TWE166请大家帮忙修改

When it comes to the issue as to what make a person an adult? people are likely to provide varying response . As far as I am concerned, I  firmly believe that universities, living by ourselves and jobs make a person an adult. In this essay , I will justify my reasons through details .

The most important reason for my view is that when we study in the universities , we need to prepare for our job career. Many universities have co-op programs which are very helpful  to the career development of people. And in the universities a lot of students have part-time job to make money for their tuition fee which is a common phenomenon in the universities . universities are not only give us a chance to improve our knowledge but also give us a opportunity to prepare our future. Therefore universities make a person an adult.

The second reason for my view is that when we are adults we will leave our parents this means we need to live by ourselves. When we live by ourselves we have to take care ourselves and make money by ourselves to purchase the goods which are needed in the daily life. When we live by ourselves we need to solve all the problems by ourselves which we do not worry about when we live with our parents. For instance, when I live with my parents they cook for me, wash clothes for me and did everything for me . I need to do all the things by myself now, but I am very proud because I am an adult when I live my parents.

The third reason for my view is that when we have a job we can help ourselves in the economy, which is phenomenon of an adult. A job also can enhance our personal skills which are necessary in the society.  Some jobs need us to finish them as a group, thorough these jobs we can better enjoy our interpersonal  skills and adept the society easier. Thus jobs make an impact on adults.

In summary, as suggested by the previous reasons I believe that universities, living by ourselves and jobs make a person an adult.

看到这个题目偶没有一点头绪,所以文章写得有点幼稚,请大家指出错误和给出好的建议最好能再给个分数,谢谢大家了.

偶不是nn，帮你改改。偶也觉得这篇好难。

When it comes to the issue as to （不必要）what make a person an adult?  ，people are likely to provide varying response （a variety of responses）. As far as I am concerned, I  firmly believe that universities, living by ourselves (life in universities by ourselves)and jobs make a person an adult. In this essay , I will justify my reasons through details .

The most important reason for my view is that when we study in the universities , we need to prepare for our job career. Many universities have co-op programs which are very helpful  to (for ) the career development of people. And in the universities a lot of students have part-time job to make money for their tuition fee which is a common phenomenon in the universities . (The experience in)universities are not only give us a chance to improve our knowledge but also give us a opportunity to prepare (for )our future. Therefore universities make a person an adult.

The second reason for my view is that when we are adults, we will leave our parents this (, which)means we need to live by ourselves. When we live by ourselves we have to take care ourselves and make money by ourselves to purchase the goods which are needed in the daily life. When we live by ourselves we need to solve all the problems by ourselves which we do not worry about when we live with our parents. For instance, when I live with my parents they cook for me, wash clothes for me and did (do)everything for me . I need to do all the things by myself now, but I am very proud because I am an adult when I live (without the accompany by)my parents.

The third reason for my view is that when we have a job we can help (depend on)ourselves in the economy, which is phenomenon (a symbol)of an adult. A job also can enhance our personal skills which are necessary in the society.  Some jobs need us to finish them as a group, thorough these jobs we can better enjoy our interpersonal  skills and adept the society easier. Thus jobs make an impact on adults.

In summary, as suggested by the previous reasons I believe that universities, living by ourselves and jobs make a person an adult.

以上只是我得想法。我也写了一篇，请高人和牛牛批改，不胜感激。

As children, we are eager to be mature and be adults at an earlier age. When it comes to the issue what events make me an adult, I will point out finding the first job and getting married are the most essential events for me. Some others will have their opinions on the question, depending on their own experience and life styles. Among numerous factors which indicate my viewpoint, I will explore only a couple of conspicuous ones here.

First of all, the primary cause for my inclination is that earning money and supporting myself is a milestone in my life. When we are little kids, we do not think about the term "responsibility" too much. On the contrary, when we work for a company or an institution, the responsibility seems to be the top priority. We will consider the benefits of our companies first and also balance the relationships among the bosses, colleagues and clients. In my opinion there are no better examples than this one to demonstrate my standpoint suitably and clearly.

In the second place, another persuasive reason should be stressed is that marriage is also an important event to urge us to be an adult. Here a concrete example can be presented. After being one party of a couple, we should think about the feeling of the other party. When we have some children, we are supposed to take the burden to raise them and teach them the basic abilities for living.

Admittedly, it is necessary to take a glance at the argument of the other side. Some other events also make us from innocence to maturity. We learn the rules of treating others kindly, choosing the real friends and taking care of the old from books and from our own experience. However, these donot weaken what I advocated and not overwhelm the significance that I stated. When the advantages of all views are compared carefully, the most striking fact is obvious.

In summary, based on what has been discussed above, the advantages of being independent and being a wife/husband carry more weight than other events throughout our whole lifetime. As a result, taking into account of all facts, we undoubtedly come to the conclusion depending on yourself and getting married are the most crucial turning point for a person who become an adult.