求诚挚评估。本人水平能不能加入写作小分队

pedrohuo

TPO 24 Writing

TOPIC: One of the best ways that parents help teenage children prepare for adult life is to encourage them to take a part-time job.

More and more teenagers are encouraged to take a part-time job by their parents nowadays. It is considered one of the best way for parents to help their teenage children to prepare for adult life. After thinking about it from several aspects, I strongly agree with this statement, and the points below support my opinion.

To begin with, part-time job affects attitudes toward life of teenage children. A child, used to be the center of one family, now has to behave as part of society. Nobody would continue to spoil him/her outside home. What one teenager can do to get along with other social members is to show his/her respect and virtue. Thus the attitude toward life has been modified into give rather than to get. For instance, graduated from high school, I took a part-time job to deliver newspaper for the entire community. With the money earned, I bought presents for my parents on Christmas Day for the first time in my life. The job taught me a lot.

Furthermore, teenage children tend to realize the hardship of life and get a better understanding of their parents. Any part-time job, even washing dishes, would make children exhausted after a day's hard work. Common sense informs us that survival in society is harsher than people's imagination. A recent survey conducted by State Statistics Bureau of China in 2012 indicates that nearly 8 percent families are on the verge of bankruptcy. Hence, on no account can teenage children ignore the painstakings of their parents. Meanwhile, that's the reason why parents are willing to help children grow up quickly.

Last but not least, humankind have stepped into economy era. Taking a part-time job helps teenage children to get paid. It is a precious opportunity for them to manage money matters like adults. Teenagers may start to learn how to register a new bank account, how to do investments, how to consume commodities, and in turn that leads to a quick growth of these children.

To sum up, parents should encourage teenage children to take a part-time job. With the healthier attitude toward life, the better understanding of their parents, the conception of managing money maters, teenage children are ready for the coming adult life. Therefore, when we see the confident smiles of  these teenagers in society, let us just wish them a better furture.
一直想加入写作小分队。可是总担心自己水平太差。
请问各位大牛。我的水平。托福作文能答多少分。本人比较害羞。在写作小分队里。是什么水平。从最初的一味喜欢写长句。进步到现在的短句。不知道是不是对的

Regards

pedrohuo

我感觉托福的第一切入口是。知道什么是好托福作文，什么是坏托福作文。
可是。我现在真的搞不懂了。迷茫了。

steigen

我也是刚刚接触托福，觉得很多地方还是蛮迷茫的。。。  加入写作小分队吧  我也刚刚加入 蛮受用的~

瓜瓜不瓜

先去大本营看看小分队运行的规则哈~http://forum.chasedream.com/TOEFL_Writing/thread-741014-1-1.html

fuzhengrui