ARGUMENT 41求拍

waywong

掐时间写的。。。。之前看了看了点分析提示。。。求拍

The argument is well presented and appears to be relatively sound at first glance, the author recommends that the government should concentrate more on educating people about bicycle safety and less on the encouraging or requiring bicyclists to wear helmets.However, a close scrutiny about the argument will reveal that several assumptions are suspicious or unstated, thus make the argument less cogent and convincing.



Initially, the arguer cites two surveys and he supposes that each of the survey's design (such as the selection of the sample, the management of the data, the verification of the outcomes) and implement are in strict accordance with the scientific process; the conclusion is objective and neutral; the people who are in charge of the survey have no influence on other beneficial factors. These surveys are the one which the argument are depended.  However, the arguer does not give enough evidences and information to support this assumptions, thus may lose the major meaning of this argument.

Besides, these surveys indicate that the more bicycle-related accidents have occurred while more and more people wear helmets.For this situation, the arguer offer following assumptions.First, the quality of previous helmets is the same as the current helmets. Second, the arguer supposes that there are no other factors which can cause bicycle-related accidents.The two assumptions are unreasonable, for the reason that actually there are many other influential factors, such as the more and more bicyclists, not enough bicycle lines, the promoted limited speed of bicycle.



Furthermore, the arguer suggests that government should concentrate more on education people about bicycle safety and less on encouraging or requiring bicyclists to wear helmets.The arguer needs give assumptions that the educational courses about bicycle safety can appeal to common people, government will continue to implement this plan.Likewise, he needs assume that the mean vehicle in the future is still the bicycle.In addition, the arguer supposes that wearing helmets is not significant for protecting the bicyclists. Thus, it means that there is no need for people to wear helmets. However, this assumption is far away from the common sense.



To sum up, this argument is not on sound reasoning, the arguer fails to give precise explanations to his assumptions.In order to bolster the argument, the arguer should provide more accurate explanations to validate his assumptions.Besides, the arguer should rule out the above mentioned possibilities that would undermine the claim.

普渡哥

第一句话就有问题，appear应该放在前面一点，不然你的前一半意思就是肯定

waywong

第一句话就有问题，appear应该放在前面一点，不然你的前一半意思就是肯定

-- by 会员 普渡哥 (2012/5/22 5:35:46)

好的。谢谢普渡哥了！！

竹林中人

关于第二段，我不建议这么写，不需要你去讲一个调查该怎么做，而需要你在文章中指出这个调查的不合理，具体的，而不是从抽象的，否则你这个段落就没有意义了

竹林中人

另外，以后附上提纲和题目吧，这么看很难受的，你自己也有感受