19 号就要考试了，大神帮帮我！！

leilei34

19号就要考试了，作文心里很没底，各位大神前辈帮忙看看吧，挑挑毛病，跪谢了！！！

41 The following appeared in a health newsletter.

"A tenyear nationwide study of the effectiveness of wearing a helmet while bicycling indicates that ten years ago, approximately 35 percent of all bicyclists reported wearing helmets, whereas today that number is nearly 80 percent. Another study, however, suggests that during the same ten-year period, the number of bicycle-related accidents has increased 200 percent. These results demonstrate that bicyclists feel safer because they are wearing helmets, and they take more risks as a result. Thus, to reduce the number of serious injuries from bicycle accidents, the government should concentrate more on educating people about bicycle safety and less on encouraging or requiring bicyclists to wear helmets."

Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.

In this newsletter he author reasons that in order to reduce the serious injuries from bicycle incidents , the government are required to educate people about bicycle safety and not to require people to wear helmets. To support his view , he cite the comparison between the percentage of people who wear helmets of ten years ago and now. Also he notes that in another study the number of the of the bicycle-related accidents increased 200 percent, and explain the reason by supposing that the guard of helmet make people take more risk. However , these evidence lends little credible support for the argument.

First of all , there are some doubts about the study of the effectiveness of wearing a helmet. The author did not mention any details about the study, so we are not sure about the authority of study. These two investigation may choose different people, and the specific way how the survey was conducted has not been mentioned . All these difference can make the comparison between these two survey invalid.What’s more the rise in the percentage of people who wear helmets does not amplify the number of people who wear helmets. With the development in economy and transportation , the number of people who ride bicycles may decline a lot , therefore , there may be less people wearing helmets. So we should collect more information from the study .

Careful examination is also required in another study of the bicycle-related accidents. There is indeed an obvious rise in the number of bicycle-related accidents, but the reason of these accidents and who should take more responsibility in these accidents are not sure yet. Maybe most of the accidents result from the car drivers’ carelessness rather than the bicyclists’ fault. And even most of the accidents are bicyclists’ fault , it maybe not the helmets’ fault. Various reasons are possible , like not familiar with the traffic regulations, not good at riding bicycles , and carelessness.

At end , the author suggested the government should concentrate more on educating people about bicycle safety to reduce the number of serious injuries from bicycle accidents. This suggestion sounds reasonable , but once it is put into action , this seems a little bit impractical. The preparation of money and the stuff needed in this program really is a tough problem, for example the budge of government may be limited. Even though the former are fulfilled, the final effect of the program will really satisfy our expectation? I think more ways to prompt people’s awareness in bicycle should be come up with, and some easier and more effective ways might be found.

In sum, the editorial's author cannot justify his or her voting recommendation on the basis of the scant evidence provided in the editorial. To bolster the recommendation the author must provide better evidence that the relationship between the helmet and bicycle-related accidents. And he need to gater more information form those two study and make some investigation to support his speculation.

getencore

卧槽。。。19号考的就是这篇。。。你怎么做到的。。。。

leilei34

getencore 发表于 2014-2-3 21:44
卧槽。。。19号考的就是这篇。。。你怎么做到的。。。。

我这次作文竟然2.5，上次还是3。。。要三战的节奏了