[讨论]刚刚写了一篇AB题型应付这个月的考试，请大家提点意见，，谢谢

yorkxiang

刚刚写了一篇AB题型应付这个月的考试，请大家提点意见，，谢谢

9 Some people prefer to live in a small town, Others prefer to live in a big city. Which place would you prefer to live in? Use specific reasons and details to support your answer.

Depending on my personal experience, personality tape, and emotional concern. We find some people hold the idea of living in a small town; meanwhile, others prefer to living in a big city. From my point of view, it is more advisable to choose living in a small town rather than living in a big city. My arguments for this point are listed below.

There are numerous reasons why I choose living in a small town and I would in here explain a few of the most important ones. The main reason is that you can own nice neighbors and communities. They can be given a concrete example: people who living in a small town, like communicate with neighbors for recreation. Neighbors may invite you to their houses to chating and drinking. In addition, they also like to help you if you need. But this condition is unimaginable in city life. As a result, living in small town has warmer communities and neighborhoods.

Another reason why I advocate the attitude of living in a small town is that relaxing. Take the case of a thing that you can relax and enjoy your life because you do not need pay too much attention for the competition. Some people claim that is not good for youngsters because it makes youngsters lost the enterprising. However, I consider that the life is too short and life is not only for work. So we should enjoy our life.

One very strong argument of living in a small town is that you can have a better family condition. This demonstrates the undeniable fact that people who living in a small town get more time with their family and share the happiness with children. Family is as important as work in modern world.

Of course, living in a big city also has advantages in some extent, such as more opportunity and convenience.

But if all these factors are contemplated, the advantages of living in a small town carry more weight than those of living in a big city. From what has been discussed above, we may finally draw conclusion that living in a small town is better choice.

再次谢谢

pengstone

以下是引用yorkxiang在2004-10-11 16:55:00的发言：

刚刚写了一篇AB题型应付这个月的考试，请大家提点意见，，谢谢

9 Some people prefer to live in a small town, Others prefer to live in a big city. Which place would you prefer to live in? Use specific reasons and details to support your answer.

Depending on my personal experience, personality tape, and emotional concern. We find some people hold the idea of living in a small town 注意加粗的部分,感觉有点接不上啊?; meanwhile, others prefer to living in a big city. From my point of view, it is more advisable to choose living in a small town rather than living in a big city. My arguments for this point are listed below.

There are numerous reasons why I choose living in a small town and I would in here explain a few of the most important ones. The main reason is that you can own nice neighbors and communities. They 指代什么呢?can be given a concrete example: people who living in a small town, like communicate ??with neighbors for recreation. Neighbors may invite you to their houses to chating and drinking.应该用动词原形吧 In addition, they also like to help you if you need. But this condition is unimaginable in city life. 有点绝对些了As a result, living in small town has warmer communities and neighborhoods.

Another reason why I advocate the attitude of living in a small town is that relaxing. Take the case of a thing 不大明白that you can relax and enjoy your life because you do not need pay too much attention for 一般是pay attention to the competition. Some people claim that is not good for youngsters because it makes youngsters lost the enterprising.词性对吗? However, I consider that the life is too short and life is not only for work. So we should enjoy our life.

One (another)very strong argument of living in a small town is that you can have a better family condition. This demonstrates the undeniable fact that people who living in a small town get more time with their family and share the happiness with children. Family is as important as work in modern world.

Of course, living in a big city also has advantages in some extent, such as more opportunity and convenience.

But if all these factors are contemplated, the advantages of living in a small town carry more weight than those of living in a big city. From what has been discussed above, we may finally draw conclusion that living in a small town is better choice.

再次谢谢

    楼主的用词还可以,但还不够准确. 另外, 句子与句子间的逻辑连接还要加强

加油哦!!

guandream

"Depending on my personal experience, personality tape, and emotional concern. We find some people hold the idea of living in a small town; meanwhile, others prefer to living in a big city. From my point of view, it is more advisable to choose living in a small town rather than living in a big city. My arguments for this point are listed below. "

the conclusion is good, but the introduction is also important in the essay.

good luck to your exam

yorkxiang

谢谢，但是不知道这样的文章能拿多少分，因为我快要考了，所以都是照ETS的时间写的，，，

请pengstone帮我评估一下大概可以得几分？

pengstone

呵呵，这个问题很难答的

再努力，减少语法硬伤，保证结构完整和字数，上5分还是有望的。在正式考试中，尽量用自己有把把握的词和句子，哪怕是简单些，也比出错好。