[求助]我的一些问题（附TWE004作分析），请牛牛帮忙！

superdaisy

It has been said,"Not everything that is learned is contained in books."Compare and contrast knowledge gained from experience with knowledge gained from books.In your opinnion,which souce is more important?Why?

   As we all know,our knowledge is usually gained from two ways:experience and books. However,I don't think the two sources are of the same importance for us.Experience is much more important than books,in my opinion.

   One of the reason in that knowledge gained from books is also gained from experience . Actually,the aim of the creation of books is to pass experience from generation to generation . No experience,no books.

    And we may find useful knowledge in our action,which never exists in books.Just taking the enrollment of MBA into consideration,which acquires 3-year's experience at least,we could easily  konw that a lot of things necessary to us cannot be learned from books.

    Something is known like this:a man who cannot read a book might lead a happy life, while a man without any experience is  even not able to make himself alive in this world.So it is apparent to catch my point.

    There are still many reasons to support why experience is superior to books in learning,but all vital points have already been listed here,I believe.Futhermore,putting both experience and books in proper places, we could gain knowledge more efficiently.

我的目标是4.5分以上，请问这种样子的文章能达到要求了么？

关于字数，我写得太慢了，这个月就要考试，所以估计最多就能写这么多了，不知道会不会太少。

我的这篇文章没有套任何模版，可是感觉却有点模式化，不知道这种风格是不是符合要求的呢？

谢谢牛牛们帮忙批改陋文，请给我点建议好吗？

pengstone

楼主还需努力，几点看法：

1、用不用模板不重要，关键是要掌握ETS 所认可的论证结构，因此建议你还是多看看范文。

2、字数偏少，每一段的论述不充分。