求高手修改作文

yiet22

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement:

The best way for parents to teach their children about responsibility is to have them care for animals.(Education & Animals)



Responsibility is essential. For most of the people, it means loyalty to family and their jobs. Without the sense of responsibility, one is not a qualified man. We all know what a terrible thing it is when one is remarked as irresponsible. Clearly, the sense of responsibility is a habit and the most solid habit is brought up in one’s childhood.



From many ways can children learn how to be a responsible man, and learning to care for animals might be effective. It is well known that children tend to love little animals. Many children’s best friend is practically an animal. Their nutaral love for animals is a prerequisite for them to be responsible. If they love such little pets they will feel obliged to offer them good living conditions and take care of them. Furthermore, a pet is like a man, and they need constantly love. In the process of nursing, children must learn how to always keep their enthusiasm and always treat the animals well. Naturally and consequently, they will understand the meaning of responsibility.



Besides, adults can learn responsibility from how to support their families and how to do their jobs well, but for children, such chance doesn’t exist. Because it is the time that the family shows responsibility to their children rather than what is on contrary. In contrast, children indeed could learn responsibility from taking good care of animals. And once they acquired such valuable quality, they will surely apply it to the attitude towards their family and jobs when they grow up.



Admittedly, having children care for animals is a practical way. But it is not necessarily the best way. One thing we must know is that responsibility to persons and jobs is much more complicated than to animals. Because human and human affairs are much more sophisticated than animals whose primary need is only to survive and to breed. Thus, children should not only learn from taking care of animals but also, more importantly, learn from the deeds of their parents and their own experiences.

bull113

Responsibility is essential. For most of the people, it means loyalty to family and their jobs. (does not make sense....)Without the sense of responsibility, one is not a qualified man. We all know what a terrible thing it is when one is remarked as irresponsible. Clearly, the sense of responsibility is a habit and the most solid habit is brought up in one’s childhood.  (in fact, the sense of responsibility is more like a quality of a man rather than a habit)



From many ways can children learn how to be a responsible man, (children  vs.  a man??)and learning to care for animals might be effective. It is well known that children tend to love little animals. Many children’s best friend is practically an animal. Their nutaral love for animals is a prerequisite for them to be responsible. If they love such little pets they will feel obliged to offer them good living conditions and take care of them. Furthermore, a pet is like a man, and they need constantly love. In the process of nursing, children must learn how to always keep their enthusiasm and always treat the animals well. Naturally and consequently, they will understand the meaning of responsibility. (why do these children can understand the meaning of responsibility? I think it is not only love,but how did they treat with and rise their pets? for instant, they need to feed pets regularly and take care of them on regular basis. take bath for pets, even feed tablelets for pets wwhen pets get sick etc.)



Besides, adults can learn responsibility from how to support their families and how to do their jobs well, but for children, such chance doesn’t exist. Because it is the time that the family shows responsibility to their children rather than what is on contrary. In contrast, children indeed could learn responsibility from taking good care of animals. And once they acquired such valuable quality, they will surely apply it to the attitude towards their family and jobs when they grow up.



Admittedly, having children care for animals is a practical way. But it is not necessarily the best way. One thing we must know is that responsibility to persons and jobs is much more complicated than to animals. Because human and human affairs are much more sophisticated than animals whose primary need is only to survive and to breed. Thus, children should not only learn from taking care of animals but also, more importantly, learn from the deeds of their parents and their own experiences.

yiet22

3q bull113 ~感觉比较受用

虽然我托福已经考完了 嘿嘿