DB的作文贴

搞G战士DB

9.5 独立 In order to solve the problems of the present and the future, people should review the past

Every country, every nation, even every single people has its own past, present and future. Events that are happening today stem from the past and will have direct effect on the future. The time-line is unbreakable. History provides valuable sources for understanding different people and societies nowadays, predicting future trends and building a person’s identity. Therefore no one should live only for today separated from the past.

History generates past experience and formulates the steps of development. By reviewing the past, you can learn from the fault made by people before and figure out why they did it wrong and how to fix it. Then use the experience you learned from it to solve the problems you have now or in the future. What is more significant is to learn from the fault that was done by yourself. That is how we get improved. For example, Addison, the father of bulb, has failed thousands of time before he got success. After every experiment he failed, he spent plenty of time figuring why he was wrong and thus could get improved next time. Every little step of improvement made him success at the last experiment. In this case history is the best teacher. It works to everyone.

Except learning the way to fix the fault, reviewing the past can also assist us to avoid previous mistakes and thus make the problems of the present and the future easier to solve. We have made of history step-by-step and day-by-day. The problem we have now or might have in the future is connected to what we have done in the past. If we had did all the steps right, we would not have problems now. And if we finish the work in a right way, we won’t have problems in the future either. For instance, when I began preparing the TOEFL, the first thing I did is to searching the experience that was written down by those who had finished TOEFL with a fantastic grade on the internet. Learning the mistakes they have made helped me avoid make these again during my preparation.

In conclusion, I strongly believe that it is of benefit for us to solve the problems of the past and the future by reviewing the past. So let us look back a little bit and learn more about the history and ourselves.

duniaguodupa

Every country, every nation, even every single people has its own past, present and future. Events that are happening today stem from the past and will have direct effect on the future. The time-line is unbreakable. History provides valuable sources for understanding different people and societies nowadays, predicting future trends and building a person’s identity. Therefore no one should live only for today separated from the past.

History generates past experience (历史产生过去的经验，个人觉得用好的经验比较好)  and formulates the steps of development. By reviewing the past, you can learn from the fault made by people before and figure out why they did it wrong and how to fix it. Then use the experience you learned from it to solve the problems you have now or in the future. (此句似乎有点问题，缺主语了？) What is more significant is to learn from the fault that was done by yourself. That is how we get improved. For example, Addison, the father of bulb, has failed thousands of time before he got success. After every experiment he failed, he spent plenty of time figuring why he was wrong and thus could get improved next time. Every little step of improvement made him success（succeed?好一点？） at the last experiment. In this case，history is the best teacher. It works to everyone.

Except learning the way to fix the fault, reviewing the past can also assist us to avoid previous mistakes and thus make the problems of the present and the future easier to solve. We have made of history step-by-step and day-by-day. The problem we have now or might have in the future is connected to what we have done in the past. If we had did all the steps right, we would not have problems now. And if we finish the work in a right way, we won’t have problems in the future either. （这两句似乎有点累赘）For instance, when I began preparing the TOEFL, the first thing I did is to searching(search) the experience that was written down by those who had finished TOEFL with a fantastic grade on the internet. Learning the mistakes they have made helped me avoid make (making) these again during my preparation.

In conclusion, I strongly believe that it is of benefit for us to solve the problems of the past (粗心了) and the future by reviewing the past. So let us look back a little bit and learn more about the history and ourselves.


小弟第一次改作文，请多多包涵·~

总的来说，全文没什么错误，思路也很清晰，而且还有例子证明哦！很不错
不过感觉第一段可以再清晰分明一点，还有句型和词汇可以再做一些升级。加油~

搞G战士DB

9.6独立 抱歉交晚了一点，感觉还没昨天的写得好，求狠拍！
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? The most important problems in today's world will be solved in our lifetime.

We live in a world with unlimited problems and personally I do not agree that any of important problems in today’s world will be solved in our lifetime. I believe that selfish and greedy are human nature. The fact is that we always put our own benefits and comforts in the first place when having different opinions in solving worldwide problems.

Climate change is one the most important problems in today’s world. With the development of economy and extremely high speed of population increasing, human are using more and more gas and carbon, which cause carbon dioxide emission reaching to a very high lever. JingDong protocol has been published in late 20th century, which aims to limit the carbon dioxide emission. Nevertheless, America, which is the country with the biggest carbon dioxide emission in the world, refuses to sign this protocol, making this protocol far less meaningful than we expected. Obviously, politicians only focus on how to attract citizen to vote to them, they will never do things that might influence the development of economy like signing JingDong protocol. If we cannot put aside our differences when we try to solve the worldwide problems, they will never be solved.

Food shortage and wasting is another important problem in today’s world. The development of society and economy is extraordinary imbalance. There are millions of children starving in Africa while tons of food is wasted in developed countries. You must have thought that it is very easy to solve this problem, since we only need to transfer those redundant foods from developed countries to those poor countries in Africa, right? The fact is that, everything becomes complicated when it is relevant to politics and national interest. For instance, President Obama signed a bill to provide food and resources to those poor countries in Africa. However, this bill has to be voted through House of Representatives and senate, which gives his political opponent a chance to refuse this bill. They can be selfish and inhumanity, they do not even care how many children might die because this bill was not voted through so long as they can achieve their own political goal.

In summary, human mostly only care about their own benefits now. We spent too much meaningless time and resources on discussing instead of acting. Thus I strongly believe that the important problems in today’s world won‘t be solved in our lifetime.

E月羽

We live in a world with unlimited(感觉这个词一般用来指边界无限，而不只数量无限，可考虑换用countless) problems and personally I do not agree that any of important problems in today’s world will be solved in our lifetime. I believe that selfish and greedy are human nature. （可改为状语从句会比较好which lead ）The fact is that we always put our own benefits and comforts in the first place(at top priority) when having different opinions in solving worldwide problems.

Climate change is one the most important problems in today’s world. With the development of economy and extremely high speed of population increasing, human are using（carbon不能using） more and more gas and carbon, which cause carbon dioxide emission reaching to a very high lever. JingDong protocol has been published in late 20th century, which aims to limit the carbon dioxide emission. Nevertheless, America, which is the country with the biggest carbon dioxide emission in the world, refuses to sign this protocol, making this protocol far less meaningful than we expected. Obviously, politicians only focus on how to attract citizen to vote to them, they will never do things that might influence（promote可能比较好） the development of economy like signing JingDong protocol. If we cannot put aside our differences（应该是difficults吧？） when we try to solve the worldwide problems, they will never be solved.
Food shortage and wasting is another important problem in today’s world. The development of society and economy（感觉这两个比较怪怪的） is extraordinary imbalance. There are millions of children starving in Africa while tons of food is wasted in developed countries. You must have thought that it is very easy to solve this problem, since we only need to transfer those redundant foods from developed countries to those poor countries in Africa, right? The fact is that, everything becomes complicated when it is relevant to politics and national interest. For instance, President Obama signed a bill to provide food and resources to those poor countries in Africa. However, this bill has to be voted through House of Representatives and senate, which gives his political opponent a chance to refuse this bill. They can be selfish and inhumanity, they do not even care how many children might die because this bill was not voted through so long as they can achieve their own political goal. （可以总结一下）
（可适当增加一个让步段）
In summary, human mostly only care about their own benefits now. We spent too much meaningless time and resources on discussing instead of acting. Thus I strongly believe that the important problems in today’s world won‘t be solved in our lifetime.
文章语法错误少，写的不错，只需注意一下个别用词。Ps：水平有限，共勉之。

xeyyxzty

DB呀~今天的作文我明天下午/晚上传~
有点晚，别介意哈~

搞G战士DB

DB呀~今天的作文我明天下午/晚上传~
有点晚，别介意哈~

-- by 会员 xeyyxzty (2012/9/7 22:42:35)

怎么会介意刚好我要出门，那晚上来给你看哈~

搞G战士DB

急着出门去参加CD的分享会，来不及自改了，肯定会有很多错误。第一次尝试三论点，写的比较啰嗦，麻烦熊熊了哈~狠狠拍吧！！！
9.7独立Some people think university professors should spend more time doing research while others think they should spend more time educating students. What is your view?

With the development of our society, university is not a fresh word to people nowadays anymore. Nevertheless, professors in universities have different preferences. Some of them spend more time doing research while others prefer to spend time on educating students. I do believe that it is significant to do research, but after a careful thought, I think professors should focus on educating students. After all, university is school and professors are teachers, it is their duty to impart students knowledge and they can also learn from their students to help finish their research. Meanwhile, having class is also an opportunity for professors to review the basic knowledge.

Educating is a process that human inheriting knowledge and learning skills to explore the world. It is how human getting prepared for their future life and school is such a place that providing education. Although the technology has developed so fast that human nowadays can study from resources in the internet, studying from the professors is still the most efficient way. University professors are most knowledgeable people in the world, and it is their duty to impart their knowledge to students. However, many professors choose to spend more time on doing their own research instead of educating students. In some countries, especially in China, teacher is not a well-paid career, so professors choose to do research, through which they can earn extra salary to satisfy their physical needs. However, professors should notice that they have chose a career that can satisfy some more elevated needs that beyond money. On this point, they should be responsible for their choice and focus on educating students.

In addition to it is professors’ duty to focus on educating students, teaching is also a process that not only students learn from their teachers but also teachers learn from students. Actually, there is research reveals that most of important discoveries were found in their first ten years after scholars started their researches. It seems like it is difficult for scholars remain creative during a long period. However, students, who are in their most creative age, have countless brilliant and excellent ideas that professors can get inspiration from. So teaching can sometimes help professors to do their research more efficiently.

Meanwhile, having classes is also an opportunity for professors to review their basic knowledge. For instance, my father is a university professor, he got into a dilemma when written his PHD paper. It was very tough for him, but one day one of his students asked him a question in task book, and my father found his answer to get out from his trouble in his paper from the book. Sometimes it is easy for us to ignore the most basic knowledge when we keep on our study deeper and deeper, and basic knowledge is always the most essential and significant knowledge. Thus educating students is also opportunity for professors to think about questions from the top and can help them get out of troubles in their researches.

In summary, basic on the reasons I listed above, I strongly believe that professors should spend more time on educating students instead of doing research.

晨依Jacqueline

9-7
DB的观点和单词都写得很精彩。受教了
个人建议--
1 开头缩短一点点（关于你为什么选择这样一个观点可以不详细说，放到下面的内容里面去），
结尾加长一点点（一句话重申观点说服力不足够哦，可以加一句好处啊什么的convince一下）。
2 写长句子的时候注意句式（瞻前顾后，千万不要句式杂糅什么的），还有语法小错误。
Educating is a process that human inheriting knowledge and learning skills to explore the world.
Educating is a process that of human inheriting knowledge and learning skills to explore the world.
It is how human getting prepared for their future life and school is such a place that providing education. 这个病句自己改改。
等时间多了仔细再看看哈

晨依Jacqueline

急着出门去参加CD的分享会，来不及自改了，肯定会有很多错误。

求分享啊~

xeyyxzty

With thedevelopment of our society, university is not a fresh word to people nowadaysanymore. Nevertheless,(转折前后我感受不到联系哦~给我解释一下吧) professors inuniversities have different preferences. Some of them spend more time doingresearch while others prefer to spend time on educating students. I do believethat it is significant to do research, but after a careful thought, I thinkprofessors should focus on educating students. After all, university is schooland professors are teachers, and(貌似缺少连词吧) it istheir duty to impart （从来没见过~厉害）studentsknowledge and they can also learn from their students to help finish theirresearch. Meanwhile, having class is also an opportunity for professors toreview the basic knowledge.

Educating is a process that （后面应该加句子吧~）humaninheriting knowledge and learning skills to explore the world. It is how human getting prepared for theirfuture life （怎么感觉这句话没有说完似的~it is指什么呀？）and school is such a place that （+句子） providing education. Although the technology has developed so fastthat human nowadays can study from resources in （on?）theinternet, studying from the professors is still the most efficient way.University professors are most knowledgeable people in the world, and it istheir duty to impart their knowledge to students. However, many professorschoose to spend more time on doing their own research instead of educatingstudents. In some countries, especially in China, teacher is not a well-paid career (job), soprofessors choose to do research, through which they can earn extra salary to satisfytheir physical needs. However, professors should notice that they have chosen acareer that can satisfy some more elevated needs that beyond money. On thispoint, they should be responsible for their choice and focus on educatingstudents.

In addition to it is professors’ duty to focus oneducating students, and teaching is also a process that not onlystudents learn from their teachers but alsoteachers learn from students (and vice versa怎么样).Actually, there is a research reveals that most of importantdiscoveries were found in their(professors,没有指明) first ten years after （When）scholars started their researches. It seemslike it is difficult for scholars to (有没有必要我也不清楚~)remaincreative during a long period. However, students, who are in their mostcreative age, have countless brilliant and excellent ideas that professors canget inspiration from. So teaching can sometimes help professors to do theirresearch more efficiently.

Meanwhile, having classes is also an opportunityfor professors to review their basic knowledge. For instance, my father is auniversity professor, and he got into a dilemma when written(writing) his PHD paper. It was very tough for him, but one day oneof his students asked him a question in task book (这是什么书？), and myfather found his answer to get out from (of)his trouble in his (the) paperfrom the book. Sometimes it iseasy (直接说it is common) for us to ignore the most basic knowledge whenwe keep on our study deeper and deeper, and basicknowledge is always the most essential and （and出现的有点多哈）significant knowledge. Thus educating students is also an opportunityfor professors to think about questions from the top and can help them get outof troubles in their researches.

In summary, basic (based) onthe reasons I listed above, I strongly believe that professors should spendmore time on educating students instead of doing research.
觉得你从句里总是缺少动词哈~这个很有问题
由于我和你的观点不同哈~所以我不太好评价你的论点~咱们两个的对比太鲜明......
很多句子有点罗嗦~虽然看着很长很棒，但是让人有点困惑~能看懂，但是不是很舒服~个人小感受，DB参考就可以
有的地方代词指代不是很明确~
就这些吧，熊熊的作文很不好只能看出这么多~多交流