8.3 第一次参加小分队，求砖拍~

sarahpx

8.2 独立写作
  Parents should help children to do their work or encourage children to do their work independently.

In this day and age, parents, the first and the most important person for every kid, are bothered by many dilemmas during child rearing: more beverages or not, more TV time or less, private school or public school? Eventually, they will run into this one: should they help with their kids’ school work or not? If they tend to help out every night, the situation may last as long as their children’s school years go. If they step back, their kids might risk falling behind in class, because all other kids are getting help from their parents. Nevertheless, “everyone else is doing it” is not a good reason for this action. Rather than help their children with school works, parents should encourage kids to solve their problem independently.



Apparently, coping with the works from children, parents consume a great deal of time and energy, which should have been used on job performance and home affairs. In Asian society, there never run short of parents working 12-8 hours at day job, and 4-5 hours as their kids’ tutors. Under the increasing burden, one day the white-collar parents will lose their former high performances; even the most vigorous ones cannot escape from this adversity. Take my colleague Melisa as an example. She suddenly fell behind from the top-5 sales to the failing group after her 7-year-old daughter attended primary school. Making hand work from art class, solving math puzzles, and supervising her girl’s word dictations, all these extra works turned her into careless and rude sales person when meeting clients. She lost her clients’ faith, and also her boss’. This is unfair for a young mother.



Besides, parents are not the good roles when tutoring kids at home. Parents already did their learning procedures when they were in school. In this phrase of their life, their priorities are to earn money and feed family. When taking on the helping role in kids’ school works, they have to relearn everything all over again with elder brains, be better at the works than their kids are, and explain every puzzle in easy-to-learn way. These procedures are really hard for parents. For example, if you have a kid in 3^rd grade, you must make endeavor to find three ways to solve a math question, to create four new colors out of three-primary colors with palettes, and even to collect pictures of more than 5 kinds of butterflies. Parent, who is neither a developmental expert nor a certificated teacher, can easily blur the line between helping and doing it for kids.



Admittedly, if you help out your kids as much as other parents, your children may achieve higher scores when ranking. And if you don’t do that, your children would probably lose their confidence on the ranking table. But the high score are the ultimate goal of education? You may take it serious right now, however, what are your considerations about the ability to face difficulties, the time management ability, the curiosity of knowledge, and the innovative spirit?The distinction should be critical because helping their school works gain one goal but fail all the others. Finally, we have to accept that our high-scored boy and girl have to do their researches independently. They have to overcome the depression and helplessness when facing tough problems, both academic and domestic.



Based on the discussion above, I strongly advocate parents to let go on their school work. Because tutoring on their homework do not effective as you imaged, but negatively influence you and your kids.


之前考过，用过模板，结果都fair，这次不拿模板写的，但是超时~哎

ioioke

The reading passage demonstrates three possible ways to save Torreya taxifoha, a type of evergreen tree in Florida, from extinction. However, the lecturer presents some new finding of this issue, showing that none of these three ways provides a satisfactory solution.



The first flaw in the passage is that the reestablishment of Torreya taxifoha is unlikely to succeed, because its original habitats are greatly affected by the changes of larger regions. The passage reckons that the micro-climate of the original areas is very suitable for Torreya taxifoha to thrive again. In contrast, the lecturer points out that many areas have(复数形式)become drier due to the global warming or the drained wetlands in Florida. That is to say, Torreya taxifoha is unlikely to survive within its original microclimate.



The passage's second flaw concerns that assisted migration of Torreya taxifoha will make them survive. But（建议使用however，but的语气太强了）, according to the lecturer, the tranplantation of Torreya taxifoha may has unpredicted outcomes for the new location. The lecturer offers an example of another kind of tree, which was moved north to a new environment. This tree spread so quickly that it killed many other native plants. Therefore, the lecturer contricts the second way to rescue Torreya taxifoha.



Finally, the although Torreya taxifoha can be easily preserved in research centers, the passage ignores that this kind of Torreya taxifoha kept in centers will not be able to ressist diseases. The population of Torreya taxifoha is supposed to be large and genetically diverse to survive diseases. These capabilities cannot be found in the population of Torreya taxifoha which preserved in research centers. Therefore, Torreya taxifoha in such centers will not be capable to survive diseases in a long time.



To sum up, the lecturer weakens three solutions from the passage respectively, indicating that none of the solutions can save this endangered tree.



亲写得真好，向你学习，看了一下，有350+的字数，会不会太多？如果时间够的话，应该也没问题，主意部分单词的拼写，有时间检查一下就好了。对了，这个植物的名字是torreya taxifoha么？

sarahpx

9.13 综合
TPO18
The reading passage demonstates three possible ways to save Torreya taxifoha, a type of everygreen tree in Florida, from extinction. However, the lecturer presents some new finding of this issue, showing that none of these three ways provides  a satisfactory solution.

The first flaw in the passage is that the reestablishment of Torreya taxifoha is unlikely to succeed, because its original habitats are greatly affected by the changes of larger regions. The passage reckons that the micro-climate of the original areas is very suitable for Torreya taxifoha to thrive again. In contrast, the lecturer points out that many areas has become drier due to the global warming or the drained wetlands in Florida. That is to say, Torreya taxifoha is unlikely to survive within its original microclimate.

The passage's second flaw concerns that assisted migration of Torreya taxifoha will make them survive. But, according to the lecturer, the tranplantation of Torreya taxifoha may has unpredicted outcomes for the new location. The lecturer offers an example of another kind of tree, which was moved north to a new environment. This tree spread so quickly that it killed many other native plants. Therefore, the lecturer contricts the second way to rescue Torreya taxifoha.

Finally, the although Torreya taxifoha can be easily preserved in research centers, the passage ignores that this kind of Torreya taxifoha kept in centers will not be able to ressist diseases. The population of Torreya taxifoha is supposed to be large and genetically diverse to survive diseases. These capabilities cannot be found in the popluation of Torreya taxifoha which preserved in research centers. Therefore, Torreya taxifoha in such centers will not be capable to survive diseases in a long time.

To sum up, the lecturer weakens three solutions from the passage respectively, indicating that none of the solutions can save this endangered tree.
（ 用另外一个方式写的，尽量减少废话了）

猫和鸭

TPO 24

The reading passage explores the issue that T.rex, a 70-milion-year-old fossil, possibly has remains of actual tissues by providing three new findings of T.rex. However, the professor from the lecture argues that this idea is skeptical. To illustrate his opinion, he presents us three sound reasons.开头简洁明了，很赞！In the first place, the soft material found inside the channels of leg bone is not necessary the remains of actual tissues. It is more likely to be something else. According to the lecture, there might be bacteria once lived in the hollows of bones. Therefore, the soft material might be the traces of soft and moist residue left by bacteria. This argument completely contradicts the first counterpart of the passage.Moreover, to challenge the second identification from the passage, the professor explains that the spheres might come from a different origin. Although the passage states that the reddish material in the spheres could be the remains of red blood cells, the professor argues that this cannot be true. He offers the fact that scientific findings of other animals also contain reddish material even though these animals did not have red blood cells when they alive. In other words, the spheres have a great chance to be something else, such as reddish minerals.
MM，你这个模板我转走啦，写得真好啊！Finally, the professor opposes the third assertion of the passage by expressing that collagen cannot last as long as seven million years. According to the lecture, people have never found collagen older than 1000 years before. The result from the passage that collagen exists in T.rex is opposite to this fact. The possible explanation for the existence of collagen is not from T.rex, but from some more recent sources. For example, it might from human skin. Then it probably came from the skins of researchers who were handling the bones.

MM，我不是来批改的，我是来学习的，我的水平太弱了，我把你的写作当成范文学习啦，实在不好意思，心虚地很啊， 不知道怎么给你改哈，希望你见谅，同时祝你考出理想的成绩！吼吼！！还有那个独立，我也真的不知道怎么改了，我怕万一给改错了就更不好了
BTW：请教一下，这个综合写作不需要一定得有个IN SUMMARY之类的结尾的吗？为毛我看到好多模板都是有这个滴呢。

kchszy061ban

蓝色为意见或建议高亮为精彩绿色为总结红色为错误

In this day and age, university professor, the most crucial backbone of higher education, is always trapped in numerous dilemmas: apply the academic exchange programs or not; attend the administrational conference or not; narrow my current research scope or not; offer the brilliant student a position or not? Eventually, they will encounter this one: what I devote myself for, academic researches or students? If they focus on the comprehensive instructions for students, significantly scientific researches will probably cease to develop. If they set back the on-class education and continuously work on science and researches, a majority of students, associated with many other people, will feel disappointed. Nevertheless,” many people think so” is not a wise excuse to follow their assertion. Generally speaking, the academic researches desire more time and afford from university professors.（开头不错，就是应该一开始就提出主论点就好了）

At the first place, it is the breakthrough of university professors’ researches that gears up the development of the whole society. Under no circumstance should I suspect that universities have a greater chance to organize precisely designed academic systems than any other kind of scientific research institutions, both on software and on hardware. For instance, equipped with the most advanced computer database system, teams of professors from Stanford University have obtained many breakthroughs in internet development, raising the total operating speed of information technology industry. What is more, undertaking meaningful researches, professors always play appropriate role to transfer their academic study into realistic application. Because of their academic status, big financial groups and manufacturing corporations contend to offer fund for the cutting-edge researches, anticipating to be the first user of professors’ outcome.

Another equivalently important factor is that strong academic capacity always benefits the university itself on many levels. Although the quality of graduated students, the range of subjects as well as their scales all have great influence, U.S. News, the most recognized university ranking, regards academic power to be the supreme dimension to evaluate the fluctuated strengthens of universities. It is not unrealistic to raise donations and sponsors by an upward ranking trend. Take my brother Mike’s school as an example. Mike is a pharmacy student in Michigan State University. His department recently received a donation for talented students, because several new patents and drugs boost their professional ranking. In other words, with good academic reputation, universities can not only take more students of high potential, but also gain financial enrichment.（这一段不错，就是应该联系下research在这里的作用）

Granted, meticulous and efficient as they are, professors have no possibility to cover researches as well as heavy teaching tasks. Lots of students will argue that it is unfair when they pay great number of tuitions yet receiving education devoid of master’s intact teaching. However, it seems that students have omitted the essentials of advanced education- figuring out how to learn by yourself. It is you not the professors who can guide you into a path towards the successful life. Namely, Mark Zuckerburg has never counted on his professors’ directions or advice to create fabulous Facebook. Libraries, tutoring classes and students’ academic groups, these study resources enable every diligent student to gain as much as they dream about during the university times. （不错）

In nutshell, considering the outweighing advantages from researches illuminated above, professors should provide more time on researches rather than on teaching.

我觉得楼主应该在最后把主题重申，总结一下就好。而且最后一段和前面联系的有点牵强额。

e,我写成27 号的独立了，麻烦帮改下吧。

sarahpx

TPO 24  (又超时了，26min烦死了，把笔记记下来的都写上去就会成这样了，快考了啊啊，求快速提高打字速度的方法……55555555)

The reading passage explores the issue that T.rex, a 70-milion-year-old fossil, possibly has remains of actual tissues by providing three new findings of T.rex. However, the professor from the lecture argues that this idea is skeptical. To illustrate his opinion, he presents us three sound reasons.

In the first place, the soft material found inside the channels of leg bone is not necessary the remains of actual tissues. It is more likely to be something else. According to the lecture, there might be bacteria once lived in the hollows of bones. Therefore, the soft material might be the traces of soft and moist residue left by bacteria. This argument completely contradicts the first counterpart of the passage.

Moreover, to challenge the second identification from the passage, the professor explains that the spheres might come from a different origin. Although the passage states that the reddish material in the spheres could be the remains of red blood cells, the professor argues that this cannot be true. He offers the fact that scientific findings of other animals also contain reddish material even though these animals did not have red blood cells when they alive. In other words, the spheres have a great chance to be something else, such as reddish minerals.

Finally, the professor opposes the third assertion of the passage by expressing that collagen cannot last as long as seven million years. According to the lecture, people have never found collagen older than 1000 years before. The result from the passage that collagen exists in T.rex is opposite to this fact. The possible explanation for the existence of collagen is not from T.rex, but from some more recent sources. For example, it might from human skin. Then it probably came from the skins of researchers who were handling the bones.

sarahpx

8.26 独立

What is the main role of the university professor, to educate students or to do research?
In this day and age, university professor, the most crucial backbone of higher education, is always trapped in numerous dilemmas: apply the academic exchange programs or not; attend the administrational conference or not; narrow my current research scope or not; offer the brilliant student a position or not? Eventually, they will encounter this one: what I devote myself for, academic researches or students? If they focus on the comprehensive instructions for students, significantly scientific researches will probably cease to develop. If they set back the on-class education and continuously work on science and researches, a majority of students, associated with many other people, will feel disappointed. Nevertheless,” many people think so” is not a wise excuse to follow their assertion. Generally speaking, the academic researches desire more time and afford from university professors.

At the first place, it is the breakthrough of university professors’ researches that gears up the development of the whole society. Under no circumstance should I suspect that universities have a greater chance to organize precisely designed academic systems than any other kind of scientific research institutions, both on software and on hardware. For instance, equipped with the most advanced computer database system, teams of professors from Stanford University have obtained many breakthroughs in internet development, raising the total operating speed of information technology industry. What is more, undertaking meaningful researches, professors always play appropriate role to transfer their academic study into realistic application. Because of their academic status, big financial groups and manufacturing corporations contend to offer fund for the cutting-edge researches, anticipating to be the first user of professors’ outcome.

Another equivalently important factor is that strong academic capacity always benefits the university itself on many levels. Although the quality of graduated students, the range of subjects as well as their scales all have great influence, U.S. News, the most recognized university ranking, regards academic power to be the supreme dimension to evaluate the fluctuated strengthens of universities. It is not unrealistic to raise donations and sponsors by an upward ranking trend. Take my brother Mike’s school as an example. Mike is a pharmacy student in Michigan State University. His department recently received a donation for talented students, because several new patents and drugs boost their professional ranking. In other words, with good academic reputation, universities can not only take more students of high potential, but also gain financial enrichment.

Granted, meticulous and efficient as they are, professors have no possibility to cover researches as well as heavy teaching tasks. Lots of students will argue that it is unfair when they pay great number of tuitions yet receiving education devoid of master’s intact teaching. However, it seems that students have omitted the essentials of advanced education- figuring out how to learn by yourself. It is you not the professors who can guide you into a path towards the successful life. Namely, Mark Zuckerburg has never counted on his professors’ directions or advice to create fabulous Facebook. Libraries, tutoring classes and students’ academic groups, these study resources enable every diligent student to gain as much as they dream about during the university times.

In nutshell, considering the outweighing advantages from researches illuminated above, professors should provide more time on researches rather than on teaching.

小兔爱twins

The reading passage exploresthe issue that human activities, including growing population, agricultureactivities and the use of pesticides, are the main reason for declines in birdpopulation. live;">（内容没有问题但是表述上不够简练。。）However, with some new findings mentioned in the lecture,the professor believes that these arguments from the passage are unconvincing.

First of all, it is stated in the passage thatbirds’ habitats are increasingly reduced because of urban growth. Theprofessor, however, contends that some birds’ population may shrink, whileothers will grow. The professor also explains that urban development actuallyprovides better and larger habitats for some other kinds of birds, such aspigeons and hawks. Therefore, it won’t cause uniform decline of bird populationin the future. And this absolutelycontradicts the first argument of the passage.有这样的对照很好 反正小作文反复强调矛盾就对了~~

The next view mentioned by（我觉得用in好 你看阅读题里面都是。。。。 mentioned in thepassage） the passage is that the growingagriculture activities destroy the wildness habitats of birds, which will causecontinuous decline of bird population. Running counter to this assertion, theprofessor expresses that less and less land is being used for agriculture everyyear. Besides, resulted from the introduce of new more productive crops, thereis no need to destroy wildness area, because the newcrops can produce more food per unit of land.比我总结的好！！！

Finally, to demur the third assertion fromthe passage that pesticides can lead to dramatic decrease of birds, theprofessor offers the fact that two changes have been made towards traditionalpesticides. First, there are less toxic pesticides. Second, there is a growingtrend to develop pest-resistant crops, which are genetically designed to beunattractive to pests. Then the pest-resistant crops reduce the need forchemical pesticides and won’t harm birds at all.


总体比我写的好~~~个人感觉~~ 在总结啊 还有细节那些处理的比我到位~~~

sarahpx

TPO 17综合写作

The reading passage explores the issue that human activities, including growing population, agriculture activities and the use of pesticides, are the main reason for declines in bird population. However, with some new findings mentioned in the lecture, the professor believes that these arguments from the passage are unconvincing.

First of all, it is stated in the passage that birds’ habitats are increasingly reduced because of urban growth. The professor, however, contends that some birds’ population may shrink, while others will grow. The professor also explains that urban development actually provides better and larger habitats for some other kinds of birds, such as pigeons and hawks. Therefore, it won’t cause uniform decline of bird population in the future. And this absolutely contradicts the first argument of the passage.

The next view mentioned by the passage is that the growing agriculture activities destroy the wildness habitats of birds, which will cause continuous decline of bird population. Running counter to this assertion, the professor expresses that less and less land is being used for agriculture every year. Besides, resulted from the introduce of new more productive crops, there is no need to destroy wildness area, because the new crops can produce more food per unit of land.

Finally, to demur the third assertion from the passage that pesticides can lead to dramatic decrease of birds, the professor offers the fact that two changes have been made towards traditional pesticides. First, there are less toxic pesticides. Second, there is a growing trend to develop pest-resistant crops, which are genetically designed to be unattractive to pests. Then the pest-resistant crops reduce the need for chemical pesticides and won’t harm birds at all.

margrate

Sara的作文写的真好，我是欣赏着读下来的，除了字数有些多，感觉有些臃肿外，其他都很好，对比的很充实！
真感觉没有什么必要改的！