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[作文互改] ARUMENT113 求批改

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发表于 2013-8-12 17:55:16 | 只看该作者 回帖奖励 |倒序浏览 |阅读模式
113(同老G180)
Argu原文
The following is a recommendation from the personnel director to the
president of Acme Publishing Company.

“Many other companies have recently stated that having their employees
take the Easy Read Speed-Reading Course has greatly improved
productivity. One graduate of the course was able to read a 500-page
report in only two hours; another graduate rose from an assistant manager
to vice president of the company in under a year. Obviously, the faster
you can read, the more information you can absorb in a single workday.
Moreover, Easy Read would cost Acme only $500 per employee—a small
price to pay when you consider the benefits. Included in this fee is a
three-week seminar in Spruce City and a lifelong subscription to the Easy
Read newsletter. Clearly, to improve productivity, Acme should require
all of our employees to take the Easy Read course.

“Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be
answered in order to decide whether the advice and the argument on
which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to
these questions would help to evaluate the advice.”;
写作如下:
This argument seems reasonable at first glance. However, the claim that Acme should require all of  employees to take the Easy Read course in order to improve productivity is invalid if the director could not answer certain important questions.

A threshold problem of this argument involves the statements of other companies. We may ask if the statements of other companies are authentic? It is possible that the Easy Read Speed-Reading Course was not so successful, however, these companies didn't tell the truth to the personnel director for certain unknown reasons. Without ruling out this possibility, the director's claim that this course can help these companies improve productivities is invalid.

In addition, we may also ask if the successof the two graduates of is caused by the course? It is possible that their outstanding behaviors resulted from their own efforts rather than the course. Even if the two graduates' success was caused by the course, we are not sure if they can be representative of all the employees in these companies. Perhaps other employees couldn’t improve a lot .Without considering about these problems, the personnel director's claim is open to doubt.

Even if the course actually helped these companies improve their employees’ behaviors, we still need to ask if Acme Publishing Company and these companies are comparable. The course may not besuccessful in Acme if Acme is different from these companies in many aspects, such as marketing strategy, management methods, employees' abilities...Without answering this question, the director could not convince me about his claim.

Moreover, granted that Acme is parallel to these companies, the director also unfairly assumes that the faster a person reads, the more information can be absorbed. Yet, it is entirely possible that many details may be misunderstood or ignored as a person's reading speed increases. Without ruling out this negative effect of fast reading, the director's recommendation that employees of Acme should also take this course may be untenable.

Finally, we are not sure if the course will actually bring benefits to Acme. Even if it will, the director could not provide any evidence to prove that the benefits will outweigh the pay: perhaps, although the personal cost is not a big number, the total pay is large when the number of employees is also huge, while the benefits are insignificant, then the course is still not worth conducted.

In conclusion, this argument is unpersuasive and the personnel director should prove that the course is actually successful in many other companies and also will work in Acme. In addition, he should also verify that this course will bring benefits outweigh the total cost. Otherwise, he could not convince me about his recommendation.

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沙发
发表于 2013-8-13 11:19:58 | 只看该作者
这样写挺清晰的,我觉得不错
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