do not flatter others by acclaiming something untrue is not likely to get the others' favor. But the weakness of the human nature is so occasional when you are in such a developed and civilized world that it cannot constitute a sufficient support for the adverse side. After weighing the pro and con, the striking upshot is that being genuine is a vital key to treat friends.

看的出你的词汇很丰富,句式比较复杂~ 但怎么说那个模板痕迹还是有的. 最后一段拆开写会更好~ 结尾就直接概括你的观点就OK了~

lmylacoste

The reading casts light on the topic that the salvage logging will bring about benefits to the damaged forest and to the local economy. The professor's lecture covers on the same topic, yet with the totally opposite attitude. Likewise, the professor utilizes three distinctive reasons to justify her perspective.

First of all, the professor refutes the idea in the passage that salvage logging will help to remove the dead trees and make enough rooms, which otherwise is occupied by the dead trees, for the new fresh trees. On the contrary, the professor asserts that salvage logging is just a oympic myopic measure. That is to say, it lacks long-term benefit. To be specific, her claim is grounded on the fact that these dead trees will release many nutrients into the soil in the progress of the decomposition.Once the trees are moved out, the conditions for future generation trees will not be ideal. Apparently, the professor's point is incompatible with the reading passage.

In addition, as well-defined as the points made in the reading material, the professor's statement once again contradicts the reading. She contends that the decline of the insect population caused by salvage logging will not be beneficial to the forest. The spruce bark beetle has lived for a long time in the forest, but they do not make any serious damages. And the lost of the habitat, which the decaying wood can be, will result in the loss of contributors like birds and beneficial insects. And the total effect of salvage logging will be negative on the forest. Clearly having taken this fact into consideration, the professor has sound doubts on the reading.

What's more, the reading pinpoints that salvage logging will have economic benefits. The professor challenges the point by arguing that the economic benefits are questionable. To verify her point, she claims that most wood can only be moved out of the forest by machines like helicopter which is very expensive. Besides, the outside workers who are more experienced and have more training than the local residents are favored, so it is not possible for salvage logging bring the economic benefits. Evidently the credibility starts to shrink, after the reasons have been taken into account.

In sum, the professor not only discerns the drawbacks of the argument and takes one more step to reveal that the fallacious argument needs a closer scrutiny

lizchang1990

lmylacoste ,我11.17的作业链接哦!  O(∩_∩)O哈哈~ 今天我俩全全互改!

http://forum.chasedream.com/TOEFL_Writing/thread-781814-4-1.html#last

辛苦你了~~我10:30样子回来给你批改哦~~ 等你作业!

lmylacoste

With the development of the science and technology, there is perhaps no issue more controversial than this one whether or not working in company is much better than in home. A myriad of responses people may hold on the topic concerning the issue regarding the place for work. Although the individual's taste does differ, the view ruling the roost of my mind is that working in office is the prior choice.

First of all, the top of the list of my mind is that the working place is intrinsically tied with the efficiency. And compared with home, office will provide a harmonious and progressive atmosphere which will enhance the cooperation among workers. From common sense and the experience from our daily lives, most people will finish the assigned job and accomplish the missions. To make my demonstration more comprehensive, I would like to refer to the experience of my own from which my point can draw strength. During a summer holiday, I was an employee in a real estate company. At first, the heavy work nearly made me stroke and even my boss did not think I could insist until the term ended. But thanks to the help from my partners and the examples they set for me, I was inspired to work harder and finally I earned myself a precious praise from all the staffs.

In addition, another essential point worth being mentioned is that working in company will help you to set a healthy schedule as one of my friends aptly illustrates. My friend Jack worked in a network firm and he was really qualified for that position. But after a new plan that the most efficient workers will can choose to finish their job in home from his corporation, a encouraging policy to inspire the employees, everything became to change. In the past, Jack would get up early on time and have a enough rest. However, he started to stay up late, could not get enough sleep and even failed to finish his work on time since he would not be alarmed by his clock and there was not suggestion and recommendation any more. This reply from our part-and-parcel of our daily may lead those who have been told for so long by so many, who are cynical, doubtful and fearful, to put their hands on the arc of the trust and acclaimation acclamation to bend it toward the environment and conditions created by the company.

Admittedly, it is necessary for us to cut short the relentless pace toward the assertion until the opposition has been taken into consideration. Human nature being what it is, the convenience and the comforts the home brings us about will enjoy more favor and preference. There is no better illustration than this one. Due to the advanced technology in communication, most workers choose to work in home if they can including my friends. And most think it is a good experience and being able to avoid the crowded public transportation is fantastic. But after weighing the advantages and weakness, the striking upshot is that the myopic and shallow benefits are not sufficient enough to support the adverse side.

In sum, although some people remain unconvinced about my view, the reasons and factors--the company will improve your working ability greatly and will lead you live healthier--will at least serve the purpose to propel those opponents to notice the various dimensions of the issue and reconsider the parts they have ignored. And I hope more people will agree on my persuasive argument.

lmylacoste

The reading casts light on the harms caused by Buzzers. The speaker's lecture covers the same topic, yet with the total opposite attitude. Likewise, he utilizes three distinctive reasons to justify his perspective.

First of all, the speaker refutes the idea in the passage that the Buzzers are paid for praising a product and the acclamations are always fake(这里word给了个提示 adjective use（consider revising），求释惑). On the contrary, he asserts that the Buzzers are not hired to tell lies. To be specific, his claim is grounded on the fact that the company will hire those who have used their products and have good evaluation of the products although the Buzzers are paid by money. And it is because the service is good that Buzzers are hired. So the praise is not related to the lies. Apparently the professor's point is incompatible with the reading passage.

In addition, as well-defined as the reading passage is, the professor's statement once again contradicts the reading passage. She contends that the consumers will not be less critical as the reading points out, but, on the opposite, they will ask a lot of detailed questions like the price, the service and the using time. These questions will help customers evaluate the products which is key(这里word给了个提示 adjective use（consider revising），求释惑) to the people. Evidently having taken this reasons into consideration, the speaker has sounded doubt on the reading material.

What's more, the reading pinpoints that the Buzzers may jeopardize the social relationship among people. People will keep catious cautious and be less trustful of others. The speaker challenges the point by arguing that the view is stupid. To verify his demonstration, he claims that companies with bad performance will not be able to recruit the Buzzers, and only those profitable ones who sell good products can make it. Furthermore, the experience that buying the things as other described will definitely enhance the social relationship in the society. Clearly, the credibility starts to shrink after the evidence has been into account.

In sum, the professor carefully discerns the drawback of the reading and takes one more step to reveal that the fallacious argument needs a closer scrutiny.

lizchang1990

With the development of the science and technology, there is perhaps no issue more controversial than this one whether or not working in company is much better than in home. A myriad of responses people may hold on the topic concerning the issue regarding the place for work. Although the individual's taste does differ, the view ruling the roost of my mind is that working in office is the prior choice.

First of all, the top of the list of my mind is that the working place is intrinsically tied with the efficiency. And compared with home, office will provide a harmonious and progressive atmosphere which will enhance the cooperation among workers. From common sense and the experience from our daily lives, most people will finish the assigned job and accomplish the missions(这词用得不错~). To make my demonstration more comprehensive, I would like to refer to the experience of my own from which my point can draw strength. During a summer holiday, I was an employee in a real estate company. At first, the heavy work nearly made me stroke and even my boss did not think I could insist until the term ended. But thanks to the help from my partners and the examples they set for me, I was inspired to work harder and finally I earned myself a precious praise from all the staffs.

In addition, another essential point worth being mentioned is that working in company will help you to set a healthy schedule as one of my friends aptly illustrates. My friend Jack worked in a network firm and he was really qualified for that position. But after a new plan that the most efficient workers will can choose to finish their job in home from his corporation, a(小粗心哦) encouraging policy to inspire the employees, everything became to change(没有TO哦). In the past, Jack would get up early on time and have a (小粗心)enough rest. However, he started to stay up late, could not get enough sleep and even failed to finish his work on time since he would not be alarmed by his clock and there was not suggestion and recommendation any more. This reply from our part-and-parcel of our daily may lead those who have been told for so long by so many, who are cynical, doubtful and fearful, to put their hands on the arc of the trust and acclaimation acclamation to bend it toward the environment and conditions created by the company.

Admittedly, it is necessary for us to cut short the relentless pace toward the assertion until the opposition has been taken into consideration. Human nature being what it is, the convenience and the comforts the home brings us about will enjoy more favor and preference. There is no better illustration than this one. Due to the advanced technology in communication, most workers choose to work in home if they can including(前面加逗号) my friends. And most think it is a good experience and being able to avoid the crowded public transportation is fantastic. But after weighing the advantages and weakness, the striking upshot is that the myopic and shallow benefits are not sufficient enough to support the adverse side.

In sum, although some people remain unconvinced about my view, the reasons and factors--the company will improve your working ability greatly and will lead you live healthier--will at least serve the purpose to propel those opponents to notice the various dimensions of the issue and reconsider the parts they have ignored. And I hope more people will agree on my persuasive argument.
每次看你写作文,总觉得你要冲满分的闯劲,字数为王,你是赢了~~~
下次我也自己总结个模板,不然感觉我每次都会超10分钟!

语言没有什么问题,这次我挑不出啥问题, Excellent ~ 看多了,我都知道你下一段讲啥哟!!!

不好意思现在发给你哦~~~

lizchang1990

不好意思哈~刚帮别人再看了一遍,我不知道我改你综合的! ⊙﹏⊙b汗

The reading casts light on the harms caused by Buzzers. The speaker's lecture covers the same topic, yet with the total opposite attitude. Likewise, he utilizes three distinctive reasons to justify his perspective.

First of all, the speaker refutes the idea in the passage that the Buzzers are paid for praising a product and the acclamations are always fake(其实这个fake感觉假的是另外一种,你可以用unreliable么)(这里word给了个提示 adjective use（consider revising），求释惑). On the contrary, he asserts that the Buzzers are not hired to tell lies. To be specific, his claim is grounded on the fact that the company will hire those who have used their products and have good evaluation of the products although the Buzzers are paid by money. And it is because the service is good that Buzzers are hired. So the praise is not related to the lies. Apparently the professor's point is incompatible with the reading passage.(看到你这个模板,我就开心地笑了,因为我刚刚看的是crystall的,你俩一样的模板…纯属我失误,今晚看了2份综合了)

In addition, as well-defined as the reading passage is, the professor's statement once again contradicts the reading passage. She contends that the consumers will not be less critical as the reading points out, but, on the opposite, they will ask a lot of detailed questions like the price, the service and the using time. These questions will help customers evaluate the products which is key(这里word给了个提示 adjective use（consider revising），求释惑) to the people.(我到没觉得这个地方有很大问题,也许word机器也会出现问题呀,我建议换另外一个形容词,keyword默认成名词也不一定,我试了下,换个adj是OK的) Evidently having taken this reasons into consideration, the speaker has sounded doubt on the reading material.

What's more, the reading pinpoints that the Buzzers may jeopardize (词汇不错)the social relationship among people. People will keep catious cautious and be less trustful of others. The speaker challenges the point by arguing that the view is stupid. To verify his demonstration, he claims that companies with bad performance will not be able to recruit the Buzzers, and only those profitable ones who sell good products can make it. Furthermore, the experience that buying the things as other described will definitely enhance the social relationship in the society. Clearly, the credibility starts to shrink after the evidence has been into account.

In sum, the professor carefully discerns the drawback of the reading and takes one more step to reveal that the fallacious argument needs a closer scrutiny.
(我当初也想着用这个结尾来着,看你们都用,我自己明天编个吧~)

总体评价good, O(∩_∩)O~

lmylacoste

There is perhaps no issue more controversial than this one: whether or not people are more informed now than in the past. A myriad of responses people may hold on the topic concerning the issue regarding what the influence the development of science and technology have on education. Although the individual's taste does differ, the viewpoint ruling the roost in my mind is that people are more likely to be educated than those in the past.

First of all, the top of the list of my mind is that there are increasingly sources of systematic information and knowledge compared with the past. From common sense and the experience of our daily lives, we can receive the knowledge in class, surf the internet getinggetting domestic and international news on advanced digital devices via free wifi and read the various and interesting books in the library. To make my demonstration more comprehensively, I would like to refer to the story of my father from which my point can draw strength. My father lived in a village near Shanghai when he was a child and at that time although he desired knowledge, he had no access to what he wanted. But now, he spends most of his time absorbing and digesting information as much as possible and has become a man with rich knowledge. It is the present conditions that meet the desire for being educated of my father.

Besides, another essential point worth being mentioned is that the convenient and comfortable environment provides us a good chance to enjoy the education, as my own experience aptly illustrates. I prefer reading classics literitureliteratiure like the old man and the sea with a cup of rich coffee, basking the sunshine in my clean and neat study. The environment also brings in comforts and the spiritual harmony when I am reading books. Not only does this case verify my point, another point coming from the daily life can also give my point a hand. Now more and more classrooms are equipped with air-conditioners which may maintain the indoor temperature within comfortable range. In this way, students will not be disturbed by fierce climate change and will pay more attention to learning. These replies from the part-and-parcel of our daily lives may lead those people who have been told for so long by so many, who are doubtful and cynical, to put their hands on the arc of the trust to bend it toward the present.

In addition, there are more people participating in the education than before too. And the companies are a beneficial factor to stimulate people to learn, partly caused by the peer pressure. For example, I didn't study hard at first, but one day I was so surprised that most of my friends came with higher scores than I did, which frustrated me a lot. After that, I embarked on hardworking and tried to emulate them, and finally I caught up with my friends. Thanks to the partners, I am encouraged to learn more and better.

Admittedly, it is necessary to cut short the relentless paces to the conclusion before the opposition has been taken into consideration. Nature being what it is, people may be negatively influenced by more and more distractions like online games or TV series. But nothing else could be extrapolate further from this kind of things since it comes away with a pernamentpermanent attraction so that people will soon get bored and return back to study. So occasional and negligible these cases are that they cannot constitute a sufficient support for the adverse side. After weighing pro and con, the striking upshot is obvious that it is easier for people receive education.
In sum, although someone will still remain unconvinced with reference to my demonstration, the factors and reasons about more educational sources, more suitable environment for studying and more people studying around you will at least serve the purpose to propel the opponents to notice the various dimensions about the issue. Hence, with so many boost in status quo, is there any reason to deny the more advanced education than that in the past?

Crystal的秋天

With the development of the science and technology, there is perhaps no issue more controversial than this one whether or not working in company is much better than in 用at 顺一点 home. A myriad of responses people may hold on the topic concerning the issue regarding the place for work. Although the individual's taste（ individuals' tastes do differ） does differ, the view ruling the roost of my mind is that working in office is the prior choice.

First of all, the top of the list （语意有点重复） of my mind is that the working place is intrinsically tied with the efficiency. And compared with home, office will provide a harmonious and progressive atmosphere which will enhance the cooperation among workers. From common sense and the experience from our daily lives, most people will finish the assigned job and accomplish the missions. To make my demonstration more comprehensive, I would like to refer to the experience of my own from which my point can draw strength. During a summer holiday, I was an employee in a real estate company. At first, the heavy work nearly made me stroke and even my boss did not think I could insist until the term ended. But thanks to the help from my partners and the examples they set for me, I was inspired to work harder and finally I earned myself a precious praise from all the staffs. 你这段的中心句是提高效率，但是到了第二句就变成了和谐的氛围，你举得例子其实是表达氛围给你带来的成功，好像跟efficency 没有关系

In addition, another essential point worth being mentioned is that working in company will help you to set a healthy schedule as one of my friends aptly illustrates. My friend Jack worked in a network firm and he was really qualified for that position. But after a new plan that the most efficient workers will can choose to finish their job in home from his corporation, a encouraging policy to inspire the employees, everything became to change. In the past, Jack would get up early on time and have a enough rest. However, he started to stay up late, could not get enough sleep and even failed to finish his work on time since he would not be alarmed by his clock and there was not suggestion and recommendation any more. This reply from our part-and-parcel of our daily may lead those who have been told for so long by so many, who are cynical, doubtful and fearful, to put their hands on the arc of the trust and acclaimation acclamation to bend it toward the environment and conditions created by the company.

Admittedly, it is necessary for us to cut short the relentless pace toward the assertion until the opposition has been taken into consideration. Human nature being what it is, the convenience and the comforts the home brings us about will enjoy more favor and preference. There is no better illustration than this one. Due to the advanced technology in communication, most workers choose to work in home if they can including my friends. 这个条件状语没看懂什么意思 And most think it is a good experience and being able to avoid the crowded public transportation is fantastic. But after weighing the advantages and weakness, the striking upshot is that the myopic and shallow benefits are not sufficient enough to support the adverse side.

In sum, although some people remain unconvinced about my view, the reasons and factors--the company will improve your working ability greatly and will lead you live healthier--will at least serve the purpose to propel those opponents to notice the various dimensions of the issue and reconsider the parts they have ignored. And I hope more people will agree on my persuasive argument. 总结段 perfect

观点很好，论证除了有点小问题，很到位，语言很强悍~ excellent

Crystal的秋天

There is perhaps no issue more controversial than this one: whether or not people are more informed now than in the past. A myriad of responses people may hold on the topic concerning the issue regarding what the influence the development of science and technology have on education. Although the individual's taste does （老问题，建议改一下） differ, the viewpoint ruling the roost in my mind is that people are more likely to be educated than those in the past.

First of all, the top of the list of my mind（自创的模版啊，个人认为有重复的意思） is that there are increasingly sources of systematic information and knowledge compared with the past. From common sense and the experience of our daily lives, we can receive the knowledge in class, surf the internet getting domestic and international news on advanced digital devices via free wifi and read the various and interesting books in the library. To make my demonstration more comprehensively, I would like to refer to the story of my father from which my point can draw strength. My father lived in a village near Shanghai when he was a child and at that time although he desired knowledge, he had no access to what he wanted to learn. But now, he spends most of his time absorbing and digesting information as much as possible and has become a man with rich knowledge. It is the present conditions that meet the desire for being educated of my father.

Besides, another essential point worth being mentioned is that the convenient and comfortable environment provides us a good chance to enjoy the education, as my own experience aptly illustrates. I prefer reading classics literatiure like the old man and the sea with a cup of rich coffee, basking the sunshine in my clean and neat study. The environment also brings in comforts and the spiritual harmony when I am reading books. Not only does this case verify my point, another point coming from the daily life can also give my point a hand. Now more and more classrooms are equipped with air-conditioners which may maintain the indoor temperature within comfortable range. In this way, students will not be disturbed by fierce climate changes and will pay more attention to learning. These replies from the part-and-parcel of our daily lives may lead those people who have been told for so long by so many, who are doubtful and cynical, to put their hands on the arc of the trust to bend it toward the present.

In addition, there are more people participating in the education than before too. And the companies are a beneficial factor to stimulate people to learn, partly caused by the peer pressure. For example, I didn't study hard at first, but one day I was so surprised that most of my friends came with higher scores than I did, which frustrated me a lot. After that, I embarked on hardworking and tried to emulate them, and finally I caught up with my friends. Thanks to the partners, I am encouraged to learn more and better.

Admittedly, it is necessary to cut short the relentless paces to the conclusion before the opposition has been taken into consideration. Nature being what it is, people may be negatively influenced by more and more distractions like online games or TV series. But nothing else could be extrapolate further from this kind of things since it comes away with a permanent attraction so that people will soon get bored and return back to study. So occasional and negligible these cases are that they cannot constitute a sufficient support for the adverse side. After weighing pro and con, the striking upshot is obvious that it is easier for people receive education.
In sum, although someone will still remain unconvinced with reference to my demonstration, the factors and reasons about more educational sources, more suitable environment for studying and more people studying around you will at least serve the purpose to propel the opponents to notice the various dimensions about the issue. Hence, with so many boost in status quo, is there any reason to deny the more advanced education than that in the past?




大牛作文，我不知道怎么改了，见谅！还要多学像你学习