让我们一起尝试变得有深度吧！！Issue 求指点求意见！

周花生

5. Claim: Governments must ensure that their major cities receive the financial support they need in order to thrive.

Reason: It is primarily in cities that a nation's cultural traditions are preserved and generated.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim and the reason on which that claim is based.

5. Claim: Governments must ensure that their major cities receive the financial support they need in order to thrive.

Reason: It is primarily in cities that a nation's cultural traditions are preserved and generated.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim and the reason on which that claim is based.

提纲。1. 国家的主要城市可以反映保存一部分的文化。巴黎，时尚艺术浪漫之都。
          2. 但不是值得政府财政支持的主要原因。 主要原因是，可以吸引人群，投资，扩大市场，赢得国际知名度等等。 北京伦敦奥运会。上海国际赛车场。
已经修改错别字，which are countless。。。囧


Today, almost every government is struggling to survive and thrive and how to attribute their limited capitals is always a thorny problem, no matter who they are - the super power USA or a tiny African country we have never heard of. The claim that governments must ensure that in order to thrive, their major cities deserve the financial support they need is acceptable to me, however, the main reason is definitely not, as it stated, that in major cities, a nation's culture traditions are preserved and generated.



We must admit that some major cities are able to represent a nation's culture to a certain degree,.When it comes to Paris, what is the first object or image flashes in your mind? I think, for most people, they are likely to picture a scene where two lovebirds were kissing next to Seine river or an elegant woman in Chanel or a nameless artist drawing in a mundane streets. Indeed, Paris is the pumping heart, which represents romance, fashion and art, of the world and she definitely deserves any financial support from the government as a undeniable fact that she also attracts numerous tourists and investigation from all over the world, and thus brings about a tremendous fortune for the government.



However, a nation's culture usually was not born and cannot be preserved very well in major cities. Let us talk about France again, a documentary from Discovery once shot a episode about french food history, in which they mentioned a famous wine that you can only find in a small town in south of France as only the nature material and original method can produce such unbelievable wine, which you cannot have in any restaurant. Moreover, today's major cities are metropolis, where natural materials are very scarce and people, a group of working machine chasing efficiency, are lack of patience and technique to produce such kind of food, which is also a part of French culture. But, whom can you blame for that? Modern city's living pace and other characteristics determines that it is impossible to maintain some traditions in it.



Additionally, from my perspective, the main reason why major cities deserve financial supports they need from the government is that they not only represent the image of a country, but also benefit its government significantly. Think about Beijing and London, after they held the Olimpics they successfully draw the world's attention, rending an exponentially increasing tourism, numerous promising investigations and most importantly, international fame. In fact, sometimes these intangible assets worth more. Another successful example is that Shanghai International Circuit, which host Formula One, a sort of car racing game, has been losing over millions of dollars since the beginning, however, the Shanghai government is still supportive. Though at the first sight, it seems to be an unwise investigation, but if you step back and look at the big picture, you will find that international fame and attention could bring Shanghai, a prospering city, high revenue, making every financial support worth.



In sum, while considering financial support, every government wants to preserve their precious culture, nevertheless, the reason that in major cities where a nation's cultural traditions are preserved and generated is not strong enough after a scrupulous examination above.

普渡哥

我觉得题目中说的是大城市thrive而不是政府thrive吧。

竹林中人

We must admit that some major cities are able to represent a nation's culture to a certain degree,.When it comes to Paris, 分论点后面不宜直接跟例子，显得不够analytical吧，最好能跟一句对这句进行一个强调或者解释，显得很严谨

竹林中人

后面的两段同样，例子是有用，但不是这么用，重要的还是分析吧还有就是这个建议的可行性你有必要谈一谈，另外就是是不是只能由政府资助，这是对政策或者建议类Issue应该考虑到的几个点

周花生

i谢谢你们的建议！！ 是的 我觉得elaboration部分还不够，例子篇幅过多，有点堆砌例子的感觉，研究范文还不够透彻！！确实只谈到政府有限制，应该可以谈谈经济发展，人们的生活，就业物价啊什么什么的。。

周花生

不过每次三十分钟都想不到那么多内容  只能用example充字数了    头疼那。。。

竹林中人

如果不急于考试，先养成好的思维习惯比较好，再掐时间

limpid41

好像。。分析不太够。。就一句带过，然后开始剧例子。变成整段都是例子， 却没有什么分析的成分在里面。。

我也有这个问题啊。。。楼主你什么时候考？

周花生

我818    头疼头疼！！！！

limpid41

那没几天了。。我9.1
楼主加油啊！等你喜讯啊。。你在哪里考？