Lexi 作文作业贴~求指导

暴风雨小圆

我的911独立在主贴的34页，麻烦了哦！
Again, I‘m so sorry for being late for revising so long because of my carelessness!

苦大仇深的Lexi

好久没写独立憋了半天才写好...
求同学狠批啦

jirou1212

10/8獨立寫作批改

University is a place where students can have high education, gain professional knowledge and build virtual outlook on life. Needless to say, it is very significant to everyone's future development. Recently, some educators suggest that if university add more courses for students would help better preparing for their future career. I definitely agree with such a suggestion.

To begin with, companies nowadays are getting picker when recruiting. They expect all of the graduates can be some sort of T type talents, people not only specialized in one aspect, but also have pluralistic abilities. To fulfill this demand, university should offer students wide range of courses to broaden their knowledge and horizon. Take my own experience as an example. Every time i tell somebody that my major is material science and engineering, he or she will say 'Oh, you must deal with plenty of chemical stuffs'. Absolutely yes, yet it is not the whole stories. Besides various chemistry courses, we have other courses both science and liberal such as computer programming, electrotechnics and world history. All these courses give us chances to know more about our world, solve emergency problems out of our profession field and make us to fit in as many positions as possible.

What's more, knowledge itself is not enough when someone pursuing a good career, because knowledges from textbooks are mostly out of date, or have authentic usage at work. To solve this situation, many universities take positive actions by holding some technological innovation projects. Fortunately, I succeeded to apply for a project, aiming to develop a solid film for copper ion detection in marine environment. At first, I had a really hard time doing it, searching for scarce information, reading thousands of pagers manual of equipments and devising experimental procedure. Now, I mastered almost all equipments in the laboratory and can do experiments independently. Thanks to this experience, I got an internship in a famous chemical company.

Another equally important aspect is that many undergraduates are afraid of participating into work field because of the large work pressure and limited occupations. If universities can provide some courses such as career planning and psychological guidance, students would be more confident and less fearful when hunting for a job. As a precise data shows, 40 percent of students are more willing to take part in jobs after taking psychological guidance. They are more clearly with what they want to do and what they have to do. From my perspective, mock interview is another important course which should be taken into consideration. Through the course, students will be able to know how to dress themselves tidily, how to perform formally, how to answer interviewers' questions properly and how to express their ideas clearly to interviewers.

With all the aspects carefully taken into consideration,I strongly suggest that university should offer more courses to prepare students for the future. In this way, students can have advanced position in the future job market and will bring more profits to companies they work at. It would be a win-win situation, isn't it?





後來改的都無法標上紅色了
煩請大大核對一下
抱歉
首次批改
只是個人意見僅供參考
很棒的文章 相信在考試上很能把握分數

jirou1212

Both the reading and the speech discuss whether the woman portrait attributed to Rembrandt. The former believes that the portrait was not draw by Rembrandt because some specious problems with the portrait such as the inconsistency in cloth, the unfitness of the light and shadow and the wood panel whereas the latter casts doubt on such a belief.

To begin with, the reading passage holds that the woman wears a servant cap however with a luxurious fur collar she could not afford. Rembrandt was a man who pursued details on clothing in his painting,  he could not make such mistake. Nevertheless, the lecture maintains that the fur collar was not a part of the original painting. Someone who wanted to sell the painting added the fur collar over the top of the original portrait to make the price higher, to pretend the woman in the picture were some sort of a royal lady.

Moreover, the article posits that Rembrandt was good at painting light and shadow. The incorrect illuminated face could not attribute to Rembrandt. In contrast, the lecturer demonstrates deep opposition to such a claim, by stating that in the original painting the woman was in a simple light color cloth which reflected lights. Instead of being absorbed, lights illuminate on the woman's face.

At last but not least, the wood panel glued like such way was not the common material used by Rembrandt according to the passage. Conversely, as the speaker affirms, some merchants disguise the painting to be grand and expensive. They glued plenty of the extra wood pieces on the panel. After examining, experts found that the original panel was a single piece of wood.Moreover, that piece of wood form of ''portrait of an woman'' is exactly from the same three as the wood panel of Rembrandt's another painting"self portrait". Thus the painting was definitely draw by Rembrandt.

好多細節大大都掌握了
文章又很完整
非常之厲害
我這樣改簡直雞蛋裡挑骨頭

苦大仇深的Lexi

jirou1212 发表于 2013-10-9 21:04
Both the reading and the speech discuss whether the woman portrait attributed to Rembrandt. The for ...

谢谢批改~
最后那个from the same tree 我听是听到了...写着写着就给忘了~

苦大仇深的Lexi

10.09独立
Agree or disagree: Your job has greater happiness than your social life.

In modern society, we take it for granted that everyone needs a job which becomes an indivisible part of life.As we all know, we cannot make a live without money and the only way to earn money is working.But does it bring us happiness? I seriously doubt it. Instead, i am more willing to believe that social life and communication is the source of happiness.

The first thing i want to mention is that job is everything but happiness. Job can make us wealth; job can give us status and reputation; job can give us more authority; but job also brings more burden and pressure. Take a glance of my father who was a moderate and gentle person. More and more innovation programs, experiments and work task push him to be a heavy smoker. No matter how many times me and my mother persuade him to get rid of cigarettes does not him make any action. What's more, his health condition is from bad to worse, coughing all the time. Job gives my dad a problematic lung instead of a positive impact.

On the other side, social life is a comfort for rapid living speed. Whenever i feel upset and overwhelmed, i will call my friends to hang out, maybe just going to the cafe, sitting whole afternoon, chatting about the news happened beside me or having a cup of coffee to refresh myself. The time i spend with my friends is almost the happiest time in my memory. During that time, i not only release my own pressure but also i learn to hear other people. Once my friend Jesscia was frustrated by the failure in her final exam. I comforted her and gave her reference all i can. Finally, I saw beautiful smile reappeared on her face and somehow our friendship was enhanced.

Furthermore, social life has a magic power to bring someone important into your life as a wonderful boyfriend or girlfriend, a prominent skiing partner or a prominent model.For me, social life introduce the most significant teacher,my dance teacher who I met in a holiday class into my life.She is a kind mid aged woman spending nearly every minute on education. Every time I have dancing problems she will show right gesture to me patiently. Moreover,she is far more than a teacher but a parent. Sometimes after class, she let me stay and have dinner with her family, treating me like her own child. Thanks to the holiday class, I have a second brilliant ‘mother’.

With all the aspects carefully taken into consideration, don’t you think social life is the origin of pleasure?Try to meet more people, make more friends and participate in sports game. Thus, you will find that despite dull jobs life is full of colorful events and fantastic surprise.

苦大仇深的Lexi

10.9 综合TPO4


Both the reading and the speech discuss whether dinosaurs were endotherms. The former believes that they were due to polar species, underneath leg position and haversian canals in bones whereas the latter casts doubt on such a belief.

To begin with, the reading passage holds that only endotherms can live in extreme cold weather. Thus the exsist of polar dinosaurs proves that they were endotherms. Nevertheless, the lecture maintains that polar area was much warmer than nowadays for animals not endotherms to survive and that even if the condition was really cold, dinosaurs could move to a warmer place or hibernate which proves dinosaurs were not endotherms.

What's more, the article posits that underneath leg makes running efficient which is a sign of endotherms. In contrast, the lecturer demonstrates deep opposition to such a claim, by stating that the position of leg did not  provide energy for running, but supported more weight as the body grew much larger. Being larger was an advantage for dinosaurs to survive.

Finally, the author lists that the haversian canals found in dinosaurs' bones is another strong evidence. Conversely, as the speaker affirms, dinosaurs do have haversian canals but they also have growth ring which indicates that dinosaurs did not grow rapidly and consitently.In some cooler condition, they stopped growing or grew slowly which is definitly a characteristic of animals that are not endotherms.

jirou1212

批改的  10.09独立
Agree or disagree: Your job has greater happiness than your social life.

In modern society, we take it for granted that everyone needs a job which becomes an indivisible part of life.As we all know, we cannot make a live without money and the only way to earn money is working. But does it bring us happiness? I seriously doubt it. Instead, I am more willing to believe that social life and communication is the source of happiness.

The first thing I want to mention is that job is everything but happiness. Job can make us wealth; job can give us status and reputation; job can give us more authority; but job also brings us more burden and pressure. Take a glance of my father who was a moderate and gentle person. Loads of innovation programs, experiments and work task push him became a heavy smoker. No matter how many times my mother and I persuade him to get rid of the addiction on cigarettes does not make any action. What's more, his health condition is getting worse; he is coughing all the time. Therefore job caused health issues  instead of bringing a positive impact on my dad.

On the other side, social life is a comfort for rapid living path. Whenever I feel upset and overwhelming, I will call my friends to hang out, maybe just going to the cafe, sitting for a whole afternoon, chatting about the news happened around me or having a cup of coffee to refresh myself. The time I spend with my friends is almost the happiest moment in my memory. During the time, not only my pressures released, but I also learn to listen to other people. Once my friend Jesscia was frustrated by the failure in her final exam. I comforted her and gave her reference all I can. Finally, I saw beautiful smile reappeared on her face and somehow our friendship was enhanced.

Furthermore, social life has a magic power to bring someone important into your life such as a wonderful boyfriend or girlfriend, a prominent skiing partner or a prominent model.For me, social life introduced the most significant teacher,my dance teacher who I met in a holiday class into my life. She is a kindhearted mid-age woman spending nearly every minute of her life on education. Every time I have dancing problems, she always willing to demonstrate the right gesture to me patiently. Moreover,she is far more than a teacher but a parent. Sometimes after class hour, she would invite me to stay and have dinner with her family, treating me like her own child. Thanks to the holiday class, I have a second brilliant ‘mother’.

With all the aspects carefully taken into consideration, don’t you think social life is the origin of pleasure? Try to meet more people, make more friends and participate in sports game,etc. Thus, you will find that despite dull jobs life is full of colorful events and fantastic surprise.

加了許多自己的意見：Ｐ
大大寫得很完整舉例都很真實豐富
我要加強我的實力“實例”了

jirou1212

批改的
10.9 综合TPO4


Both the reading and the speech discuss whether dinosaurs were endotherms. The former believes that they were due to polar species, underneath leg position and haversian canals in bones whereas the latter casts doubt on such a belief.

To begin with, the reading passage holds that only endotherms can live in extreme cold weather. Thus the existence of polar dinosaurs proves that they were endotherms. Nevertheless, the lecture maintains(mentions 不清楚你是要用這個字嗎？) that polar area was much warmer than nowadays for animals not endotherms to survive. And then, even if the condition was really cold, dinosaurs could move to a warmer place or hibernate which proves dinosaurs were not endotherms.

What's more, the article posits that underneath leg makes running efficient which is a sign of endotherms. In contrast, the lecturer demonstrates deep opposition to such a claim, by stating that the position of leg did not  provide energy for running, but supported more weight as the body grew much larger. Being larger was an advantage for dinosaurs to survive.(這句很順順暢耶我在寫的時候就是在思索這個部分)

Finally, the author lists that the haversian canals found in dinosaurs' bones is another strong evidence. Conversely, as the speaker affirms, dinosaurs do have haversian canals but they also have growth ring which indicates that dinosaurs did not grow rapidly and consitently. In some cooler condition, they stopped growing or grew slowly which is definitly a characteristic of animals that are not endotherms.

結尾好有力
我總是寫到最後就不了了之了
太棒了給你鼓勵鼓勵

苦大仇深的Lexi

10.10独立Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? It is not necessary for university students to attend classes as long as they can pass their examinations.


Many elements in modern society such as wealth, reputation, status and authority make people fans of utilitarianism. This worldwide trend also influences many university students who by all means to get high scores and ignore basic morality. Can you imagine that in a lecture hall for one hundred students to have lesson only half of the seats are taken? What a disrespect to professors! As for me, i strongly recommend that even if students get high scores should they take part in the whole curriculum.

First thing i intend to mention is mutual respect. Professors in front of the platform not only give us lectures to fulfill his or her education schedule but also, from deep inside their hearts, expect us to absorb useful knowledge. The best thing to thanks for their hardworking is the serious and upright attitudes toward their lessons. It reminds me of a young teacher in my university who is about my age. The class she teaches is engineering english which contains plenty of difficult vocabulary. The lack of educational experience makes her class a little bit boring. As a result, more and more students decide to learn it by themselves. Once there were only ten people in the classroom, a strong shock that the young girl could barely afford. She cried and started to doubt her career. It is too cruel to a person who just started her job.

Moreover, the context on test papers will never cover whole knowledge, demonstrated by professor during the class. Students who only care about the score will definitely miss some fantastic parts of their university. Take a glance to my flavourite teacher, Chinese history teacher, who is a humorous and handsome man. On his class, he never talk too much about what is printed on the textbook, instead he usually tell vivid stories to make us understand history events more easily and thoroughly. What's more, he will bring some interesting staff to the classroom such as the out-of-print coins of his family which passed from generation to generation. It is really fortunate that i can see the precious coins with my own eyes.

In addition, absence from classes gives students less opportunities to meet different people and make more friends. Social life plays a very important role in university life. It is common to see that many extremely outstanding students do almost everything by themselves, having a meal, doing exercise and going to library which is not because the people surround them dislike them but because people do not know them. They seldom appear on the classroom. Even their classmates cannot recognize them on the way to school. Friends are essential for everyone right? Can high scores release your feel of loneliness and give you happiness?

With all the aspects carefully taken into consideration, why not attending your classes? Do not treat it as some duty or responsibilities. Treat it as enjoyment and communication. So called professors can give you knowledge more than you can imagine.