新人报到。。写了一片文章。。因为没有了解分队运行方式所以写的不是规定的。。求蹂躏。。

fuzhengrui

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?At universities and colleges, sports and social activities are just as important as classes and libraries and should receive equal financial support.

 Universities and colleges are fantastic places where students pursue further study and develop their interests as well as abilities. Classes and libraries provide the knowledge for study or research while sports and social activities provides other possibilities for students' careers. From my perspective, these two aspects are equally important, thus they should receive equal attention and financial support.

 If a university or college were equipped with advanced research facilities and experienced professors but no playground or court, it wouldn't be considered as a top school.Stanford has been universally acknowledged as the top universities in the world, and it's basketball team is one of the best teams among American universities. This university has done a lot to encourage their students to engage in different sports, and some of their athletes stand out, which in turn gains fame for Stanford.

 The universities, which teach their students different talent and skills and make them outstanding in several fields, can be regarded as good universities. Tim Duncan, a distinguished center in NBA, graduated from Wake Forest University with a psychology degree. He didn't choose to continue his career in psychology but has been playing basketball for Spurs since his graduation. So excellently he shows the dominance as a center on basketball court that most people fail to remember his psychological background. At present, basketball is his whole life. However, several years later when he has to retire, he can choose to be a psychological doctor as his second job.Wake Forest University provided Tim Duncan the opportunity to continue his basketball career, without which he might have not been worldwide known.

 Admittedly, sports and social activities play important roles in universities and colleges, classes and libraries have their own significance. You can imagine what the world would be if all universities and colleges no longer place the emphasis on academic research and libraries. In that case, the whole country would fall. In a word, science and technologies are the main two factors used to evaluate one nation’s power.

To conclude, the government should finance equally in classes and libraries as well as sports and social activities.

fuzhengrui

谢谢楼主详尽的修改。我学到了很多。
本来也想帮楼主互改。可是读了文章之后。感觉用词用句都很到位。而且长短句搭配的特别协调。
除了文章中。Provide的单复数问题，和its写为it's没有任何错误。好多句子我都学习了。比如place emphasis on.
文中的举例也很有国际化视野。

但是我有点小建议：第一楼主文章字数略少。虽然老美185中。大多是300字多点的作文。但是我们考托福毕竟在中国大陆的POOL里。貌似400以上已经成为了一种潜规则。推荐楼主再多写点。这样会更稳。

-- by 会员 pedrohuo (2012/8/31 7:37:40)

谢谢你的意见哈哈啊

pedrohuo

谢谢楼主详尽的修改。我学到了很多。
本来也想帮楼主互改。可是读了文章之后。感觉用词用句都很到位。而且长短句搭配的特别协调。
除了文章中。Provide的单复数问题，和its写为it's没有任何错误。好多句子我都学习了。比如place emphasis on.
文中的举例也很有国际化视野。

但是我有点小建议：第一楼主文章字数略少。虽然老美185中。大多是300字多点的作文。但是我们考托福毕竟在中国大陆的POOL里。貌似400以上已经成为了一种潜规则。推荐楼主再多写点。这样会更稳。