求各位大神指点和批改这篇 2012.5.5NA

1023028621

2012.5.5NA

Which do you think is the best way for a student to make friends: joining a sports team participating in community activities, or traveling? Use specific examples to support your answer
Friendships is an important aspect of life at all stages , particularly for more and more young people. Thus , nowadays , it is a vital issue that given a choice :joining a sports team, participating community activities or traveling,which is best way for a student to make friends . I’ d say the best way to make friend is joining a sports team . I hereby will illustrate several reasons to support my perspective.

Firstly ,by joining a sport team , one is sure provides with more opportunity to meet a broad range of people who share similar interests and practice skills . Definitely, we are might meet dozens of new people, many of whom could be potential friends. In order to develop friendships , we must have regular contact with each other and sport teams generally meet several times a week, thereby giving people opportunities to get to know each others.
Secondly, when teams get together to practive , all the members will have a common a goal to fight for , in order to achieves the goal, the members must learn to cooperate with each other. Otherwise, the team will not a successful team . Cooperation skills are vitally important when playing on a team , and they are equally important when developing friendships. Friends who not learn to cooperate with each other will not remain long times. Moreover , the member of kicking the ball is forever the classic moment , especially we are win the game . The witness that Simile and tears run down the faces not only tne success of the game , but also the solid friendship which will probably develop long-lasting friendship.Therefore , by joining a sport team , people will practive and develop skills.

In addition, are not there some possible of developing friendship? Of course yes, we can make friends who will with them to solve some problems by participating community activities. Also , we can make friends who will with them to share happiness by traveling. But , I concede that making friends by joining sports team are quickly and effective. One can meet many new people , have regular contact with them ,and develop the kinds positive and constructive relationships that come from working together and accomplishing a common goal. In doing so , one has the potential to make lasting friendships that will be of great value throughout life.

From all examples , analysis above , we can infer that by joining sports team is the most choice.

1023028621

自己顶顶了...各位提点意见吧，我刚开始作文，语法一窍不通...