二十一号就要一站了，刚开始准备作文，真是罪过罪过，写了一篇，希望大家多多批评指教！！谢谢

樱桃悠悠

Working at home using computers or telephones in better than working in the office

Faced with the question of whether working at home or working in the office, I came to the conclusion that basically this two working place have a major difference that radically influence my choice. I believe that working in the office, despite being somewhat restricted, is a more reasonable choice as it could bring with not only effective result, but also the pleasure relationship with coworkers to the person involved. In contract, working at home can only lead to more troubles.

Some people prefer to working at home using computers or telephones because they think they like the sense of freedom. But are they really as free as they see to be at first glance? First of all, rarely can anyone have the qualification to arrange the work by himself/herself. In most cases, those who work at home are waiting for the works and plans all the time. It poses a threat to the personal life in some extent. My sister is a solo who is a translator working at home. All of her friends appreciate her work because she could make a bunch of money, wearing the most comfortable clothes at home and avoiding the troubles in the traffic jam. However, every coin has two sides. She always has to work until midnight because of the closing deadline. Her boss is very strict to her as it seems evitable that she has to pay more for relax at home. She has mixed her life and her job together. One day, my sister told me she was too tired to tolerate this kind of mundane and stressful life. It was the time to find a regular job working in the office.

Second, there is no denying that it is more effective and efficient to work in the office. Working in the office, we can ask for recommendation from the coworkers. They will help us update the information on our current projects. That is the reason many projects need a team instead of an individual. Nothing is more direct than face-to-face in communication. Persons in one team could exchange their ideas and discuss some controversial problems directly. As a result, they could finish their work as soon as possible. I think that is why many companies invest the money to rent regular buses to pick up their employees instead of letting them work at home. Some rules and controls will help us to keep things in perspective. If you can see that, you can understand it more deeply.

In addition, one of the perks of working in the office is that we can work with other like-minded individual. We will meet and deal with an increasing number of people during the work. This is the opportunity to know some friends who will help us get out of the trouble in future. Assuming that we work at home every day, facing the computer screen, is it possible for us to know some new friends and enjoy the delightful moment brought by friendship? I am afraid the answer is no. When I was an internship in an international company, I have met a lot of people who are very kind and nice. They taught me how to promote my image as a serious professional in future as well as gave me a complete panoramic view of the society. I enjoyed working in the office very much.

To sum up, due to the above mentioned reasons, I disagree with the statement. And I hold the belief that working in the office is much better than working at home using computers or telephones.

fenkesi

注意文中的代词指代，有好几处指代不明，而且不要用it 或者that 指代前面的句子  
第三段there is no denying通常是用来让步的，文中用来引出支持的第二个原因的，这个不太好
结尾段due to一般等同于caused by, 放在这里不好，不能代替because of ,

樱桃悠悠

看的这么认真~灰常感谢~~