第一篇issue 87，求拍~~

birdyhuang

其实之前写了一篇..不过写了两个小时..后来调整一下，压缩了点时间，大概一个小时多一点点的样子..
语言就不想吐槽了，只能说将就看吧..例子也是有点扯..
想请问下大神们这样的文章大概能拿多少分？？还有麻烦指点下该怎么改进~

1小时，400字

87Claim: Any piece of information referred to as a fact should be mistrusted,

since it may well be proven false in the future.

Reason: Much of the information that people assume is factual actually turns

out to be inaccurate.(239)



提纲


1.由于当前科技等因素限制，部分信息确实存在一定的不确定性
2.但不能说所有信息都不可信，哪怕有缺陷，但仍然为人们所接受
3.哪怕确实是不正确的，但它是人类前进的方向，为人类的繁荣提供经验


The speaker's claim is actually threefold: (1)Much of the "factual" information are actually not accurate. (2)No information which has been considered as a fact, should be trusted. (3)It is because of the inaccuracy revealed later that we should not put any faith in the factual information. It is tempting to agree with the speaker on the basis that there are more or less sorts of imprecision within information we mentioned. However, while supporting the first arguments, I would strongly disagree with the two latter ones.
.
I concede that the speaker is on the correct side when it comes to the existence of inaccuracy of the information, resulted from the restraint of current technology and knowledge. Take Ptolemaic for instance. Ptolemaic, one of the most famous physicists of his time, discovered the geocentric theory, which was once widely regarded as truth yet was proved wrong later by Copernicus. It is because of the limit of the machinery and facility that Ptolemaic failed to give out the genuine truth.


Yet, there is no justification to support that no message is worth our trust for although there exist some defects, part of those information still works well, such as the Newton method by Newton, the Theory of Evolution by Darwin, the Relativity by Einstein, and etc, all of which were, are, and will be accepted as standards, aptly illustrating the argument that there are always some pieces of information for us to rely on.


In fact, even if all of the information, which has been considered to be valid(correct), is later proved false, it is still necessary for us to keep enough faith with it for the sake of the evidence provided by it for our progress. The blossom of humankind, requiring eternal efforts to carry on promotions, can never be achieved by one night. For example, Edison, the inventor of the lamp bulb, still believing in the correctness of his theory after all those miserable failure, eventually devised bulbs successfully. It was nothing but his everytime failure that assisted him to advance.


In sum, whether we may believe in the information should be determined by how much contribution it can make to the development of our society rather than by the extent to which it is accurate. With the experience provided by the relatively true information, irrespective of its vagueness(inaccuracy), we will undoubtedly make our considerable leap towards future.

birdyhuang

有没有好心人给说说..主要是大概能有多少分~.~

竹林中人

个人觉得，Issue作文如果只是停留在对某个话题描述性的论述上，看不出你自己的思考的痕迹，而是很多人都可以想到的，那么有理由认为你对这个问题的认识不够深入，角度不够高。
仅就你这篇文章而言，我觉得是不错的，提纲还是很好的，你的论证还需要加强，句与句之间衔接，相互支持。

birdyhuang

先谢谢版主哈~
关于思考深度的问题我有想过，只是考虑到这个是应试备考，觉得形成模式化的思维比较有把握，特别是行文方面如果有固定框架相对来说不容易紧张导致失常，避免临场思考不够深入又不知道该怎么形成文字这样的问题..
还有就是想问下论证方面的加强是指例子不够恰当和语言不够连贯么？
麻烦了~

竹林中人

所谓论证，比如说你有一个分论点，写了之后，后面不要直接接例子，而应该有一两句强调性的或者支撑性的话，这样形成一个句群来说明一个意思，再就是句与句之间代词指代要明确，这样才显得浑然一体。


另外，不建议作文形成一个固定的模式，每个类型的题目每个话题都会有不同的思想和辩证意味，如果有一个统一的模式或者什么的，只会是三分，GRE作文不是应试作文，而是看出你批判性思维的一个东西，没有深入的分析，档次是上不去的