argument第66篇，求大神指导啊！！！

lhy9173

According to a survey conducted by Cheeses of the World magazine, the author proposed that all of the stores ought to discontinue stocking many of their varieties of imported cheese in order to improve profits. Well intended the author might be, we cannot evaluate whether this recommendation will contribute to the improvement of profits unless the author could answer some critical questions.

Firstly, we may ask that are the subscribers of Cheeses of the World representative of all the consumers throughout the country? Even though many of the people who read this magazine prefer to domestic cheeses, the author fail to rule out the possibility that there are a number of people who favor the imported cheeses. Thus hastily limiting the inventory of imported cheeses may make the majority of consumers unsatisfied. Without convincing us that the subscribers are representative, the author cannot make the argument tenable.

Granted that the people having responded the survey are deed representative of all the customers, we are still confused whether the situation at the newest store is as same as other stores. The author unfairly assumes that there are no substantial differences between the newest stores and other stores. Due to the factors like climate and traditions, people residing in different places may have different taste, the popularity of cheeses may not be identical in different cities. So the author needs to take the possibility into account in order to make a justifiable conclusion.

The author considered the limitation of inventory of imported cheese the best way to improve profits. To fully evaluate this assertion, we may well ask whether there are some alternative approaches to improve the profits of all stores, such as adopting advanced technology of producing cheeses to curtail the cost and improving their quality of service to attract more consumers. Besides, without answering the question that whether the profit of selling domestic cheeses is higher than that of selling imported cheeses. Due to the lack of the respective profits of the two kinds of cheeses, we cannot evaluate the argument.

To sum up, the author truly provided us with some justified evidence, he still need to answer the questions listed above to strengthen his argument. The author ought to substantiate that the subscribers are representative and the newest store has deed reflect the general situation. Unless we may not believe that the recommendation proposed will carry out the predicted result.

普渡哥

写得很好，中间三段加上恰当的连接词就更好了。