TWE014----帮忙改一下作文，顺便看看能得多少分（1—5）。谢谢。

Topic: 14.Some people believe that university students should be required to attend classes. Others believe that going to classes should be optional for students. Which point of view do you agree with? Use specific reasons and details to explain your answer.

Do students need to keep attending classes every day? I cannot deny that it is a hot issue in the modern society. Most people consider that attending classes is the most important responsibility for students, because attendance is always considered as a necessary condition to achieve a good mark. However, in my opinion, going to classes should be optional for students. That is because attending classes optionally can provide good study efficiency and help students manage their time and improve their weakness. In the following discussion, I will provide evidences to support my point of view.

 First of all, attending classes optionally facilitates study efficiency. Not attendance but efficiency can provide high scores. There is a common/frequent phenomenon that we are all familiar with, that is some students fall asleep in the class, even though the professor is speaking loudly and passionately. It is correct to say that attending classes frequently accumulates a beautiful attendance record on their final report cards, but only good concentration help students acquire knowledge in class. In the other words, their efficiency is zero, meaning that they are wasting their precious time being in class. These students seem working hard, and hopefully study well. But, on the contrary, they can neither absorb the knowledge which professors focus, nor sleep well to have a good rest, so that their efficiency is still low in the following classes. As a result, mostly they cannot have a high mark as they expected. Therefore, the best way is probably skipping one of the classes to take a short nap, and keep best mood and efficiency in other classes.

 Second of all, attending classes optionally can help students manage their time. As we know, university is a good place in which students can develop their basic vocational abilities. Basically, students’ knowledge and sociable skills both need to be improved, especially during their university life. Thus, there are usually variety of activities have been held in universities. At times, activities conflict with students’ schedule. However, if attending is optional, they can decide which one is more important for their futures, and make relevant adjustment.

 Third of all, attending classes optionally can help students improve their weakness. Different people have different advantages and disadvantages. For getting a high mark in university, spending more time on their weak subject is necessary and useful. For example, if a student is good at mathematics but weak in English, he should spend more time to learn and practise English. If he can excel in calculus by self-study, he may skip some of the calculus classes to save some time for English. Hereby, attending classes optionally can help students gain a better mark on their weak subject.

 Consequently, on the basis of the discussion above, attending classes optionally can provide good study efficiency and help students manage their time and improve their weakness. To nurture students’ abilities, university should allow students to attend classes optionally.

模板的痕迹有点过于明显，如"first of all" "second of all" "third of all"，略显僵化，可考虑变换一下。

P.S.我不是大虾，个人观点，仅供参考。

比较晚了, 看了一段, 看不下去了(太困了)

Most people consider that attending classes is the most important responsibility for students, because attendance is always considered as a necessary condition to achieve a good mark.

这句话你翻成中文看看, 没逻辑的(也许和个人理解有关, 这种问题不大不必在意).

应该是没这种用法的, 有些从中文直接翻过去的用法要注意一下.

明天记得到的话再来继续看, 睡觉....

Do students need to keep attending classes every day? I cannot deny that it is a hot issue in the modern society. Most people regard attending classes as the most important responsibility for students, because attendance is always considered a necessary condition for achieving good marks. However, in my opinion, attending classes should be optional for students, for optional attendance can help students improve study efficiency, manage time and mend weakness.

First of all, attending classes optionally facilitates study efficiency. Not attendance but efficiency can provide high scores.  We are all familiar with a common/frequent phenomenon that some students fall asleep in the class, even though professor speaks loudly and passionately. In the other words, they are wasting precious time being in class, they can neither absorb the knowledge focused by professor nor sleep well, and they cannot have a high mark as they expected since their studying efficiency is low in the following classes. Such kind of attending classes only accumulates a beautiful attendance record on their final report cards rather than good marks in test.  Therefore, the best way is probably skipping one of the classes to take a short nap to keep best concentration and efficiency in other classes.

 Second of all, attending classes optionally can help students manage their time. As university is a good place where students can develop basic vocational abilities, study knowledge and enhance social skills, it dertainly provides variety of activities that may conflict with students’ schedule. If attendance is optional, students can decide that which one, attending classes or participating activity, is more important for their futures, and make relevant adjustment.

 Third of all, attending classes optionally can help students mend their weakness. Different people have different advantages and disadvantages. To get high marks in university, spending more time on their weak subjects is necessary and useful. For example, if a student is good at mathematics but weak in English, he should spend more time to learn and practice English. If he can excel in calculus by self-study, he may skip some of the calculus classes for studying English. Hereby, attending classes optionally can help students gain better marks on their weak subjects.  liver" datetime="2007-05-03T08:52">

Consequently, on the basis of the discussion above, I believe that attending classes optionally can help students improve study efficiency, manage time and mend weakness

个人观点,望指正!