lunating：欢迎各种拍砖！各位亲要狠狠监督我哇><

lunating · 发表于 2012-6-16 00:37:57

luna来袭

虽然没有坚实的基础，但是我一定会有坚持的恒心！

7月28号决战托福，人生中第一次想可劲可劲准备一场考试，希望能有好的结果，所以努力付出吧！

目前，自我总结作文缺点：
1. 不具备充足、准确、逻辑、严密的观点；
2. 句型把握不准，词汇量偏少，实例储蓄不足；
3. 时间太长，打字不够迅速、准确；
4. 整体结构松散，不够严谨。

在未来接近一个月的时间里，我要坚持每天写一篇综合+独立，及时发现自己的缺点，总结并改正，风雨无阻！不要给我任何理由，我不相信！记住，不要找任何借口。用心准备吧！在青春的尾巴上挥霍下那些即将逝去的激情！

各位亲，我们共同加油吧！欢迎大家监督我，欢迎各种拍砖，快，狠，准！Over!

lunating · 发表于 2012-6-16 01:05:16

6月15日110514 ML 独立
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? It was easier for people in the past to identify which type of career or job would have a secure or successful future.

Whether it is easier or not for people in the past to identify which kind of jobs would have a stable and successful future is a magnet for controversy. In the process of human civilization, with the rapid economic development, the opportunity and satisfaction for a job is variable. From my angle of the view, I absolutely agree with the above statement. In this essay, I will highlight three main points.

In the past, as the economy slowed, the increased social stability led to fewer job opportunities for people. Furthermore, working into state-owned enterprises or major corporations was the only goal for those people. As for China, however, with the development of Chinese reform and opening-up, all kinds of enterprises have sprung up like mushrooms. Consequently, people feel completely in the dark when selecting and applying for jobs.

Since the enrollment expansion of higher education, the number of college graduates has been soaring faster than the increase of job vacancies. What’s more, more and more Chinese oversea students come back to hunt better working chances. It is sure that the competition is definitely fierce. Thus, both job seeker and staffs are under great pressure. For example, the 13th jump events of Foxconn in 2010 have shown the extreme work stress. Obviously, from the perspective of pressure, the choice of a great job opportunity is far much tough than before. So it is not surprising and understandable that it is easier for people in the past to choose a good job.

Finally, the lower pace of life and the higher happiness index made the life easier in the past. Nowadays, the pace of life is getting faster and people are carrying much greater pressure than before. Gradually time has become the most precious for some people, such as professional managers and some white collars who are always as busy as a bee. That time is money is widely believed among these people. It is very natural and essential for them to allocate their time rationally. That is to say they must spend time on something more important. As a result, their daily life also become extremely monotonous.

In conclusion, I believe that it is easier for people in the past to identify which type of career or job would have a secure or successful future. In addition, the ongoing economic globalization and rapid advancements of science and technology have generated unprecedented conditions of global economic and social development. We will find that the work is more hardship under diversification environment. Thus, we should always be prepared for a job at any moment.

lunating · 发表于 2012-6-16 01:06:21

6月15日 TPO23 综合
In the lecture, the professor is skeptical about the hypotheses of the reading passage about the population decline of the yellow cedar. The professor argues that none of the explanations in the reading passage is adequate.

Firstly, in the reading passage, the author considers that the drop of the yellow cedar may be for the reason of the cedar bark beetle which attacks the trees and eats the wood . On the contrary, the professor says that healthy cedars are not likely to suffer from insect damage because the bark and leaves of yellow cedars are poisonous to insects.

On top of that, the reading passage describes that the reason of decline is the brown bears for destroying trees. However, the professor asserts that although bears damage trees but not the overall population. Furthermore, there were no bears on the islands where the population is still in decline.

Finally, the professor disproves the reading’s idea that climate change may cause the decrease. The professor, however, points out that more trees are dying in a warm weather of the lower elevations. So, the change of climate may not kill the trees.

kchszy061ban · 发表于 2012-6-16 17:00:55

蓝色为意见或建议高亮为精彩绿色为总结红色为错误

In the lecture, the professor is skeptical about the hypotheses of(in) the reading passage about the population decline of the yellow cedar. The professor argues that none of the(these) explanations in the reading passage(建议去掉)is（are） adequate.

Firstly, in the reading passage, the author considers that the drop of the yellow cedar may be for the reason of the cedar bark beetle which attacks the trees and eats the wood . On the contrary, the professor says that healthy cedars are not likely to suffer from insect damage because the bark and leaves of yellow cedars are poisonous to insects.（这段感觉有一点就是，已经死亡的cedars原来就已经sick，然后虫才导致死？虽然说了健康的树不易死亡，但是还是觉得把这说出来好）

On top of that, the reading passage describes that the reason of decline is the brown bears for（because they） destroying trees. However, the professor asserts that although bears damage trees but not the overall population（把 population，换为decline）. Furthermore, there were no bears on the islands where the population is still in decline.（然后再写一个结束语，总结这个不是？）

Finally, the professor disproves the reading’s idea that climate change may cause the decrease. The professor, however, points out that more trees are dying in a warm weather of the lower elevations. So, the change of climate may not kill the trees.（然后这个说的是，低海拔地区应该比高纬度地区所受伤害小，然而事实并不是这样，而不是你所说的kill the trees，这样简单额）

1听力的内容放为重点，阅读也重要，听力的点首先要说的全面额；

2 luna的of 短语用的好多，可以换下句式不？

3 最后一段luna几乎不写阅读部分了，只写听力？

不过luna的单词拼写都正确，表达意思都很准确。

kchszy061ban · 发表于 2012-6-16 17:32:42

luna你的建议太好了，一起加油哈。那我以后就少写结尾段了。我单词拼写问题太大。还有就是句式的使用上面。

lunating · 发表于 2012-6-16 20:52:04

嘿嘿，谢谢亲亲banban的建议，这篇文章我会好好修改的。

我发现首先篇幅就太短了，还有句型要多变，词汇（v. a. ab.）的积累都是要解决的。

当然，最基本的就是要点和细节的把握，阅读和听力都要囊括。

zombiee · 发表于 2012-6-16 22:46:19

6月15日110514 ML 独立
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? It was easier for people in the past to identify which type of career or job would have a secure or successful future.

Whether it is easier or not for people in the past to identify which kind of jobs would have a stable and successful future is a magnet for controversy. In the process of human civilization, with the rapid economic development, the opportunity and satisfaction for a job is variable. From my angle of the view, I absolutely agree with the above statement. In this essay, I will highlight three main points.

In the past, as the economy slowed(换个说法), the increased social stability led to fewer job opportunities for people.(这句话没明白逻辑) Furthermore, working into state-owned enterprises or major corporations was the only goal for those people. As for China, however, with the development of Chinese reform and opening-up（是不是with the reform and opening-up policy,如果加物主代词也是China‘s）, all kinds of enterprises have sprung up like mushrooms. Consequently,（这个是上文的结果吗，应该用But） people feel completely in the dark when selecting and applying for jobs.时态

Since the enrollment expansion of higher education, the number of college graduates has been soaring faster than the increase of job vacancies. What’s more, more and more Chinese oversea students come back to hunt better working chances. It is sure that the competition is definitely fierce. Thus, both job seeker and staffs are under great pressure. For example, the 13th jump events of Foxconn in 2010 have shown the extreme work stress. Obviously, from the perspective of pressure, the choice of a great job opportunity is far much tough than before. So it is not surprising and understandable that it is easier for people in the past to choose a good job.

Finally, the lower pace of life and the higher happiness index made换个词 the life easier in the past. Nowadays, the pace of life is getting faster and people are carrying much greater pressure than before. Gradually time has become the most precious+名词 for some people, such as professional managers and some white collars who are always as busy as a bee. That time is money is widely believed among these people. It is very natural and essential for them to allocate their time rationally. That is to say they must spend time on something more important. As a result, their daily life also become extremely monotonous.

In conclusion, I believe that it is easier for people in the past to identify which type of career or job would have a secure or successful future. In addition, the ongoing economic globalization and rapid advancements of science and technology have generated unprecedented conditions of global economic and social development. We will find that the work is more hardship under diversification environment. Thus, we should always be prepared for a job at any moment.

-- by 会员 lunating (2012/6/16 1:05:16)

全文没有体现identify这个题中的词，所以，有点偏题。句子内部和句间逻辑不太连贯。
第一篇写成这样不错了，加油

lunating · 发表于 2012-6-17 20:05:05

6.16 TPO24 综合

The reading passage concentrates on the issue of the remains of the actual animal tissues of Tyranosaurus rex (T. rex), the professor in the lecture also deals with the same topic. However, he is skeptical about the identifications of the author.

First, the author suggests that the soft substance inside the channels should be the remains of T.rex. The professor argues that the substance may be something else. This is because when bacteria colonize, they leave behind some kind of material, which means the substance might be traces of soft residue left behind by bacteria colonies. Obviously, the professor disproves the author's opinion.

Furthermore, despide the statement of the reading passage that the remains could be spheres, the professor thinks that the spheres can be found in the same place of other animals. In other words, the spheres probably a different origin.

Finally, the professor asserts that collagen doesn't come from the T.rex while the author of the reading passage insists on it. The professor proves that is unreasonable by pointing out that collagen can't live so long and it may come from researchers' skin.

lunating · 发表于 2012-6-17 20:52:41

6.17 TPO1 综合

The reading passage concentrates on the issue of employees prefer to work four days a week with 80 percent of their original pay. The professor in the lecture also deals with the same topic. However, the professor is skeptical about the ideas of the reading passage.

First, the author in the reading suggests that companies profits will be increased while the work weeks is cut down. The professor argues that shorten workweek increases comanies spend, this is because more new workers need to be added which requires more space and computer in this situation. Obviously, the professor disproves the author's opinion.

Futhermore, dispite the statement of the reading passage that 4-day workweek reduces unemplyment rates, the professor thinks that the companies will ask the employees working overtime and raise their expctations to employees.That is to say, the employees need to do the same amount of 5-day workweek which lead them unpleasant.

Finally, the professor asserts that shorten work weeks will result some risk while the author states that it is better for employees to increase their life quality. The professor proves that 4-day workweek decreases job stability and lost the promotion chance easily compared with 5-day work week employees.

包子不包子 · 发表于 2012-6-17 21:02:11

6.16 TPO24 综合

The reading passage concentrates on the issue of the remains of the actual animal tissues of Tyranosaurus rex (T. rex), the professor in the lecture also deals with the same topic. However, he is skeptical about the identifications of the author.

First, the author suggests that the soft substance inside the channels should be the remains of T.rex. The professor argues that the substance may be something else. This is because when bacteria colonize...hollows 没写完啊, they leave behind some kind of material, which means the substance might be traces of soft residue left behind by bacteria colonies. Obviously, the professor disproves the author's opinion.

Furthermore, despide the statement of the reading passage that the remains could be spheres remains are examined to contain spheres, the professor thinks that the spheres can be werefound in the same place of other animals. In other words, the spheres probably a different origin.少动词这句
这一点没听好吧少了重要信息 red blood cells
Finally, the professor asserts that collagen doesn't come from the T.rex while the author of the reading passage insists on it. The professor proves that is unreasonable by pointing out that collagen can't live so long and it may come from researchers' skin. 可以再详细一些把听到相关collagen的数据写出来在说明这些数据为什么能推翻文章的例证

这篇听力听得不是很好啊导致有些点的逻辑不是很有力
其他方面还是很好的
听力努力哈加油~

lunating：欢迎各种拍砖！各位亲要狠狠监督我哇><

6月15日110514 ML 独立

6月15日 TPO23 综合

所属分类: TOEFL / IELTS

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