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给以一个6分作文参考，是写作区的，很有启发。
08.10.22爱丁堡作文6分AI,AA原文与1日速成技巧, 回报CD 不才考的不好, 就作文还拿得出手些, 下面的作文是我考场的原文
为了让大家真实体会6分啥样, 我连敲错的敲漏的字母都没有改. 直接端上来. 攒下人品. 复习建议 1.战线不能长, 少做无用功/重复活. 文章一定要长. 打字要快, 要学会COPY& ASTE. 2. 别用大词, 外国人分不出我们的大词小词, 越唠叨越好, 简单别出错比复杂出错强, 我一个大词没用, 全高中词汇 3.除非你很有耐心和抗压性, 模板在短短30分钟能是不可能完美的一字不差的背出来的, 所以模版是辅助作用, 还是要自己理清楚逻辑 4.本人复习方法: 看1遍本月作文题目, 大概没不认识的字, 考前一晚写个自己的模板, 第二天早上再看两遍. OK, 上阵.
Analysis of an Argument Read the argument and the instructions that follow it, and then make any notes that will help you plan your response. Begin typing your response in the box at the bottom of the screen. The following appeared in the letters-to-the-editor section of a local newspaper. “Muscle Monthly, a fitness magazine that regularly features pictures of bodybuilders using state-of-the-art exercise machines, frequently sells out, according to the owner of Skyview Newsstand. To help maximize fitness levels in our town's residents, we should, therefore, equip our new community fitness center with such machines.” 河西备注：下面1，2，3，4 这4个罪是我分析的，但这篇作者又的并没写到，一样6分。每段下面是我的评注。 1，他因：健身模特照片上是在用这个健身器材，不一定模特们平常就是用这个器材，锻炼出自己的好身材的。模特很可能只是代言的广告模特，收了厂家广告酬劳，示范而已。他们的身材也许早就是那样，说不定是其他品牌的器材锻炼出来的呢。 2，错误假设：买了器材，这个镇的居民就会去镇的锻炼吗？也许买来了器材，大家都不去呢？钱也浪费了。。。 3，杂志卖的好是其他原因：内容，促销啊。。。 4，调查样本：一个报摊说没有代表性。 Discuss how well reasoned you find this argument. In your discussion be sure to analyze the line of reasoning and the use of evidence in the argument. For example, you may need to consider what questionable assumptions underlie the thinking and what alternative explanations or counterexamples might weaken the conclusion. You can also discuss what sort of evidence would strengthen or refute the argument, what changes in the argument would make it more logically sound, and what, if anything, would help you better evaluate its conclusion. 526 字 In this argument the author reached a conclusion that in order to help maximize fitness levels in our town's residents, we should equip our new community fitness center with the state-of-the art exercise machines which the Musle Monthly fitness magazine features pictures. That is because the state-of-the art exercise machines frequently sells out, according to the owner of Skyview Newsstand. Although at first glance, the argument
appears to be somewhat convincing, it has some significant drawbacks and the author's reasoning is logically flawed. By only not carefully evaluating the author's reasoning and logic but also performing a deep and fundemental case-by-case analysis, we can see the author fails to consider the following factors. 把题目里的话，略微改写，凑字数。Argument的内容，这个Argument得出的原因。点出这个Argument有逻辑问题。 In the first place, the author argues that to help maximize fitness levels in our town's residents, we should equip our new community fitness center with the state-of-the art exercise machines, and these machines should be the ones which the Musle Monthly fitness magazine features. It is correct that according to the owner of Skyview Newsstand, the exercise machines frequently sells out in the other places. However, that is not to say, in our community, the same kind of sales performance can be expected. For example, although people in our community and people in other community all go to gym and use exercise machines, they may not necessarily want to use the same kind of machines. Therefore, we can conclude that the author makes a false analogy. 第1个理由：再次重复该Argument的内容凑字数。让步一下，再转折。小结。 Secondly, the author fails to explain where, when and from whom the the owner of Skyview Newsstand got the information. Did he/she claim that the state-of-the art exercise machines frequently sells out because she/he took a survey by himself? Or he/she just heard that from others? Who took part in the survey? How many people took part in the survey? Did everybody in the survey respond it? These questions are all unanswered. So it is clear to say there is no evidence that the survey is done properly by random sampling. Furthermore,
there is no evidence to suggest that the claim that the owner of Skyview Newsstand which the author's opinion is based on is correct. 第2个理由：点出该Argument的样本错误。列出一堆反问句，凑字数。小结。 Thirdly, the authors assumes that everything will remain unchanged in the future. Admittedly, the state-of-the-art exercise machines are very popular right now, and no matter why they are so popular (probably due to the advertising in the Muscle Monthly), we can not deny the fact this kind of machine frequently sells out. However, that is not to say in the future it will remain popular. There is no guarteen that it will still sell out frequently when the time and space change. 第3个理由：直接点出该Argument的错误：错误假设。让步一下（再次重复一堆内容凑字数），再转折：逻辑问题大大的。 To sum up, the conclusion that we should equip our new community fitness center with the state-of-the art exercise machines which the Musle Monthly fitness magazine features pictures, although has some merits in the light of common sense and experience from daily life, is not convincing because the author's fails to consider the important factors discussed above.
In order to improve his/her argument, the author should correct the false analogy and maybe collect information from a serious ramdomly sampling statistics rather than using the owner of Skyview Newsstand's claim. 结尾：再次重复Argument的内容凑字数，作者犯逻辑错误的原因。指出作者如何改正。 Analysis of an Issue Read the statement and the instructions that follow it, and then make any notes that will help you plan your response. Begin typing your response in the box at the bottom of the screen. “Constant innovation and change within an organization are as likely to damage the organization as they are to improve it.” Discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the opinion stated above. Support your views with reasons and/or examples from your own experience, observations, or reading. 618 字 The statement of the issue claims that constant innovation and change within an organization are likely to demage the organization, just like they are likely to improve it. The seemingly simple and straight-forward issue has a complex nature, therefore there are hardly any certainly answers to it. To some extent, I agree with the author's viewpoint that constant innovation and change within an organization may not always be a good thing for an organization. However, as different people may hold different opinion due to distinctive education levels, family backgrouds, value judgements and life experience, we can not simply conclude that constant innovation and change within an organization are in all cases, like to demage the organization. To discuss this complex issue we need to perform a careful case-by-case analysis as discussed below. Firstly, the issue that constant innovation and change within an organization are likely to demage the organization, just like they are likely to improve it, is correct in some cases.
For example, for a small company, the expense of innovation and change might be too expensive for them to afford, if they kept constant innovation and change that might demage the company's finance and it may fall bankruptcy. Also, the same applied to more traditional companies, like corporate finance side of the investment banks, they earn credits because they provide constant good services to their corporate clients, not because they kept changing the way of financing the debts. The more tradtional ways are preferred in the sectors which orgainizations are expected to perform constant and stable. On the other hand, the issue is only partically correct, due to differenct natures of different organization sectors. Admittedly, the bank's corporate finance and probably also the private banking sector should not always come up with new ideas as the clients want them to be safe and stable. However, other divisions in an investment bank, say Information Technology or Fixed Income products divisions, need a lot of innovation to be successful. For instance, in order to improve the business, one of the largest investment bank, Goldman Sachs, invested a huge amount of money in the research of their Fixed Income, Currency and Derivatives department, and as a result, they earn excessive return in this business. This investment is not wasted, but in the opposite, save the company from the recent subprime crisis. I belive that is a very good example to illustrate that in many cases, still, the innovation and change within an organization are valuable. In addition, we need to take into account the pros and cons of the innovation and change within an organization. Carefully weighing the cost and benefits and find the break-even point of the two are crucial. For example, if the cost of the innovation and change is higher than the benefit of it, we should not put money into the innovation and change within an organization. In the opposite, if the cost of the innovation and change is lower than the benefit of it, we should certainly invest in the innovation and change within an organization. To sum up, although the claim that constant innovation and change within an organization are likely to demage the organization as they are to improve it, has some merit due to the fact that smaller companies and traditional companies may not benefit as much in the innovation, is still not convincing in certain cases as I discussed in the third paragraph. To take all these factors into account, we can safely arrive at the conclusion that, the constant innovation and change within an organization is morely likely to benefit largers organization in the emerging markets and high technology markets than the more traditional ones and the smaller ones.
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发表于 2009-4-21 12:18:00
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