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楼主
发表于 2013-3-4 21:24:10 | 只看该作者 回帖奖励 |倒序浏览 |阅读模式
4.20四战托福了!一定要一举成功啊!上次托福100分,作文25,这次一定要冲向30!恳请大家监督,互相帮助~请狠批狠批狠批!!非常珍惜大家的宝贵意见~~~
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沙发
 楼主| 发表于 2013-3-4 21:25:40 | 只看该作者
Mar 4.  独立写作
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
It's more important for government to spend money to build art museums and music performance center than to build recreational facilities(such as swimming pool, playgrounds)

交作业

The government builds facilities to help citizens to live a better life. Some people believe that it is more essential to build art museums and music performance because it is a spiritual enhancement. Other people disagree and they think building recreational facilities for people to exercise is more of importance. In fact, it is such a paradox that government should focus on mental relaxation or physical improvement and as far as I am concerned, recreational facilities are more key factors to people's daily lives than art museums and music performance centers.

To begin with, more citizens go to do sports than citizens who appreciate art and they spend more time on the recreational facilities than museums. Government is a institution that serve the country and states. What government does should consider about majority's interest first. If there are two choices, health or art, the government definitely need to improve people's health status because without health, we can do nothing, going to museums included. After the basic need is met, the government can plan for the next step. By creating more recreational facilities, citizens will have places to swim, play football, keep fit and so on, which tremendously diversify their lives.

Moreover, by building more recreational facilities, people can get rid of tedious work and study to relax and exercise. With the rapid pace of modern society, people are getting more and more unhealthy because of the heavy workload and increasing pressure. Greater percentage of women in 30s cannot get pregnant under stress in metropolitans. The age in which people have cancers is younger and many cases are that people died of long time working and tiredness. It is a serious problem that government are highly paying attention to. To better the situation, government should spend more money in building the recreational facilities to give people more chances and places to take exercises. As long as there are facilities to recreate, people tend to go out to breath fresh air and invite friends to play together, which as the same time deepen the friendship with others.

Besides, government cannot only put all the effort on building playgrounds. To keep balance, government also need to put some money into the art museums since there are still a part of people who are keen on art and they do not like sports. Government cannot force all of the people to do sports instead of seeing beautiful things. Boston, for instance, has numbers of museums since more than half of the people went to universities and colleges. Therefore, it depends on the different circumstances among cities.

In the conclusion, government should spend more money wisely on building more recreational facilities but the situation might be different in various cities so they may also pay some attention on the museums and cinemas. Only in this way, can government keep its promise to the citizens to serve them a better and healthier lives.
板凳
发表于 2013-3-5 13:41:11 | 只看该作者
3。4独立写作

The government builds facilities to help citizens to live a better life.(有点突兀,可以以说It is the obligation…. Some people believe that it is more essential to build art museums and music performance because it is a spiritual enhancement. Other people disagree and they think building recreational facilities for people to exercise is more of importance. In fact, it is such a paradox that government should focus on mental relaxation or physical improvement and as far as I am concerned, recreational facilities are more key factors(…不能这样用吧。。) to people's daily lives than art museums and music performance centers.

To begin with, more citizens go to do sports than citizens who appreciate art and they spend more time on the recreational facilities than museums. Government is a
n institution that serves the country and states. What government does should consider about(consider 的主语应该是人吧,事情不能说consider aboutshould be on one’s behalf) majority's interest first. If there are two choices, health or art, the government definitely needs to improve people's health status because without health, we can do nothing, going to museums included(not to mention…..). After(only if) the basic need is met, the government can plan for the next step. By creating more recreational facilities, citizens will have places to swim, play football, keep fit and so on, which tremendously diversify their lives.

Moreover, by building more recreational facilities, people can get rid of tedious work and study to relax and exercise. With the rapid pace of modern society, people are getting more and more
unhealthy because of the heavy workload and increasing pressure. Greater percentage of women in 30s cannot get pregnant under stress in metropolitans. The age in which people have cancers is younger and many cases are that people died of long time working and tiredness(in many case, people in increasing number…..). It is a serious problem that government are(is) highly paying attention to. To better the situation, government should spend more money in building the recreational facilities to give people more chances and places to take exercises. As long as there are facilities to recreate, people tend to go out to breath fresh air and invite friends to play together, which as the same time deepen(reinforce) the friendship with others.(楼主很爱用and 连接,我觉得还是少用吧。)

Besides, government cannot only put all the effort on building playgrounds. To keep balance, government also need to put some money into the art museums since there are still a part of people who are keen on art and they do not like sports. Government cannot force all of the people to do sports instead of seeing beautiful things. Boston, for instance, has numbers of museums since more than half of the people went to universities and colleges. Therefore, it depends on the different circumstances among cities.
最后最好点下你的中心,让步,不要变成真的换方向

In the conclusion, government should spend more money wisely on building more recreational facilities but the situation might be different in various cities so they may also pay some attention on the museums and cinemas. Only in this way can government keep its promise to the citizens to serve them a better and healthier
liveslife.

有些地方的用语不是很地道,但是又不缺乏亮点。小错误需要注意。
地板
 楼主| 发表于 2013-3-5 20:04:26 | 只看该作者
Mar 4 独立写作 修改:
It is the obligation that the government builds facilities to help citizens to live a better life.(有点突兀,可以以说It is the obligation…. Some people believe that it is more essential to build art museums and music performance because it is a spiritual enhancement. Other people disagree and they think building recreational facilities for people to exercise is more of importance. In fact, it is such a paradox that government should focus on mental relaxation or physical improvement and as far as I am concerned, recreational facilities are more significant to people's daily lives than art museums and music performance centers.

To begin with, more citizens go to do sports than citizens who appreciate art and they spend more time on the recreational facilities than museums. Government is a
n institution that serves the country and states. What government does should on behalf of majority's interest first. If there are two choices, health or art, the government definitely needs to improve people's health status because without health, we can do nothing, going to museums included(not to mention…..). After(only if) the basic need is met, the government can plan for the next step. By creating more recreational facilities, citizens will have places to swim, play football, keep fit and so on, which tremendously diversifies their lives.

Moreover, by building more recreational facilities, people can get rid of tedious work and study to relax and exercise. With the rapid pace of modern society, people are getting more and more
unhealthy because of the heavy workload and increasing pressure. Greater percentage of women in 30s cannot get pregnant under stress in metropolitans. The age in which people have cancers is younger and in many cases, an growing number of people died of long time working and tiredness. As phenomenon shows, it is a serious problem that government ought to highly paying attention to. To better the situation, government should spend more money in building the recreational facilities to give people more chances and places to take exercises. As long as there are facilities to recreate, people tend to go out to breathe fresh air and invite friends to play together, which as the same time reinforce the friendship with others.(楼主很爱用and 连接,我觉得还是少用吧。)

Besides, government cannot only put all the effort on building playgrounds. To keep balance, government also need to put some funds into the art museums since there are still a part of people who are keen on art and they do not like sports. Government cannot force all of the people to do sports instead of seeing beautiful things. Boston, for instance, has numbers of museums as more than half of the people went to universities and colleges. Therefore, it depends on the different circumstances among cities if government intends to build art museums but again, the authorities still need to place considerate emphasis on the recreational facilities.
最后最好点下你的中心,让步,不要变成真的换方向

In the conclusion, government should spend more money wisely on building more recreational facilities but the situation might be different in various cities so they may also pay some attention to the museums and cinemas. Only in this way can government keep its promise to the citizens to serve them a better and healthier
lives.




有些地方的用语不是很地道,但是又不缺乏亮点。小错误需要注意。
5#
 楼主| 发表于 2013-3-5 21:10:33 | 只看该作者
March 5
Independent Writing:
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
For success in a future job, the ability to relate well topeople is more important than studying hard in school.

It is well known that people work to show their value tosociety. To success in the future career, some people tend to build theirnetwork step by step and other people claim that studying is more of greatimportance to train their abilities. From my point of view, the ability torelate well to people is more important than studying hard in school becausethey can

In the first place, admittedly studyinghard in school does have some merits when people first step in the work. Itmakes people stand out of others who are competing the same position as theirscores are higher than others, which means these people are more potential,hardworking and willing to sacrifice leisure time. So the Human Resourcemanager would definitely choose the students with more beautiful performance atschool, however, this is the only benefit for the straight A students.

As the time goes on, people's scores in school are no longercounted as influential as the network. The knowledge is updated quicklynowadays. Most of us did not have personal computers two decades ago and wewere using Windows 1997 a decade ago but people cannot use the informationlearnt ten years ago to solve the problem of Windows eight or Android. Evenyesterday a person just acquired a piece ofnews, it probably cannot applied to today's situation let along the knowledge acquainted from school. Studying hard in school doesnot mean doing well in work since there are tons of new things coming up thatdid not appear on books before.

What is important, network is the acceleratorwhen people have worked for several years. The experts indicated that peoplewho are in the middle-level of the management teams need more recommendation from coworkers and managers to get tohigher positions. My uncle became a partner in his 30s because he can deal withother people well and the other partners spoke highly of him. He also has abunch of clients who trust him and treat him as a friend in private. Thebattles in office are never easier than studying hard in school. All employersare willing to get promoted and the person whocan relate well to others gets more opportunities to win this"fight".

To draw the conclusion, although studying hard in school isessential when people first look for a job, it is more beneficial to have avaluable network with coworkers, seniors and clients after a few years work.The society is made by all kinds of people. Relating well to people is likedoing art that is more difficult but if they can grasp the essence of how toget along with others, they can make a wonderful success without doubt.
6#
发表于 2013-3-6 13:49:17 | 只看该作者
It is well known that people work to show their value to society. To success in the future career, some people tend to build their network step by step and other people claim that studying is more of great importance to train their abilities. From my point of view, the ability to relate well to people is more important than studying hard in school because they can(没有写完)

In the first place, admittedly studying hard in school does have some merits when people first step in the work. It makes people stand out of others who are competing the same position as their scores are higher than others, which means these people are more potential, hardworking and willing to sacrifice leisure time. So the Human Resource manager would definitely choose the students with more beautiful performance at school,
however, this is the only benefit for the straight A students(没有看懂).

As the time goes on, people's scores in school are no longer counted as influential as the network. The knowledge is updated quickly nowadays. Most of us did not have personal computers two decades ago and we were using Windows 1997 a decade ago
but(这里转折有点牵强,没有电脑,用就系统,和不能用过去的信息解决问题是因果关系吧) people cannot use the information learnt ten years ago to solve the problem of Windows eight or Android. Even yesterday a person just acquired a piece of news, it probably cannot be applied to today's situation let along the knowledge acquainted from schoolnews be apply to situation. 我觉得有点奇怪,可以说 cannot not keep pace with today’s situation . Studying hard in school does not mean doing well in work since there are tons of new things coming up that did not appear on books before.(有点脱节的感觉最后一句的。可以往前移,到这段第三句比较好。)

What is important, network is the accelerator
catalystwhen people have worked for several years. The experts indicated that people who are in the middle-level of the management teams need more recommendation from coworkers and managers to get to higher positions. My uncle became a partner in his 30s because he can deal with other people well and the other partners spoke highly of him. He also has hada bunch of clients who trust him and treat him as a friend in private. The battles in office are never easier than studying hard in school. All employers are willingeager to get promoted and the person who can relate well to others getsobtain more opportunities to win this "fight".

To draw the conclusion, although studying hard in school is essential when people first look for a job, it is more beneficial to have a valuable network with coworkers, seniors and clients after a few years work. The society is made by all kinds of people. Relating well to people is like
doing art这表达太中文了吧that is more difficult but if they can grasp the essence of how to get along with others, they can make a wonderful success without doubt.

有些地方表达还是要斟酌下。不过字数真心很多==30分钟能写这么多很厉害
7#
 楼主| 发表于 2013-3-6 20:49:34 | 只看该作者
Verified Version:


It is well known that people work to show their value to society. To success in the future career, some people tend to build their network step by step and other people claim that studying is more of great importance to train their abilities. From my point of view, the ability to relate well to people is more important than studying hard in school and I will illustrate the reasons as follows. (没有写完)

In the first place, admittedly studying hard in school does have some merits when people first step in the work. It makes people stand out of others who are competing the same position as their scores are higher than others, which means these people are more potential, hardworking and willing to sacrifice leisure time. So the Human Resource manager would definitely choose the students with more beautiful performance at school,
however, this is the only benefit for the straight A students(没有看懂).

As the time goes on, people's scores in school are no longer counted as influential as the network. The knowledge is updated quickly nowadays.
Studying hard in school does not mean doing well in work since there are tons of new things coming up that did not appear on books before.(有点脱节的感觉最后一句的。可以往前移,到这段第三句比较好。) The Spiral of Silence is a popular theory in Communication to explain that people stay silent when their opinions are different from others and in this manner the mainstream is more and more in the major place as those who perceive their opinion in the minority do not speak up any more, however, this hypothesis is proved wrong on the internet.   (这里转折有点牵强,没有电脑,用就系统,和不能用过去的信息解决问题是因果关系吧)So people cannot use the information learnt three decades ago to solve the problem by now. Even yesterday a person just acquired a piece of news, it probably cannot not keep pace with today’s situation let along the knowledge acquainted from schoolnews be apply to situation. 我觉得有点奇怪,可以说 cannot not keep pace with today’s situation .

What is important, network is the
catalyst when people have worked for several years. The experts indicated that people who are in the middle-level of the management teams need more recommendation from coworkers and managers to get to higher positions. My uncle became a partner in his 30s because he can deal with other people well and the other partners spoke highly of him. He also had a bunch of clients who trust him and treat him as a friend in private. The politics in office are never easier than studying hard in school. All employers are willingeager to get promoted and the person who can relate well to others obtains more opportunities to win this "fight".
To draw the conclusion, although studying hard in school is essential when people first look for a job, it is more beneficial to have a valuable network with coworkers, seniors and clients after a few years work. The society is made by all kinds of people. Relating well to people is like
making art work这表达太中文了吧that is more difficult but if they can grasp the essence of how to get along with others, they can make a wonderful success without doubt.

有些地方表达还是要斟酌下。不过字数真心很多==30分钟能写这么多很厉害
8#
 楼主| 发表于 2013-3-10 20:57:15 | 只看该作者
Mar 10 integrated writing:
In the listening passage, theprofessor casts doubt on the three possible solutions to the survival of  Torreya taxifoha, while the reading passagebelieve that Torreya can be reestablished, movedto other places or planted in research centers.

In the first place, the professordisagrees that it is unlikely successful for Torreya to be reestablished in thesame location in Florida where wetter and cooler microclimate exists stated inthe reading. Because of global warming, the total temperatureincreases in the larger region and microclimate is affectedby it. Wetland drained in Florida changes the microclimate as well. As aresult, scientists cannot plant Torreya seeds in the same spot again.

What is more, the listeningpassage claims that the second option given in the reading is still notpractical to move Torreya to further north area. The Black Locks, for instance,spread quickly in a different location. Theykilled many trees and plants there especially some of which were endangered.The result of moving Torreya to another place is probably dangerous and unpredictable.

Besides, the professor also refutes the idea ofpreserving Torreya in research centers in the reading passage. Since the population of Torreya is large, it needs huge andgenetic diversified environment to grow healthily.Apparently, small labs cannot resist the diseases of trees in a long term.Therefore the research centers do not have the capacity to raise Torreya.


In conclusion, the listening passage totally contradicts three options brought by the reading passage about how to save Torreya in a declining population.
9#
 楼主| 发表于 2013-3-11 10:08:45 | 只看该作者
3.10  Independent Writing:
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Most people often let others make decisions for them ratherthan
make decisions by themselves.

With the rapid changes in society, there are variousdifficult or easy chocies for a person to make during his or her entirelifetime. Some people may argue that people tend to let others to makedecisions for themselves while others think that majority make decisions bytheir own. Both opinions are reasonable in a manner, however, I do believe thatmost people make their decisions because it isvital for them to decide their own life rather than letting someone elsedetermine the path and direction.

Admittedly, sometimes some people ask others to decidewhether they should do a certain thing or not. It depends on the degree of thesituation. If the situation is rather miniature, for instance, to buy a bottleof P&G or Unilever shampoo. Most people can take action within two minutes.On the other hand, it is difficult for people to choose a suitable apartment ora luxury car. The problem is that the degree of the two situation: the amountof money consumed is dramatically arranged from $8 to $800,000. Of coursepeople would ask others' opinions to decrease their time to make the latterdecision.

However, it is much different from asking people's opinionto just letting others to make decisions for them. After asking people'sattitude toward the problem, a person has to clear his or her own mind to drawa satisfactory conclusion. After all the problem is not others' business andthey sometimes may easily make a wrong or biased decision because they cannot spiritually feel as deep as the person who reallydesperately needs a answer. Letting others take the lead is like tossing thedice with irresponsible and random results. Evenif they make the decision whereas the person suddenly hate the choice, theperson would blame all the fault to others andthese people who make the decision have to be complaint in a wired way.

From my point of view, some people let others make theirdecisions but in most cases, people trust their own instinct and make the finaldecision which is of importance to themselves not others. In the process,people ask others' thought if the circumstance is relativelytough. All in all, it is a person's response to own their life and make itglorious. Only knowing how to make decisions, can human beings enjoy freedomafter the wise choice.
10#
 楼主| 发表于 2013-3-11 21:13:38 | 只看该作者
Mar 11  Independent Writing:
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
看电视比看书学的多。

Numerous people are addicted to TV nowadays. These peoplehold the opinion that people can learn more knowledge when they are watchingtelevision than reading books. However, I disagree with it and favor thatreading books gives people more valuable knowledge. I shall illustrate myreasons as followed.

Books present comprehensive and complex knowledge to people while TV is only a recreation.Nobody can acquire all the knowledge of thequantum mechanics after watching a TV episode but can gain it from several Physics books. One would sit down and hold a book, apiece of paper and a pen to calculate and to think thoroughlywhat equation means while watching TV is like having a fast food-the persongains news quickly but he or she cannot digest and make full use of the nutrition of the knowledge. In most cases, peopleintend to watch television to relax, have fun and have something in common totalk about with others. These information is not counted as real"knowledge". Serious knowledge is well structured so people need topay attention to actually learn details and chapters to consist a whole package of understanding.

Moreover, reading book can also help to form a sincere value towards life. Though some TV seriesalso broadcast some biographies or documentaries,it is just a snap of the knowledge. People accidently watch commercials thatare everywhere in the screens, many of which are boosting materialism and theimportance to purchase expensive goods. It is so distracted that some peoplecannot have a positive attitude to live in the society since their desire isaroused to compete with others' belongings. Whereas reading book makes peoplebe alone to calm down and enjoy each and every words the authors tend to bringabout which are another kinds of knowledge useful for life.

In addition, some TV episodes are no doubt bring sort ofknowledge to the audience, for instance, news critics and introduction of wildbeings in CNN, BBC, National Geographic and Discovery. This kind of knowledgeis more vivid than words in books so people will experience the certaincircumstances throughout the entire story.

To draw the conclusion, although people can gain someknowledge to some extent through watching TV, books show systematic knowledge and life value that is more like aphilosophic knowledge to people. Therefore, reading books is more vital thanwatching television if people are willing to acquaintknowledge.
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