第一二三只的作文帖~~求指导！！！

第一二三只

3.5 独立
In the bookstore, "How to Succeed by Relationships" and "How to Run Your Relationships" these kinds of book must be arranged in the center of book sheers. People also would rather draw more attention to how to run a well relationship with classmates, partners than studying hard at school. But I persist assiduous studying is much more useful.


On one hand, studying is one of students' obligations where people obtain knowledge and technology from. The more skills people master, the easier way to get career success. An ideal career needs knowledge which students achieve in hard learning is priceless that many managers’ lack and regretting not to value before. So, why not get the vital information at school? During my internship at a company, I felt strong that what I had mastered is fairly not enough. I barely knew anything about auditing, except a little accounting skill. I was upset and the manager comforted me of studying harder when back to school. That makes me hold an unshakable belief that students should learn hard at school.


On another, studying is a way to share happiness and bitterness with each other who they struggle with. It is an unforgettable and precious experience of being through the ups and downs in that period. Moreover, students have ability to making friends and get along well with other people, as long as it does not disrupt the normal life. What is more, people in campus are innocent instead of sophisticated. There are no worries to making bad friends. When people go to work, they will find out that only friendship in campus has no relationship with profits.


Admittedly, being related well to other people is a good approach to build a successful career. When in companies, they can take advantage of a large number of friends. A web of relationship always plays a significant role in promotion and contracts. However, as to students, poor score in studying will be considered as a man who is not motivated and has no ability.


Taking those into account, to achieve a promising future, hard learning is much reliable than GuanXi. Chances favor the minds that are prepared. No matter what kind of job we will do, knowledge and skills are ever and never fade away.

yomina

3.5 独立
In the（a） bookstore,  "How to Succeed by Relationships" and "How to Run Your Relationships" these kinds of book(these kinds of book such as "How to...") must be arranged in the center of book sheers(shelves). People also would rather draw more attention to how to run a well relationship with classmates, partners than studying hard at school. But I persist assiduous studying is much more useful.


On one hand, studying is one of students' obligations where people obtain knowledge and technology from. The more skills people master, the easier way to get career success(way 来get career success？). An ideal career needs knowledge which students achieve in hard learning is（两个谓语了~~~） priceless that many managers’ lack and regretting not to value before. So, why not get the vital information at school? During my internship at a company, I felt strong that what I had mastered is(was) fairly not enough. I barely knew anything about auditing, except a little accounting skill. I was upset and the manager comforted me of studying(to study) harder when back to school. That makes（made） me hold an unshakable belief that students should learn hard at school.(可以跟前面用which连起来~)


On another( the other hand), studying is a way to share happiness and bitterness with each other who(whom) they struggle with(感觉用struggle with 不太合适). It is an unforgettable and precious experience of（for us） being(to go) through the ups and downs in that period. Moreover, students have ability(abilities) to making(make) friends and get along well with other people, as long as it does not disrupt the normal life(这句话是想说学生时代更好交朋友吧？表达需要斟酌一下~). What is more（跟前面是一个意思，已经有moreover了就不要再what's more了）, people in campus are innocent instead of sophisticated. There are no worries to making（make） bad（最好解释一下在社会上气息比较严重的，bad说理太弱了） friends. When people go to work, they will find out that only friendship in campus has no relationship（concern） with profits.


Admittedly, being related well to other people is a good approach to build a successful career. When in companies, they can take advantage of a large number of friends. A web of relationship always plays a significant role in promotion and contracts. However, as to students, poor score in studying will be considered as a man who is not motivated and has no ability.


Taking those into account, to achieve a promising future, hard learning is much reliable than GuanXi（？？？）. Chances favor the minds that are prepared. No matter what kind of job we will（删） do, knowledge and skills are ever and never fade away.

说理还需要更有说服力一些，语法错误要注意~
还是有很多好词的，加油加油加油！

第一二三只

3.6 独立
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
It is better to relax by a movie or reading a book than doing physical exercise.
On contemporary society, an increasing number of people are in sub-health, suffering much pressure and various diseases. Some of them prefer watching films or reading a book to release tension. Some of them would like to do physical exercise, instead. As far as I am concerned, taking exercise is superior to other methods, though all of them can make people relaxing and leisurely, because of the long-term benefits.

At the beginning, physical exercise, as most people know, not only can strengthen physique and enhance immune function but also can drive bad mode away. Via exercises, it is very efficient to increase life span and decrease the stores of fat in the body. Recently, a research indicated that the physically active people live longer than their counterparts and benefit from a better quality of life. When in low mode or under severe stress, the body function will not behave well. If doing some exercises at the same time, which negative elements will disperse with sweat, the body can get to normal and the mode will turn to sunny as well.


Further, taking exercise can relief psychological and emotional stress and help people take their mind off problems. The body can release hormones that give us a light high. For instance, in the gym, we have a lot of chances to talk to strange people, making friends. We can share our hardness, pressure and even bitterness to some temporary friends who we have no need to worry about letting out secrets which can much reduce our difficulties. Sometimes, people in fitness center holding a total different opinion about our straits can offer us an unexpected solution of working out. Also, getting along with different people can distract attention on stress which would make people less suffering.


Admittedly, reading a book or seeing a movie give people own space to liberate negative feelings which is better than exercise. However, isolating from crowds may cause worse problems like depression than stress. Only letting pressure deeply in mind out, does people have possibility to be in health. Compared to knowledge, fitness probably plays a more important role.


Taking above all into consideration, taking physical exercise is a wiser choice for relaxing.

第一二三只

3.7 独立
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
It is more enjoyable to have a job and work long hours for three days in a week than to work shorter hours for five days in a week.

Nowadays, an increasing number of employees place considerable emphasis on prolong rest time by working long hours for three days a week rather than shorter hours for five days. However, as far as I am concerned, the original working pattern has more merits which is less stress on everyday, have enough time to take care of families and also could create more profit for companies than three-day working.



First of all, working shorter hours would not put employees into high pressure environment. Most people would feel exhausted when whole day working, not to mention for three days does. Even though there is four day to relax, the other three days' tension is out of physical endurance of a normal person, especially for women. Besides, if people work for three days, to maintain the business of the company, employees must condense their five-day task into three days, which means a double workload and stress. As people all know, high pressure would enhance the rate of depression and heart disease and keep them in sub-health.



In addition, a short working hour gives staffs more spare time to look after their family, like house cleaning and cooking, and strengthen the relationship. For human beings, there is a great necessity to bind their family bone by daily and trivial things such as talking with each other, helping them clean house, even washing dishes that all are the joint of love. Too much woke on three days would weaken that joint and prevent body do other consuming things. On the other hand, in terms of employees a four-day rest would wear working passion down. People have to adjust themselves into working style when they start to work. However, when just into working pattern, they can have a long relax. On the contrary, it is much more efficient when people work for five days, probably due to the stability.


Last but not the least, people work for five days can create greater wealth for companies and country than three day does. On contemporary society, most countries adopt the eight-hour day working system. If condense the equal jobs into three days, staffs must do more than ten hours a day which is obviously impossible. So the companies have to shorten hours which will decrease the profits and hinder economic development.

Taking above all into account, working shorter hours for five days in a week is better than three days.

Tancyfox

Nowadays, an increasing number of employeesplace considerable emphasis on prolong rest time by working long hours forthree days a week rather than shorter hours for five days. However, as far as Iam concerned, the original working pattern has more merits which isare less stress on every day,(是不是应该多加几个优点在这) have （主语应该是workingpattern吧）enough time to take care of families and also could create moreprofit for companies than three-day working.

First of all, working shorter hours wouldnot put employees into high pressure environment. Most people would feelexhausted when whole day working这个表达上可以改一下,not to mention for three days does. Even though there is four day+s to relax, the other three days' tension is out ofphysical endurance of a normal person, especially for women. Besides, if peoplework for three days, to maintain the business of the company, employees mustcondense their five-day task into three days, which means a double workload andstress. As people all know, high pressure would enhance the rate of depressionand heart disease and keep them in sub-health.

In addition, a short working hour givesstaffs more spare time to look after their family, like house cleaning andcooking, and strengthen the relationship. For human beings, there is a greatnecessity to bind their family bone by daily and trivial things such as talkingwith each other, helping them cleaning house, even washing dishes（两个是并列关系，应该是平行结构） that all are the joint of love.( Too muchwoke on three days would weaken that joint and prevent body do other consumingthings这句话表述有点奇怪，再时态有点问题). On the other hand, in terms of employees a four-day rest wouldwear working passion down. People have to adjust themselves into working stylewhen they start to work. However, when just into working pattern（Work enthusiasm感觉见到的多一点）, they can have a long relax. Onthe contrary, it is much more efficient when people work for five days,probably due to the stability.

Last but not the least, (改为last but not least) people work forfive days can create greater wealth for companies and country than three daydoes. On contemporary society, most countries adopt the eight-hour day workingsystem. If condense这个词蛮少用的 the equal jobsinto three days, staffs must do more than ten hours a day which is obviouslyimpossible.（这句语法上有点看不清） So the companies have toshorten hours which will decrease the profits and hinder economic development.

Taking above all into account, workingshorter hours for five days in a week is better than three days.
文章用了很多固定搭配，学术词汇用的比较恰当，连接词用的很多样话所以层次蛮清晰的，语法上有一丢丢小缺憾但应该是可以很快就克服的~可适当增加几条从句，表达上更加多样化一些~                

第一二三只

3.10 独立
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Most people often let others make decisions for them rather than
make decisions by themselves.

Do you choose your clothes by yourself or your parents? Do you make friends by yourself or others? Do you make business affairs by yourself or other people? I believe most people make above decisions by themselves not others. Although an advantage of letting others make decisions for them is saving time and energy, making their own decisions is far happier and more compatible. The merits of deciding by themselves out weight others do.


To begin with, decisions made by themselves reflect their true needs, because no one knows others well except themselves. Put a very simple instance, when we go to shopping with friends, it is obvious that we have to choose ideal clothes. But the problem is that which one we choose: the one we like or the friends prefer. On most circumstances, we choose the one we like instead of another. The main reason is that we know which dress on us look thinner, which coat makes us feel taller and which pants are more comfortable. Others' opinions, perhaps, could give us useful information, but the final one is made by our own. From trivial things to vital matters, the best decision is made by us.


In addition, the reason why so many people making decisions by themselves are that does good to cultivate independence and career succeeds. The procedure of deciding requires independent thinking and integration capabilities of information. A significant decision needs our utmost to probe the truth no matter how nonsignifant which can influence the way of the whole thing. For example, a CEO or just a manager in a company has to deal with plenty of complicated affairs and makes a lot of decisions every day. If they rely on colleagues or their boss to decide all business affairs, I am afraid, they would ever and never feel the sense of promotion.


There is no denying that letting others replace us to decide will reduce our pressure and responsibilities. However, doing by ourselves not only can find the most suitable things but also can build our virtues, which is also most people’s choice.

yzwdan818

同学，你好！队长安排我和你3.10号互改，你的文章还写吗？

第一二三只

实在很抱歉，贴得怎么晚！耽误你修改了，我真的很抱歉啊！！！！下次不会了！！我会及时看通知的！

第一二三只

3.14独立
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
老师给学生自信比教专门知识更重要。

1,confidence influent the entire life ;决定孩子健康成长的心态，有助于提高学习兴趣，取得好成绩。
2, 自信是成功的基石。eg,将军打仗，coins ,正面。
自我暗示，a power. satifatory, happiess feelling;  lose--desperation

yzwdan818

实在很抱歉，贴得怎么晚！耽误你修改了，我真的很抱歉啊！！！！下次不会了！！我会及时看通知的！

-- by 会员 第一二三只 (2013/3/14 13:38:42)

没事儿，我今天晚上给你改好，但是可能会稍微晚点，我自己还有13号的作文没写，还要给其它同学改，我尽量晚上11点之前改完~