AI008第一篇限时issue请批评指正－Zeros修改标题， 见谅

The issue whether to change the entire current monetary system to a system of electronic accounts of credits and debits is complex and controversial. Some people like the speaker strongly recommend replacing the tangible system with a digital one as the technology develops. However, in my opinion, to replace the current monetary system with a digital one especially entirely is not feasible. I will illustrate my point of view by the following analysis.

   In the first place, an entirely digital monetary system is not safe compared with its counterpart. No matter how developed the technology is, there are still some flaws that can be taken advantages of by the hackers. And not only those hackers, it will also be more available for the inside technicians to corrupt, because they design the system or are in charge of the system thus are familiar with the defect of the system. Since the monetary system is life-and-death to a nation, we should not take the risk to replace the entire system to a digital one.

   Secondly, the direct result of the replacement of the monetary system is that the public have to use digital currency to exchange in their daily life but so far the technology has not developed to serve all the people all around the world to exchange using digital currency rather than its predecessor and it is evident that in the near future that is still impossible. Even if the global citizens all have access to use digital currency to exchange, troubles still exist. The designers of the monetary system have to either make it very simple but easy to be attacked to make all users   to use it without trouble or make it very sophisticated in case of hostile attack but only a few elites know how to use it.

   Admittedly, there is no denying that compared with the tangible currency the digital replacement is very convenient and cost-saving. But after weighing the pros and cons, I think the disadvantages to replace the entire system offset the advantages.

  Consequently, I advocate that the international community should not replace the current monetary system to a digital one, because: 1) it is easier to be attacked by hackers to use an entirely digital monetary system; 2) how to make the public accept the digital system is still an unsolved problem. Due to the above-mentioned reasons, which sometimes intertwine to make an organic whole and thus become more persuasive, we may safely arrive at the conclusion I support.

第一篇限时的issue，贴到word里面改了几个拼写。其他原封不动。还请各位大侠不吝赐教。什么地方写地不好，应该怎么改正，怎么在以后的作文复习里面注意这些问题？非常感谢！

HOHO, 您写得不错啊

暂时挑不出毛病。。。。

Consequently, I advocate that the international community should 这个好像是多于了not replace the current monetary system to a digital one, because: 1) it is easier to be attacked by hackers to use an entirely digital monetary system; 2) how to make the public accept the digital system is still an unsolved problem. Due to the above-mentioned reasons, which sometimes intertwine to make an organic whole and thus become more persuasive, we may safely arrive at the conclusion I support.

这个是结论段落么？

是结论段落呀。

谢谢大家点评！