处女作 求拍

Indubitably, working makes an indispensable part of our lives, and even becomes the major part of some people’s lives.  Accordingly, choosing what kind of company to work for, say, a large one or a small one affects us a great deal . some people deem a small one as the premier choice , while others prefer to work for a large one , which is also my preferrence. I am in favor of the large company’s working atmosphere, the stability, and the opportunity to improve myself.

For one thing, small companies might be affected too much by only a small number of core figures who have a potent influencial power. Under such circumstances, there would be little chance for me to give full play of my capability. The same goes for other coworkers. After three or four months, the incentives of emplyees more than possible will vague. Quite the reverse, a large company can provide me with a more pleasant and competitive atmosphere, in which I can enjoy both the teamspirit and the right to promote my ideas. Take the google company as an example, I believe most people cannot imagine such a premium working envioronment in their wildest dreams.

Also, a large company have relatively less chance to shut down comparing to those small ones. As a result,the stability is another merit which the large companies draw my fantasy.  Large companies such as google, microsoft, and so forth  struggle not only for thousands of millions of dollars but also for the fame of the company. In contrast, small companies have to worry about their thin profits which sometimes could hardly make ends meet. In this fast changing business world,stability is of great significance element for us to take into account when hunting for jobs.

Last but not least,large companies will occasionally sent their workers to renewal their knowledge inventory in that they expect their employees being equiped with  knowledge in accordence with tomorrow’s development as well as that of today. In other words, big companies pose more attention on expasion. For instance,my father used to be in a small company,albeit he did quite well  in his bussiness and praised by his boss a geat deal,his company unfortunately go broke later on mostly resultting from a lack of applying for new technology.Now he works for a company enjoys somewhat reputation in China, his corporation invariably sent them to job training every one year or two. My father feel that he grown a lot from this job.it seems as he is paid for learning.

It can be concluded that working in a large company can benefit me much more than working in a small one. Why some people are in favor of working in small companies is always beyond me.

昨天发了德猪让我先改改 今天又发上来 希望好心人能帮我改

昨天发了德猪让我先改改 今天又发上来 希望好心人能帮我改

争取每天能写一篇

谢谢帮我改的XDJMS

争取每天能写一篇

谢谢帮我改的XDJMS

我的comments是:

1.

2段和4段你要写大的C可以给我更好的工作环境和更大的发展空间,你的example写的不够,有的不太和试. 在4段里,你可以写大的C可以把你送到国外training等等,,,

2.

3段你想写大的C比小的C更能在市场上生存,你的example写的不够好也不够详细. 

Indubitably, working makes (is becoming) an indispensable part of our lives, and even becomes the major part of some people’s lives.  Accordingly, choosing what kind of company to work for, say, a large one or a small one affects us a great deal. Some people
                deem a small one as the premier choice, while others prefer to work for a large one, which is also my preference. I am
                in favor of
                the large company’s working atmosphere, the stability, and the opportunity to improve myself. (I am eager to work for a world famous Fortune 500 company where I would gain more working experience and opportunities to improve myself)

For one thing, small companies might be affected too much by only a small number of core figures who have a potent influential power. Under (in) such circumstances, there would be little chance for me to give full play of my capability. The same goes for other coworkers. After three or four months, the incentives of emplyees more than possible will vague. Quite the reverse, a large company can provide me with a more pleasant and competitive atmosphere, in which I can enjoy both the teamspirit and the right to promote my ideas. Take the google company as an example, I believe most people cannot imagine such a premium working environment in their wildest dreams.

Also, a large company have relatively less chance to shut down comparing to those small ones.
            (A big company, comparing small company, is stronger enough to suffer from all kinds of operation risks.) As a result, the stability is another merit which the large companies draw my fantasy.  Large companies such as google, microsoft, and so forth  struggle not only for thousands of millions of dollars but also for the fame of the company. In contrast, small companies have to worry about their thin profits which sometimes could hardly make ends meet. In this fast changing business world,stability is of great significance element for us to take into account when hunting for (hunting) jobs.

Indubitably, working makes an indispensable part of our lives, and even becomes the major part of some people’s lives.  Accordingly, choosing what kind of company to work for, say, a large one or a small one, affects us a great deal. Some people deem a small one as the premier choice, while others prefer to work for a large one,(逗号这里不要) which is also my preference. I am in favor of the large company’s working atmosphere, the(the不要) stability, and the(the不要) opportunity(复数) to improve myself.

For one thing, small companies might be affected too much by only a small number of core figures who have a potent influencial power(这里最好把一些核心人物的强势表现出来，这样才可以使论证充分，比如：people in small companies are more likely to overrate those core figures’ capability and just go behind them without pondering. Consequently, they will, more or less, neglect some workers’ constructive ideas or proposals ). Therefore, Under such circumstances, there would be little chance for me to give full play of my capability. The same goes for other coworkers. After three or four months, the incentives of employees more than possible will vague. Quite the reverse, a large company can provide me with a more pleasant and competitive atmosphere, in which I can enjoy both the teamspirits and the right to promote my ideas.(这个句子之前最好添加一下原因：However, in large companies which run miscellaneous kinds of operations, few people can exert their influences in many ways. Therefore, every one can find his/her own position and have the right to have his/her opinion voiced. And fortunately, constructive opinions will not be ignored.) Take the google company as an example, I believe most people cannot imagine such a premium working envioronment in their wildest dreams. (这个例子貌似太宽泛了，你甚至没有说出google的兼容并包，例子就结束了。)

For another(和前面的for one thing对应), a large company have relatively less chance to shut down comparing to those small ones（这个句子太纠结了。改为：Compared with small companies, big ones are probably more stable<照应你的开头段> and have fewer chances to undergo bankrupts.）. As a result(记住，as a result不能乱用), the stability is another merit which the large companies draw my fantasy(这个句子貌似优点多余).  Large companies such as google, microsoft（这些名词的开头字母需要大写）, and so forth  struggle(这个词不好，大公司不struggle，你可以说strive) not only for thousands of millions of dollars but also for the fame of the company(这句的论证貌似该段没有关系，或者，论证得无力). In contrast, small companies have to worry about their thin profits which sometimes could hardly make ends meet. In this fast changing business world, stability is of(将of改成a) great significance element for us to take into account when hunting for jobs.

Last but not least, large companies will occasionally（为了表示大公司的好，这里应该用frequently） sent their workers to renewal their knowledge inventory in that they expect their employees being equiped with  knowledge in accordence with tomorrow’s development as well as that of today(你一些长句，给人的感觉就是比价殴打纠结，这里可以改为：To such two reasons, another must be added. Large companies frequently send their staff back to universities/colleges to renewal their knowledge and expertise in the hope of keeping the staff’s quality in a high level so that they can remain leading positions in their fields. ). In other words, big companies pose more attention on expasion. For instance, my father used to be in a small company, albeit he did quite well  in his business and praised by his boss a geat deal, his company unfortunately go broke later on mostly
                    resulting from a lack of applying for new technology(directly triggered by a lack of new technologies). Now he works for a company enjoys somewhat reputation in China, his corporation invariably sent them to job training every one year or two. My father feel that he grown a lot from this job.it seems as he is paid for learning. (你这段有好多拼写错误。其实，2个论点，论证充分就可以了。不一定非要3个的。)

It can be concluded that working in a large company can benefit me much more than working in a small one. Why some people are in favor of working in small companies is always beyond me.

 谢谢alexwithibt和德猪 你们的批改和建议都让我受益匪浅

我会认真研读的

争取进步

有个问题问德猪as a result为什么不能乱用啊？

看来我最大的问题应该是出在举例论述方面

真不知道怎么样才能加强这方面哦

那你是CD高人

同时还是hc常客了?

HC上有人把 德克的猪 这个名字抢注册了。

我在篮球上，至少在评论上的水平还是很高的。