独立写作求改正,给意见...个人觉得思路也不是特别好,求大家狠拍.

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Do you agree or disagree : Although science and technology will continue to improve, the most significant improvement for the quality of people's lives have already taken place.



Hasevery individual in the world been immune to the harm by the diseases? Hasevery individual in the contemporary experienced living in out of the earth? Hasevery individual nowadays travelled the universe? Since the answer to all thesethree questions is no, it is irrational and illogical to claim that the publichas achieved the greatest improvement.

Atfirst glance, I have to concede that the life quality of human nature seems to,at certain degree, reach its peak. For one thing, people could hardly imagemassive changes in the future.

Nevertheless,the conclusion that folks have already accessed to the best life quality is notimmune to several defects, which degrades this claim as problematic. It can belogically infer that our ancestors who lived in thousands of years ago cannoteasily figure out the modern life - people travel by plane and communicatethrough cell phones or internet. Moreover, numerous illustriously fantasticimaginations have not come true even nowadays.

Medicalarea is one of the areas that have an unpredictably large space to improve. Cancer,AIDS and some cardiac diseases are universally acknowledged as incurable orhard-to-cure illnesses, which have deprived innumerable lives in this society. Itis no deny that doctors and scientists have brought an ocean of medicalbreakthrough and we can positively believe that in the coming future, humanscan get rid of any trouble from diseases, besides which they can use a varietyof medicines to improve their bodies, such as easily changing their height andweight without any pain or terrible result.

Telecommunicationis another field that can bring humans gorgeous progress. When the firsttelephone came with age, few can conceive the power of cell phone; when thefirst cell phone appeared, few can predict the change brought by the IPHONE. Accordingto the International Telecommunication (Vol.121), only 45.7% of the earth iscovered by communicating networks. We can image that in the impending future, thenumber will be higher than 95%. The speed and quality of communication throughcell phone will greatly increase because of the technical development.

Obviously,all the analysis above points to a remarkable perspective that folks have notreached the peak quality of life, as a result of which it can be unpredictablybetter in possession of technical development.

sweetmelody321

Has every individual(person比较合适吧individual强调个人) in the world been immune to the harm by the（harmful）diseases? Has every individual in the contemporary(today 就可以了contemporary主要是指当代) experienced living in out of the earth(the life in the space)? Has every individual nowadays travelled the universe（跟第二点类似）? Since the answer to all these three（显得多余）questions is no, it is irrational and illogical to claim that the publichas achieved（reached） the greatest improvement. 感觉没有明显的因果关系，推论不够有说服力

感觉下了不少功夫，但是还是要在语法准确的基础上来创新。思路和逻辑还需要加强一下，另外有点chinglish，建议开始先多看看满分作文之类的



PS：我自己作文也很烂，楼主多听听别人的意见，多练习