[求助]刚才练了一个小作文，请大家给点意见，应该如何提高

是DELTA上的，第407页那题

开始还觉得写得满顺的，把听到的都堆上去。结果对了答案那个key points后，才发现自己逻辑混乱，真是吓得一身冷汗

请大家看看这样大概有几分，另外又没有有好的快速提高的方法~~

谢谢啦~~

Quiz 1

Summarize the points made in the talk, explaining how they cast doubt on points made in the reading.

In this lecture, the professor talks about experiments on some animals' behavior. He says that evidence from those experiments, “mark test” in particular, cannot prove the fact mentioned in the reading that some animals such as chimpanzees have concepts of self and can recognize their own images.

First, self-awareness does not equal to self-recognition. The professor points out that the "mark test" is repeated on other animals, but it is not always successful. Also, researches have already proved that only higher mental animals, including human beings and apes, have the ability of self-recognition. The reason why chimpanzees touched the marked spots more in front of the mirror, as mentioned in the reading, is chimpanzees behave routinely. They will frequently touch their head and face. This directly contradicts what the reading supports.

Second, the professor figures out another possibility to interpret the result of "mark test". That is, the particular behavior of chimpanzees in front of the mirror is just a sort of social response. In other words, they behave like that because of the presence of other animals. The professor uses an experiment on moneys to support his opinion. He says monkeys will groom themselves a lot when they realize other monkeys are stay around. This is another point that differs from the reading. Also, the professor concludes that today it is still hard to tell from experiments that whether certain behaviors of some animals are kind of self-awareness and self-recognition, or they are merely sort of social reaction and social response.

对照答案

Key points:

Scientists have always had a problem coming up with a reasonable definition of self-awareness; this contradicts the point in the reading that self-awareness is the same as self-recognition.

Further use of the mark test with chimpanzees produced results that were inconsistent; this contradicts the point in the reading that the chimpanzees on average touched the marked spots seven times in a half-hour.

All chimpanzees touch their heads and faces a lot; this contradicts the point in the reading that the chimpanzees touched the marked spots more often when the mirror was present.

Some of the behaviors we call self-aware are also social responses that chimpanzees show in the presence of another chimpanzee; this contradicts the point in the reading that chimpanzees are self-aware because they are able to recognize the image in the mirror as their own.