12月考T 跪求改作文

豆豆沙

 d

[此贴子已经被作者于2008-10-18 8:01:31编辑过]

豆豆沙

拜托了   帮我改改吧

cowmen911

 Frankly,your composition can be only scored  "3" .The connection is not well,besides,your thinking for the writing is more like chinese-english.please pay more attention.however,wish you could do well in the exam.